


Al Bhed Blue

by Scottie2



Category: Final Fantasy X
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-13
Updated: 2018-01-06
Packaged: 2018-04-26 03:53:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 31
Words: 55,914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4989247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scottie2/pseuds/Scottie2
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Al Bhed Blue - Final Fantasy X retelling based on a big "What If" - What if Tidus hadn’t gotten knocked off the Al Bhed ship at the beginning of the game because Sin never came? What would have happened if he stuck with Rikku and the crew? Hopefully a good read…</p><p>Originally Posted at FF.net. Revised a fully posted here at AO3</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. New Beginnings

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: (Final Revisions): 
> 
> 30 Chapters and 12 years later, Al Bhed Blue is finished. The Epilogue is coming, and I have a feeling you will like it! However, I am being devious and going to make you wait a little bit longer.
> 
> There was a long period where this fic was for all intents and purposes abandoned. It didn’t seem to matter, though, that some years had passed since my last update. I continued getting emails and direct messages from people asking that I finish the story. It was always a pleasant surprise to see the alert in my inbox that Al Bhed Blue had received a review, even though it might have been years since my last update.
> 
> So as we near the end I just want to give a heartfelt thank you to everyone who ever read, favorited, followed, and reviewed this fanfic. A special thank you goes to the reviewers and those who sent direct messages, because I never would have hit chapter 30 without you.
> 
> This can’t compare in any way to the support I have gotten over (I’ll say it again) 12 years, but hopefully it will do. I am going through and doing a Final Revision of the entire work. My intentions are threefold: the first is to post this over at AO3 which I will be doing chapter by chapter as I revise. The second is to go through and clean up formatting so that this piece works as a whole, instead of varying chapter by chapter with layout and the way that the Al Bhed language is used. Finally, the last thing I will be doing is fixing some storyline issues and making little changes here and there that help give the story and overall structure. (Yes, this means I will finally fix my big flub up over how Tidus’ mother died to reflect the actual FFX in-game reason!)
> 
> To everyone who has ever read this: Thank You.
> 
> \--  
> \--
> 
> Original A/N (2003): This fic is based on a big ‘what if’, which I hope you find interesting:
> 
> What if Tidus hadn’t gotten knocked off the Al Bhed ship at the beginning of the game because Sin never came? What would have happened if he stuck with Rikku and the crew? Hopefully a good read…
> 
> Note: This story begins where Tidus tells Rikku where he is from and she thinks he had been affected by Sin’s toxin.

1000 years? Sin…Luca…My Zanarkand, a holy place? She’s got to be joking… right? This is so unreal. Yet here I was, on the deck of this ship, with people who speak in a different language.

I did the only thing I could; I waited. I didn’t have any clue where I was or what an “Al Bhed” might be. Everything was confusing, especially since the only one who could seemingly speak my language was Rikku.

“Welp, I’ve got good news and bad news!”

I turned to see Rikku standing by the entrance into the ship.

“I uh…pulled a few strings…and I convinced my brother to take you to Luca!”

Okay… uh, so what’s the bad news?” I wasn’t too thrilled at the prospects of this “Luca”, but I guess it was better than the cold metal deck of a ship.

“Well…since we finally got the big prize…” Rikku pointed at one of the common airships found in Zanarkand. It had been hitched up to ship and was being slowly towed along. I noticed there was some kind of logo on its side, there was a big circle with a picture on it. I couldn’t quite make it out but I think it was the travel airship of an opposing blitzball team. Judging by the design it was for the C-South Duggles. The Abes’ luxury edition Kennet Airship was better though…definitely more roomy…

“…so we’ll have to go…hey…are you listening?”

Rikku’s comment snapped me out of my thoughts. “Sorry… I was just thinking about the airship… it’s the ship an opposing team uses for travel games. I was actually playing against them before Sin came…” I stopped when I saw Rikku’s expression. I saw in her face a look of pure confusion with a little bit of excitement underneath.

I smiled at this reaction. “Oh sorry, you probably don’t know what I’m talking about. I play for the Zanarkand Abes, that ship belongs to the Zanarkand Duggles, our rivals. You know…blitzball…” I made a kicking motion.

“Wait…you…you’ve seen technology like this before? I mean…you know how to operate it and everything?” Rikku’s eyes were wide open, for what reason I had no clue.

“Well…I dunno about flying it. I mean, occasionally when I got bored I would go talk with the pilot of our ship. He gave me a few pointers on flying in exchange for some blitzball tips. I don’t remember a lot. But hey, I can turn it on at least!” I chuckled at my joke; anyone could turn on an airship.

“Fryd? You know how to turn this on? That’s impossible! This is the first airship we have been able to get our hands on! A while ago we found a few sketches of some of these machina ships in an old underwater city, we’ve been looking for one for months!” Rikku began pacing back and forth.

“Whoa whoa! Calm down, Rikku! Didn’t mean to get you all excited!”

Rikku turned to look at me. It was then I noticed her eyes were a cool green color, but her pupils were spiral-shaped. It took some effort not to stare. They were… weird, but cool.

Rikku continued on in her excitement. “Are you positive?”

“Yeah, of course. Maybe one day I can show you the Abes’ ship.”

Rikku flashed a big grin. “Come with me right now!”

Before I could respond my hand was in hers and I was dragged into the ship. I got a lot of dirty looks from the men I passed, but eventually we got to the end of a long hall into a room where the man with tattoos all over his chest sat looking over some drawings or maps or something. 

“Brother! Drec ec ehlnatepma! Drec ec cu ehlnatepma!” Rikku shouted, surprising who I now assumed to be her brother out of his intent study.

_Brother! This is incredible! This is so incredible!_

“Rikku? Fryd ec cu...” He looked in my direction and his eyes widened. “Fro tet oui pnehk drec fiend eh rana?” My mind hopelessly tried to understand what he was saying. I think he called me a fiend but I wasn’t sure.

_What is so... Why did you bring this fiend in here?_

“Dryd'c fryd'c ehlnatepma! Ra ghufc ruf du ubanyda dra yencreb!” Rikku exclaimed. She jumped up and down a bit, motioning towards me.

_He's what's incredible! He knows how to operate the airship!_

“Fryd? Dryd'c esbuccepma. Huputo ryc ajan ajah duilrat yh yencreb pavuna ic. Ruf fuimt drec fiend ghuf? E tuh'd pameaja ed.” Once again, I think he called me a fiend. This was starting to give me a headache.

_What? That's impossible. Nobody has ever even touched an airship before us. How would this fiend know? I don't believe it._

“Fro fuimt ra mea? E ghuf! Ra lyh bnuja ed cusaruf...is...”

_Why would he lie? I know! He can prove it somehow...um..._

Brother gave a cocky smile. That couldn’t be good. “Fine. Fro tuh'd fa cruf dra fiend cusadrehk ajah fa tuh'd ghuf ruf du ica. Ev ra lyh ubanyda ed dryh E femm pameaja res. Rao, Jekud! lusa rana!”

_Why don't we show the fiend something even we don't know how to use. If he can operate it than I will believe him. Hey, Jekud! Come here!_

At this a man came in the room. I was still very, very lost. As ‘Brother’ began talking to the man who just arrived I moved over towards Rikku.

“Um…Rikku? What’s going on?”

Rikku frowned. “I’m not calling you a liar…but you’re sure you can operate an airship?”

Yep, that headache was in full force now. “I told you, I can’t fly very well but I can do some basic stuff.”

Rikku smiled. “I knew you wouldn’t lie, I could tell. But Brother thinks you are a fiend, he doesn’t believe you. So Jekud-“ She motioned towards the man talking to ‘Brother’, “- is going to bring some machina that even we haven’t figured out how to use. If you know how to pilot an airship maybe you can show us how to use some other stuff.” She flashed me the grin I was beginning to like.

“Rikku…I told you…I don’t know how to pilot the ship I only know how…”

Suddenly ‘Brother’ shoved me away from his sister and dragged me out of the room. He took me down a long hallway then down another long hallway. We arrived into a dimly lit storage room. Jekud, who had accompanied us, grabbed something off one of the dusty shelves and handed it to me roughly.

I looked at the device he handed to me and tried to make out what it was. It was covered in dust and looked like it was several hundred years old, but no mistake about it, it was an electric razor. A voice activated one, the kind my old man used to have. He’d only bother to shave before a blitzball game, said the beard slowed him down in the water. In the off-season he’d just let it grow and grow.

“Drana. Damm sa fryd drec ec!” Brother exclaimed.

_There. Tell me what this is!_

I wasn’t sure what he said but I figured he wanted me to turn it on. I briefly was worried it wouldn’t activate given how old it looked, but handheld electronics like this were usually solar powered and had incredibly efficient energy storage. Why not try to turn it on?

I pushed the button for it to receive the voice activate command. “Uh…’close shave’ please,” I spoke into it. The blue hand sized mechanism began to make a ‘whrrrrrr’ sound as it turned on. I didn’t have any hair on my face to shave, so I just held onto it.

Brother’s face lit up; his eyes were as big as Rikku’s on the deck.

I tried to explain. “Nothing complicated... Just a voice activated electric shaver.” I made a shaving motion with my hand to try to get the point across. Neither Brother nor Jekud seemed to understand; they were both too busy starting at the little machine.

“Rikku! Lusa rana! Dnyhcmyda vun sa! Ycg res fryd drec ec!” Brother shouted. A few seconds later, Rikku entered the room.

_Rikku! Come here! Translate for me! Ask him what this is!_

She said a few words to Brother then returned her attention to me. “He wants to know what that thing is.” She pointed to the shaver. 

“This? This is just a shaver. You know, beards, sideburns, whatever.”

Rikku gave a surprised look then I presume translated for Brother. Jekud, who had a small goatee similar to Brother’s, grabbed the razor out of my hand and brought it to his face. The goatee was gone in an instant, leaving a nice smooth chin.

Jekud let out an excited cry. He and Brother began rambling on in their language while I just turned to Rikku. “It’s nothing really. My dad has one of these when I was little.”

She laughed. “I can’t believe it. I mean I knew you weren’t lying, but I guess I just thought you were delusional or something, or imagined this in a dream because of Sin’s toxin. But…whoa…”

“Ruf tuac ed fung? Ruf tuac ed fung!?” Brother asked Rikku.

_How does it work? How does it work!?_

She turned to me. “He wants to know how it works.”

I laughed. I was even starting to like Brother and Jekud. They were like kids in a candy store. Jekud was practically bouncing off the walls, feeling his chin over and over again, as if he was double-checking that the razor really shaved his goatee off. Rikku just continued staring at me with those eyes. I couldn’t really understand the look she was giving me. Who knew using an electric razor could get this sort of reaction?

[][]  
[][]

Well, that about sums up how I ended up having a permanent place on the Al Bhed ship. With the help of Rikku’s translating I fully explained to Brother how the electric razor worked. We spent some time going through some of the other miscellaneous items in the storage closet; most were just common electronic items you’d find in any normal Zanarkand home. Although I was intimidated at first by Brother’s intense looks and his tattoo-covered tough guy look, we quickly feel into an easy repertoire. By the time I was showing him how play a simple game on an old rusty portable video game device, we were interacting like old friends.

Later, at Brother’s command Rikku had brought me to what would become my own room on the ship. We talked a bit more and she told me she couldn’t wait till they got ‘to Home’ so I could show them how to use the airship. At that point I simply gave up trying to tell her I had no idea how to operate the thing. Her excitement was so infectious, I started wondering if maybe I did know how to fly it.

Things were looking up. I was no longer sleeping on the hard metal deck of the ship, but I was still very confused. At least the crewmembers weren’t still giving me looks of disgust. Actually, their looks of awe reminded me somewhat of some of my blitzball fans.

Rikku tells me the salvage ship is moving slowly given its large cargo, the airship. It will be several days before we reach our destination. I figure that’s fine, maybe with some rest and time to think I could start piecing together what exactly has happened to me.

The comforting hum of the ship engines begins lure me to sleep. My last thoughts before I succumb to my exhaustion are not about my current predicament, but about the beautiful girl who just saved my life.


	2. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tidus returns with Rikku and the Al Bhed to Home on Bikanel Island. Tidus learns more about Spira and finds himself spending more and more time with his translator...

I have often wondered, how it is one can tell one’s story without being trite or ridden with cliches? Take any characters and setting and I swear the tale automatically becomes a new version of the old ‘hero saves world, gets the girl’ formula. I never liked stories like that, they quickly become boring not to mention very improbable.

 

Yet here I was, setting myself up for just that.

 

The hero part really isn’t my fault! What I would describe as an average understanding of what in Zanarkand would be considered basic technology made me light years ahead of the Al Bhed, much to their joy and my slight dismay.

 

Jekud had pulled me aside the day after they found me, making sure to grab Rikku as translator. “Tidus,” he had said, “we want you to help us. With your help we can finally create a weapon powerful enough to destroy Sin! We have been trying to make a bridge from where we are now to what they had in the ancient times. You are that bridge!”

 

Word spread fast among the Al Bhed and before I knew it I was looked upon as the ‘gift’ or ‘kevd’ that would save Spira. I mean, I want to do all I can to help, but I’m just an 18-year-old guy who was whisked away from his first season of professional blitzball. What did I know about machines, besides the basics? Still, I gave Brother and Jekud my word that I would help them as best as possible. I had no problem acknowledging that they had saved my life the day they picked me up, and if that was how they wanted to be repaid, I guess I’m getting off easy.

 

That leaves the other half of your classic hero story: the girl. Playing the role of ‘the girl’ is the beautiful Rikku, my only life raft in a big big sea of craziness. I spent a lot of time with her right off the bat, mostly because she was the only one speaking my language. She would explain anything I wanted to know, about the Al Bhed, about Sin, and eventually about Yevon and the summoners. Occasionally, I would ask her about herself, and she would happily answer and respond with a question about my life back in Zanarkand. I found that she really cared about what I went through, more than just the typical “I’m sorry that happened” kind of thing.

 

After I had learned practically all that could be taught about Spira without actually seeing it for myself, well, I really didn’t have as much reason to spend time with her anymore. Jekud and I were becoming fast friends. He would try to talk in broken Spiran and I would try to talk in broken Al Bhed, using words I had picked up from the crew and Rikku. Communication never really worked out quite right, but we were becoming friends nevertheless and I liked to hang out with him.

 

And yet, instead of spending time with Jekud or some of the other Al Bhed guys I had become familiar with, I found myself taking all my free opportunities to spend time with Rikku. I don’t really know why, but I could list a few possible reasons: She had one of those magnetic personalities, somebody you always wanted to be around. She was funny, energetic and never boring. She was the girl in all those stories, all those unrealistic females that you claimed could never exist, never be _that_ perfect.

 

So here I was, my first day in Home only three weeks after I left Zanarkand…and my trite, seemingly impossible story begins.

 

[][]

[][]

 

Rikku came bounding in to the room they had holed me up in. It was a cool room, vibrant Al Bhed colors with some crazy machina furniture that put my room back home to shame. Knowing what was coming I wearily plopped myself into a very comfortable chair.

           

She came in with her grin wide as ever, a pair of scissors and that god-awful voice activated shaver. “Come on, Tidus! It’ll look sooooo cool!”

 

We’d been back and forth over this for like an hour. “No Rikku! Anything but the hair, man!” The crazy girl wanted to give me an Al Bhed cut, but I wasn’t going to just up and let go of the haircut I’ve been sporting for nearly 10 years. My hair was like my pride and joy, there was no way I was going to let my Al Bhed friend get her hands on it. Well, not with a razor in her hand anyways.

 

“You big meanie! Too many of the people here are suspicious of you, you have to blend in a bit before anybody trusts you!”

 

Like I said before, helping Brother and Jekud out was fine by me. I wanted to do as much as I could to repay my debt. If I have to look like an Al Bhed that’s fine, I mean the people are great and like nothing I had ever seen before, content in their work and life.

 

Rikku had told me that beyond just blending in I could choose to “become” Al Bhed. There was some sort of a long ceremony type process. Rikku refused to give up many details, except that certainly before I ‘became Al Bhed’ I would have to look like one, hence the haircut and soon a change of clothes. All topped off with my own snazzy pair of goggles.

 

“Tidus? Hellooooo in there?” Rikku’s hand waving frantically in my face knocked me out of my thoughts.

 

“Yeah yeah, I know. Gotta look Al Bhed before I can become one, you told me.”

 

Rikku smiled. “Right! So if you don’t let me give you a haircut right this instant I will forever label you a big meanie, dumb as dumb can be.”

 

I smirked. “Yeah, and we can’t have that can we? I’m too nice to be labeled a big meanie.”

 

“That’s right. So, obviously you agree and I’ll begin right away!”

 

Before I could move a muscle Rikku had sat on me, gluing me to the chair, and began tying my hands to the chair, using some rope she miraculously fit into a pouch on her side.

 

“RIKKU! Get off! Hey…what? No, no, no!”

 

Rikku giggled, rising from my lap and pushing me towards a mirror in the corner of the room. “Don’t worry, after this you’ll look entirely awesome!”

 

[][]

[][]

 

I huffed, then flipped my hair to get a better look in the mirror. Rikku had cut it in a style I had seen many Al Bhed guys in, although she let me keep some of my own preferences visible. It was cut short, over the ear, and the side sort of hung down. My trademark spikes still made an appearance, the only difference is it was sort of closely shaved in the back. Okay, yeah, it looked awesome. But after being a little girl about it I wasn’t planning on letting Rikku know.

 

“See! I told you!” she exclaimed.

 

I feigned discontent. “Whatever…it’s alright for something an _amateur_ did…”

 

“Hey! That was a cheap shot!” Rikku responded. “Maybe I won’t untie you from this chair for a while. Have my way with you some more!”

 

Okay, what with my hormones flying around and encircling the entire room, Rikku’s proposition definitely didn’t sound like a bad thing. I struggled to focus.

 

“Don’t you have to give me some goggles or something?”

 

The goggles were really important. My blue eyes were sort of…how to put it…a big freakin obvious sign that I wasn’t Al Bhed. Everyone had those cool eyes, like Rikku’s, so in order to mask my ‘abnormality’ I was to wear the goggles almost constantly. Which wasn’t a big deal, when you’re holed up in a desert location everybody is wearing goggles to keep the sand out of the eyes. So, I would fit right in.

 

My devious friend finished untying me. I flexed my wrists then quickly bounded from the chair, before a certain girl could continue her torture.

 

“Yeah, here are some Al Bhed clothes. Change into these!” a pair of goggles and a blue and black colored outfit appeared in my hands.

 

Rikku quickly left the room; I’m not sure where she went. I quickly stripped out of my blitzball uniform and looked at the selection of clothing that was given to me. There were black and blue boots, slightly baggy tan pants, a black and blue long sleeved shirt, a pair of gloves, and finally, a brown vest with a lot of seemingly useless buckles and straps.

 

I had a hard time putting some of this stuff on, but I managed. I looked at myself in the mirror and swore I saw an Al Bhed behind me. Oh wait, that was me. Cool.

 

Turning I went to the exit of the door, making sure to put my goggles on before I left. Rikku was standing outside, humming a song or something.

 

“Ryja oui caah Tidus?” I asked her from behind, practicing some of the Al Bhed I had picked up over the weeks.

 

_Have you seen Tidus?_

 

“Oayr, ra'c eh drana." she replied, pointing in the general direction of my room.

 

_Yeah, he’s in there._

She turned and looked at me. There was a brief pause and then a look of recognition came over her face. “Tidus! I didn’t even recognize you!”

 

I laughed, my plan had worked. “I must admit, this stuff is much more comfortable then it looks…”

 

Rikku nodded. “Okay, Mr. Al Bhed. We’re pretty much shacked up here until my dad comes back from his meeting in Luca. What do you want to do?”

 

“You know, I’ve been here a while but I don’t think I ever got the tour?”

 

“Sure! But, don’t talk too loudly, speaking in Spiran is a good way to attract…unwanted attention…” I nodded and Rikku began leading me down a very long hallway.

 

[][]

[][]

 

Home looked like a prison. I could remember thinking this the first time I had seen it from the outside. But that was only until I walked inside and the colors and beauty sort of wiped that opinion out of my mind. It had a big tower in the center, surrounded by 8 identical towers that were all connected to the big tower and to one another. The outside was a sandy brown color, I guess to conceal its location by blending in with the surrounding desert.

 

We walked around for a while and I noticed that Rikku seemed to know everyone. Or maybe it was that everyone knew Rikku. Either way, she was asked a lot of questions about the man who was accompanying her. Each time she’d just give a sly wink to me and say ‘uha uv Brother’s vneahtc’, which seemed to satisfy the inquisitive Al Bhed.

 

_‘one of Brother’s friends’_

 

We eventually got back to my room, and I plopped down on my bed, exhausted not by the walk but by how much information my mind had to compute in a single day. I took my goggles off; I still had a long way to go before I got comfortable with them.

 

I looked up from where I lay to notice Rikku staring at me.

 

“What?”

 

She smiled; her eyes showed that she was in a pensive state. “Nothing…I just usually never see eyes like yours. I mean, I travel a lot with my dad but I never really bothered to look at other people’s eyes. Yours are blue like the water in a blitzball stadium!” she concluded, giggling.

 

“You guys play blitzball?”

 

Rikku gave me a puzzled look. “Duh! Our team is the Al Bhed Psyches. Hey! Why don’t we go meet them, they’re playing in a tournament in Luca next week, maybe you can help them practice.”

 

Without saying a word I was practically out the door, leaving Rikku to shout, “Wait! You don’t know the way!”


	3. Sunset

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While spending time with the Al Bhed on Bikanel Island, Tidus comes to learn some important information

 

I was learning new information every day.

 

For instance, yesterday I found out Brother’s real name is Cid. They just call him Brother because when Rikku was little she wouldn’t ever call him by his real name. Instead she just called him what he was, her brother. Apparently the name stuck and now everybody calls him that. Even _he_ prefers it, he told me so himself.

 

The day before yesterday I learned how Eigaar’s parents were killed in an attack by Sin. Back when he was a kid, his dad had played for the same Al Bhed Psyches blitzball team he is now captain of. His pop had been coming home on a ship after a big a victory in a tournament. Mid voyage Sin paid a visit…and well, that’s how it goes I guess. Life in the world of Spira.

 

Oh, and the day before t _hat_ I had learned of the blitzball tournament held in Luca. It was the tournament that marked the beginning of this years’ blitzball season for the six official teams in the league. The Al Bhed Psyches represented, of course, the Al Bhed, which had made Eigaar wonder whether or not I should be allowed to play with them. He knew as well as I how much I loved blitzball, so after about an hour of thinking and then another hour of linguistic practice I came up to him from behind and said:

 

“Y tyo mega drec sygac oui fuhtan ev dra cih crehac uhmo uh dra Al Bhed.”

 

_A day like this makes you wonder if the sun shines only on the Al Bhed..._

It was common phrase that could often be heard around Home. Eigaar nodded and agreed in Al Bhed, then turned around and was very much surprised to see me.

 

“You sounded just like an Al Bhed…!” my friend exclaimed.

 

He took the hint, and so now I was playing blitzball alongside some new friends. I also received a first class ticket on an Al Bhed ship to Luca.

 

[][]

[][]

 

Keeping up with my new pattern of life, today I learned something new too. The conversation started off innocently, with a simple question.

 

I was walking outside of Home because Jekud had told me about a certain spot on top of a sand dune where the sunset was just perfect. It wasn’t very far away at all and I’ve always been a sucker for sunsets.

 

The sun was slowly making its decent, but had not yet reached the horizon when I heard someone approach me from behind. I turned to see who it was and was pleased to see Rikku clad in her usual outfit of an orange shirt/vest and green shorts, along with a pair of goggles to protect against the sand. I never really got how she could wear so little in the desert setting.

 

She plopped alongside me confidently, and for a while we just watched intently as the sun made slow, eventual contact with the horizon.

 

After a little while of comfortable silence I turned and pensively asked her, “Rikku…where does the expression ‘Y tyo mega drec sygac oui fuhtan ev dra cih crehac uhmo uh dra Al Bhed’ come from?”

 

_A day like this makes you wonder if the sun shines only on the Al Bhed..._

 

She smiled slightly then turned to face me. “…My…mom used to say that all the time…back when I was really little…”

 

“Oh,” was my response. I wasn’t sure to go from there. I knew her dad was doing buisness in Luca or Djose Temple or something like that, but Rikku didn’t like to talk about him a lot. This was the first time she ever mentioned her mother in conversation…

 

I didn’t want to say something out of place so I changed focus. “Um…Rikku…how come you never talk about your Dad? I mean, you say stuff occasionally…”

 

Rikku shrugged. “My dad is Cid, I thought you knew that…” Her tone implied I might have ruined a moment.

 

Hold on, what? _Cid_ is Rikku’s father? She thought I knew that? Oh yeah, it’s just everyday somebody tells you his or her father is the leader of an entire people. I had heard a lot of stories about Cid, but _apparently_ everyone just up and forgot to mention that Rikku was his daughter. Terrific. Although, it did make a little sense now that I think about it. Brother must be a Cid _Jr._

 

“No…you didn’t you tell me that before…” I said, genuinely curious. Being the daughter of the head honcho didn’t seem like something to hide.

 

“Does it matter?” she asked, returning her attention to the sunset.

 

“Sorry.” I didn’t really know if I had said something wrong…so I decided to keep quiet.

 

“My dad…doesn’t like the idea of you being here, Tidus. Because you’re not Al Bhed…”

 

I thought about this for a moment, letting silence enter into our conversation. Rikku seemed a little hostile tonight…like she was upset about something…

 

“Isn’t he the one who began negotiations with the other peoples of Spira? I mean, if anything I thought he’d be friendlier to someone like me than the others.” Eigaar had told me about all the big stuff Cid had done. Rebuilding Home, establishing connections with the Crusaders…all of that.

 

Rikku shook her head. The light of the sunset gave her face a red glow, very becoming. I had to refocus my attention from staring at her on to what she was saying. “He doesn’t mind non Al Bhed…he just doesn’t like that Brother and I let you in here…Home.”

 

I still didn’t quite understand. I was helping them with their research of machina and what not. In order to do so I _had_ to be at Home…that’s where all the research was done and the ancient machina stored. Why would this be a problem?

 

“Before I was born…a man named Braska came to visit Home.” Rikku sighed, then continued. “He had become friends with my Dad in Luca, he hoped to make some more positive ties between the people of Yevon and the Al Bhed. So, he came here to visit and meet with my Pop. But when he was staying here he met my aunt…and they you know…hit it off and everything.”

 

Rikku grinned a bit, but it wasn’t the typical smile I had grown to like. “So they eventually got married…and boy was my Dad mad... He refused to speak with Braska…and so my aunt went to live with him in Bevelle.” Her grin faded.

 

“When I was 3 or so…my aunt and my Dad sort of made up. She and my mom were still good friends, so my mom convinced her to come back to Home for a visit. My aunt left from Luca…and on the way to Home…Sin attacked, and well…”

 

_Sin_. Everything came back to Sin in the end. Sin was why my home had been destroyed and I was sent adrift in the ocean, destined to die if it weren’t for the Al Bhed. Sin was why Eigaar’s parents were dead, why Rikku’s aunt was dead… and countless others. The thought made me angry, not an emotion I was used to dealing with unless my old man was around.

 

I looked over again see Rikku crying, her goggles temporarily removed. “My dad…he was so angry at my uncle…so angry with himself…”

 

“Hey…hey…don’t cry…” I said. I wanted to console her…I really did. But I still had this of this emotion, all of this anger to sort through.

 

“Rikku, that makes me so…angry.” I give out a frustrated little laugh. “You know, I am pretty easy going I’d like to think. The only thing that gets me angry this like is my old man.”

 

Rikku looked up at me, her eyes still wet with tears.

 

In retrospect, it was sort of selfish to turn the attention back to me. I wish I could have forgotten myself for the moment and just have been there for Rikku. But instead, I decided not to keep the anger inside.

 

“I hated my old man.” I said, my words rushed and harsh. I could tell Rikku was surprised at my tone. “He was a jerk; always obsessed with his own ego…never cared a bit about me. It’s kind of sad…he died when I was 7 but I hated him so much…I told myself I didn’t care.”

 

I felt Rikku’s eyes glance at me. I grabbed a handful of sand, watched as it fell through my fingers. “I think all I ever wanted was to impress him, but he always shot me down…but it’s funny.” I looked back at Rikku. “When Sin had you know…taken me here…I swear I saw him. And ever since I’ve been here…I can feel him.” I laughed at myself. Putting on my best announcer voice I said, “Old Jecht, star player of the Zanarkand Abes, will never die in the hearts of his fans.”

 

My Al Bhed friend cleared her throat. “Your dad’s name was Jecht?”

 

I nodded, not realizing the significance of it.

 

“There was a man named Jecht…he served as a guardian to my uncle when he went on his pilgrimage.”

 

Jecht was not a common name…

 

“Do you think…?” I couldn’t finish my question…because I didn’t know what say. A lot of things ran through my head.

 

Rikku stood up. She had wiped the tears from her eyes.

 

“The sunset’s gone,” she commented. It had been gone for a while now. The sky was dark, but the stars had not yet made their appearance.

 

I nodded and followed suit. We began the short walk back to Home, her hand finding a place in mine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: (2008): Originally I had this chapter explaining that Rikku’s mom was also killed along with her aunt, by Sin. But I found out later that Rikku mentions in FFX that her mom was killed by a machina on a rampage, so I changed the content in this chapter. I really want this fic to be thorough about details like this.


	4. Should we help?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tidus and the Al Bhed Psyches play at the Luca blitzball tournament. That is, until their game is interrupted.

Cid had decided not to stay for the Tournament. Well, that’s what Eigaar had told me anyways, he said Cid needed to attend to business in Home right away. When he told me I honestly didn’t really care, I was too excited about playing blitzball for the first time in a month and half. But now that our first game is over, well…now I realize that my future has yet again been put on hold. And I didn’t mind one bit.

 

Granted, I wanted to go through the Al Bhed initiation so that I could join this effort to put a stop to Sin. Because of this, ever since the talk Rikku and I had…well I was really nervous about my meeting with Cid. Logically I knew it wasn’t Cid’s fault…it wasn’t anybody’s fault what happened, Sin had just taken his sister away. But I also knew if I were in the same position I’d be cautious as hell as to who I’d let into Home. I guess my strongest argument was I was a washed up kid found in the middle of the ocean, no ties to anybody, no reason to ever leave. There was no way I could harm anybody; I was here to help.

 

Rikku had told me how the initiation process originated… the way an outside could ‘become Al Bhed.’ She still wouldn’t explain what this process was, but the story as to how it came to life was rather interesting.

 

Almost 300 years ago, two teenagers were found; lifeless and floating in the middle of the ocean; somewhere around Kilika. The boys had been cast out of their village after being caught playing with a newly discovered machina toy. They hadn’t known any better, but the hard-hearted priests of the village would hear nothing of it, and they had been cast out. When they got older the boys left the island jungle where they had supposedly stayed for a few years as outcasts and went in seek of an island of their own. They were both only 14 years old.

 

Using a crude ship the boys had made their way across the ocean, almost reaching the island they would often dream of, when a storm destroyed their craft and left them for dead. Right then an Al Bhed ship had passed and they were spotted and brought aboard.

 

“They were cast out of their village before they were even teenagers? That sounds a little incredulous.” I had said.

 

Rikku shook her head. “Back then…even now…Yevon’s word was Yevon’s word and that was enough reason to do anything.”

 

Her words sort of hit a string inside me, made me rethink my outlook on what the Al Bhed were trying to do. Here they were trying to save the world that hated them for no good reason. Sometimes I’d lie at night just wondering why they even bothered.

 

Anyways, the story took place back when the Al Bhed were living together before Yevon’s people…forced them into the desert. They were organized much like today, and the leader of the time had pity on the two boys. He agreed to let them join the tribe, so he created a process in which one ‘becomes’ Al Bhed. Rikku says that one of the boys went on to discover a rare machina; the other was a revered researcher.

 

“Pop will see how valuable you are, I’m sure he’ll let you join!” my friend exclaimed. The story was a big confidence booster, but I still was a little nervous about the whole thing. And what exactly was this initiation ceremony?

 

“Uh…I can’t tell you until it’s time…” was my only answer; not only from Rikku but from Jekud and Eigaar too, even Brother had the same reply... Tough luck for Tidus.

 

[][]

[][]

 

“Rao Tidus! Yfacusa crud!” cried some of my teammates as they reentered our locker room. We had just played the Besaid Aurochs, and we won too. I did my famous sphere shot with five seconds left on the clock, scoring the winning goal.

 

_Hey Tidus! Awesome Shot!_

 

The others had gone out to get a drink at a bar in downtown, but I had taken a rather rough beating from one of the opposing defendant, I needed a breather. Besides, I had to prep myself for our next game against the Luca Goers. From what I hear they were no pushovers.

 

Eigaar was one of the last to stroll in, a big grin on his face.

 

“I knew I wouldn’t regret putting you on the team!” he exclaimed, patting me on the back. “You have to teach me that shot one day, man!”

 

I readily agreed; I owed a lot to Eigaar. He was a cool guy, always helping me out when my limited Al Bhed became apparent in conversation. I could tell I could always depend on him, which I don’t think I ever had in Zanarkand. A lot of my friends would have turned their back on me if I were to ever have a bad day of blitzball, no doubt. But that was all in the past, I tell myself. Clear skies ahead.

 

Eigaar sat down next to me and started putting on his special blitzball boots he loved so much. He would only wear them during games; he said they made him feel like he had fins and they served as a good luck charm. I’d usually just laugh and shake my head. I had my own lucky necklace, the Zanarkand Abes logo, a crude looking heart that also served as one of Dad’s tattoos.

 

As he was putting on his boots Eigaar flashed me a strange grin. Like he was hiding something. “Guess who was in the crowd today.”

 

I shrugged. Probably some cute Al Bhed girl Eigaar was going to go talk to afterwards. My friend was a two-track man, blitzball and girls, always good for a laugh.

 

“I saw Rikku! She snuck out when she found out Cid went to Djose Temple. Well, I hardly call it sneaking when the only person you have to fool is Brother, she basically just left a note telling him she was out digging in the desert, he won’t realize she’s gone for another 10 days.”

 

My eyes shot up in surprise. “How’d she get here so fast? Our trip took 6 days…” Maybe he just thought he saw her?

 

“That’s because we took a stop to do some salvaging, remember? Anyways, she left 2 days ago and now she’s here. We saw her at the bar. She was asking for you…”

 

Eigaar jabbed me in the ribs at this. I shrugged it off, although I was sort of curious. “Where is she?” I replied, getting up.

 

“Hey, calm down man we’re playing in like half an hour. You don’t have time. Besides, if she came all the way out here just to see you I doubt she’ll go anywhere until she _gets to see you_.”

 

I frowned. “What makes you say that? She told me she had always wanted to go to Luca during tournament time. This has nothing to do with me.” My face turned a little red as I noticed the rest of the team had come to attention when they heard “Rikku” pop into our Spiran conversation. Moments like these made me glad my other teammates didn’t know much Spiran.

 

Eigaar laughed. “Yeah sure, she came to see blitzball, uh huh. Gaab dammehk ouincamv dryd.” With that my friend stood up and began a conversation with Lakkam. I decided to get ready for the game myself, ignoring Eigaar’s cocky glances.

 

_“keep telling yourself that”_

 

For the first time in my entire career, I began a game without my mind focused purely on blitzball.

 

[][]

[][]

 

The stadium was huge, although not as big as the Abes’ home stadium. We did a few warm-up drills as people began filing into the seats. After a while an announcer’s voice rang throughout the arena.

 

“Ladies and Gentlemen, the final match of the Opening Day tournament is now underway! Today we have the Luca Goers squaring off against the Al Bhed Psyches!”

 

The crowd cheered for the Goers then primarily booed at the sound of our name. It wasn’t the first time I had been booed; you should have heard when we played at the C-south Duggles’ stadium. But…this was the first time I wondered if they were booing me because I wasn’t on their team…or because they thought I was something they hated. _An Al Bhed._

 

Serious thoughts like these quickly fled my mind when I saw a certain someone walk through one of the entrances, accompanied by some other Al Bhed women. I could barely make her out but she was smiling, that was for sure.

 

“Tidus, muug uid!” shouted Lakkam. I turned just in time to see a blitzball fly right into my face. Ouch.

 

_Tidus! Look out!_

 

I swam after the blitzball, my face now slightly red. Good one, star player of the Zanarkand Abes, good one. Reaching the ball I passed it back to Lakkam, catching Eigaar doubled over laughing in the corner of my eye. Punk.

 

“And now ladies and gentlemen, let the games begin!”

 

[][]

[][]

 

We were slaughtered. Well, 5 to 2 wasn’t bad I guess, but for me it was. I made four attempts at goal and only got one shot in! Sure, with two of those I was robbed, but I should have been more heads up. I wonder what Rikku would say…

 

Of course, maybe that was my problem. I had a hard time concentrating knowing she was in the audience. I kept trying to sneak glances; most of which invariably left me vulnerable.

 

Afterwards we all sulkingly made our way to the locker room; heavy defeat laden steps as the crowd outside cheered for the Goers. We all sort of plopped down on the nearest bench and Eigaar began a ‘paddan milg haqd oayn’ speech. He was maybe mid way through when one of our guards came rushing in.

 

_‘Better luck next year’_

 

“Eigaar!” he exclaimed. “Drana yna rihtnatc uv fiends eh dra cdyteis!”

 

_There are hundreds of fiends in the stadium!_

 

“Fryd?!” Half the team yelled, including myself. Fiends in a blitzball stadium?

 

_What?!_

 

“Dra Crusaders yna nihhehk ynuiht mega syheylc, cruimt fa tu cusadrehk?” The guard asked, wondering if we should help them.

 

_The Crusaders are running around like maniacs, should we do something?_

 

Eigaar cleared his throat and made a decision I never quite understood. “Hu. Fa't uhmo syga dra cediydeuh funca…” He frowned, wiping a little sweat from the game off of his brow. “Fa fuimt kad hu dryhgc, hu knydedita. Uhmo lincac yht tendo kmyhlac.”

 

_No. We’ll only make the situation worse…We would get no thanks, no gratitude. Only curses and dirty glances._

 

My other teammates nodded their heads, their expressions similar to Eigaar’s.

 

I wanted to go fight…I wanted to help those outside. But when I remembered the jeers and scowls on the faces of those fans earlier…I got confused. All I could do was hang my head…and wonder if Rikku was okay.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original A/N: Oh, and as for the kidnapping of Yuna. Don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten about that. Just remember, Tidus was playing a blitzball game when it all happened. He still doesn’t know about who Yuna is at this point.


	5. Brotherly Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tidus wakes up in a medic room and overhears a conversation he probably wasn't supposed to hear...

“Oooh…wake up!” called a voice. I felt something cool on my stomach. It felt nice, it was moving in a circular motion.

 

“Tidus!” addressed the same voice, I was certain now it was Rikku.

 

I was too tired to respond, plus a headache pulsed every few seconds. My left arm hurt. A lot. My vision slowly came into focus, and I looked up to see Rikku facing the door. A rather perturbed Brother stood in the doorway.

 

I was lying on a bed of some sorts, I wasn’t sure where exactly but it looked like the medical room on an Al Bhed ship. I had been in one once before; it was that time a fiend took a big bite out of my right leg during a salvaging expedition. What was my reason for being here this time?

 

"Rikku...Kippal ec dygehk lyna uv res. Oui tuh'd ryja du tu drec...” came Brother, the perturbed look replaced by a worried one.

 

_Rikku… Kippal is taking care of him. You don't have to do this…_

 

Rikku didn’t respond to this. In my limited field of view I saw her sort of turn away from her sibling’s gaze.

 

Brother continued. “E tuh'd mega drec...oui cbaht duu silr desa fedr drec uidcetan…”

 

_I don't like this...you spend too much time with this outsider…_

Rikku’s head jerked up. She spat, “Uidcetan? Ra'c yc silr yh Al Bhed yc oui yh E! Oui ghuf drec! Ouin dra uha fru lymmc res 'Kevd'!”

 

_Outsider? He's as much an Al Bhed as you and I! You know this! You’re the one who calls him 'Kevd'_

 

Brother scowled. “Nakyntmacc, vydran ech'd kuehk du mega drec. Ra'c paah du Home, cruimth'd ryja dygah res drana fedruid vydran'c bansecceuh...”

 

_Regardless, father isn't going to like this. He's been to Home, shouldn't have taken him there without father's permission..._

 

His sister cut off eye contact. She looked away from him, suddenly interested in a machina located in the corner. I could only see her back and a bit of her right side, but it seemed like her shoulders dropped a little bit. “E ghuf...pid...mega oui cyet! Ra'c uin kevd, ra'c fryd'c kuehk du ramb ic payd Sin! Cyja Yunie!” she said, slowly and a bit too quiet for Rikku. I had heard this before, save for the ‘Yunie’ thing, but this time it seemed like Rikku was trying to convince herself that it was true.

 

_I know...but...like you said! He's our gift, he's what's going to help us beat Sin! Save Yunie!_

 

Brother kicked at an invisible object with his right foot. His words were also spoken in a very uncharacteristic way. “Dryd'c hud fro oui ryja paah rana vun ymm drnaa tyoc... E's hud pmeht Rikku…” His face grew contorted, like he couldn’t get the right words out. “Oui lyh damm Jekud yht sa…” he cleared his throat and looked up, “Oui lyh damm ajanouha fryd oui fyhd pid E ghuf dryd'c hud fro oui yna rana!” He spoke as though he had to force the words from his mouth.

 

_That's not why you have been here for all three days... I'm not blind Rikku… You can tell Jekud and me… You can tell everyone what you want but I know that's not why you are here!_

 

I wasn’t sure why he found this so hard to say. I, for one, had no idea what he was talking about. I understood what he said in Al Bhed, but the meaning left me. It must have been serious though, as Brother promptly left the room.

 

Rikku seemed to contemplate something, and then left the room to chase after him. I could only listen now.

 

“Tuh'd...tuh'd damm vydran! Bmayca Brother!” I heard her cry.

 

_Don't...don't tell father! Please Brother!_

 

A steely voice answered her. “Fryd ys E cibbucat du tu! Oui ghuf drec ec hud kuut! Vydran mad rec cecdan tea pid E femm hud mad seha!”

 

What am I supposed to do! You know this is not good! Father let his sister die but I will not let mine!

 

A pause, then Rikku’s footsteps could be heard retreating to my room. Figuring the conversation was over I stopped fighting the wave of fatigue that had hit me about halfway through their dialogue…

 

[][]

[][]

 

Kippal was the doctor on the Al Bhed ship I rode on the ride to Luca from Home. I had awoken apparently three days after the ‘incident in Luca’ as he liked to call it. I for one had no idea what he was talking about. The blitzball game? I don’t remember getting hurt in it. Just that embarrassing ball to the face during practice beforehand, but that was nothing serious.

 

Kippal started doing some kind of test with my left arm. It didn’t hurt as much anymore. “Doc, what exactly happened…in Luca, I mean. How did I hurt my shoulder and stomach…?”

 

Kippal, who always had a sort of laid-back attitude, just shrugged. “I’m going to go tell Rikku you just woke up. I finally got her to get some rest, but I know she’d hate me if I just let her sleep and you had been awake the whole time. She can give you all the details.” He sauntered out of the room, which I now could confirm to be the official medical room on C Deck, his body language relaxed and casual. How’d this guy get to be a doctor?

 

A few restless minutes later and a rather excited Rikku sprang at me straight out of nowhere. “Tidus!” she exclaimed, almost hugging me before she saw the bandage on my left arm and decided not to. “How long have you been awake?”

 

I laughed. “Hey, calm down! Only maybe 10 minutes or so… Kippal was just checking out my arm. Doesn’t hurt as bad as before.” I moved it a bit to demonstrate. I groaned. “Not exactly Blitz worthy material…”

 

Rikku smiled. “I’m just glad that you’re okay! What were you thinking? Taking on all those fiends!”

 

I frowned. What fiends? “Hey Rikku, about that. I don’t remember anything that happened…I was in the locker room…”

 

Rikku frowned disapprovingly. “Eigaar was so mad at you. You rushed out of the locker room and he ran after you. You ran right into the stadium and started fighting fiends. I saw you…”

 

As she spoke the memory of the event started to slowly come back. I could almost hear the irritating silence of the locker room. Finally, giving in to what I knew was right I had fled the room and went to fight for the innocent fans. I had saved a few people and killed a lot of fiends. Most were wolf-like, if I can remember. Then I remembered seeing Rikku, finishing off a fiend that had attacked her on the way out of the stadium. I turned to call out her name, she yelled and I looked behind me. A fiend launched itself onto my arm, and I fell down. It gnawed at my shoulder and stomach until a sword came down and sliced it in two. I blacked out.

 

“…and then…Sir Auron came and…” continued Rikku as I came back to reality.

 

“Sir Auron…?” My eyes widened. “Auron was there? He…was the one with the sword!”

 

Rikku nodded. “You DO remember. Sir Auron helped me take you here, to the ship. We’re on our way back to Home.”

 

I sat up, ignoring the pain that it caused. “Where is he? I need to talk to him!”

 

Rikku pressed me back onto the bed, gently. “Calm down…” she said softly. “He told us to meet him at Mushroom Rock…for operation Mi’ihen.”

 

I let myself be pushed back down. I didn’t know what operation Mi’ihen was, or where Mushroom Rock was for that matter, but I could ask later. I had other questions.

 

We sat and talked for a while, Rikku and I, like we usually did. She ate with me and she told me about how she snuck out of Home to go to Luca. We laughed about my less than stunning performance in the game. I felt like I was at Home again, messing around with my closest friend. Eventually we sort of just ran out of things to talk about, which was nothing new. Sometimes we would just sit around and stare at our surroundings until Rikku came up with another topic to begin _another_ huge spiral of questions and answers and questions and answers. Only, today was my turn.

 

“What did Brother mean?”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“When, you know, he said something like ‘Father let his sister die, but I won’t let mine’ or whatever. I didn’t get that. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Brother so upset.”

 

Rikku turned away, similar to what she had done to Brother earlier. “He was just…upset when he found I went to Luca.” She looked back at me. “He’s just a big overprotective meanie!”

 

“Rikku…” My mind had already hopped to another subject. “About what Brother said…do you think Cid will hate me?”

 

Rikku frowned. “What do you mean?”

 

“Brother… he said your father wouldn’t be happy…”

 

“He’s just…” She scratched her head, another very un-Rikku like manner, which made me feel a bit awkward. “It’s not you that he doesn’t like. Just…”

 

“…because I’m not Al Bhed?” I finished for her.

 

Rikku shook her head. “No…no…that’s not it. Like I said we wouldn’t have ways for someone to become Al Bhed if it weren’t possible! It’s…for other reasons…that’s why Brother is upset.”

 

“What other reasons?”

 

Rikku blushed, an interesting look for the usually unabashed Al Bhed. I didn’t know how to interpret its meaning, though. Her eyes gained a weird gleam. “Hey mister! Since when were you awake during that conversation? How did you hear us?”

 

I smiled sheepishly. “Sorry…I was…tired, I was sort of fading in and out of consciousness…” I explained…only half telling the truth. Was I really eavesdropping? I couldn’t really stop my ears from listening, but I probably could have made more of an effort to express to Rikku that I was awake. I didn’t really understand a thing about that conversation though. So, was it really that important? Whatever.

 

Rikku game me a playful punch on my shoulder. Luckily it was my right one; I had a feeling if it was the other I’d be crying right now.

 

“Look, Brother is still just a little wary about where your loyalties lie. I mean, I admire you for fighting those fiends; the only thing is you were saving some regular Spirans. Some people just found that funny. But I knew you were just trying to help.” Rikku flashed me a grin.

 

I smiled back, I’ve said it a million times and I’ll say it again, that smile is contagious. “Well, tell Brother I’m all Al Bhed. I don’t know where I’d be without you guys. And judging from some of the people at that game I don’t think I very much like the rest of Spira…or Yevon for that matter,” I commented. “No worries!”

 

“Yeah. No worries,” said my friend. Her eyes told me something different though. Rikku still wasn’t telling me everything…

 

“Father let his sister die, I won’t let mine.” Obviously I wasn’t going to kill her and Brother knew that. Was there something I was doing inadvertently to cause her harm? I felt like this had nothing to do with me…yet everything to do with me. Here I am injured and Kippal says I suffered a concussion...maybe I should just forget about it.

 

Well, for now anyways.


	6. Promise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tidus makes Rikku a promise.

 

My left arm was in a sling. It was broken, but with some advanced medical treatment from Doctor Kippal my blitzball days aren’t too far away. My left shoulder is operational, though it can still be severely painful at times. Along with my arm and shoulder I have an injury in my lower abdomen which now sports a rather large scar; one that probably won’t ever go away… I don’t mind though, I was just glad the fiend hadn’t ripped any of my organs right out.

 

My left arm proves to be a rather large handicap, I’m afraid. I can see my reflection in the blitzball pool as I sit on its ledge, my legs dangling in the cool water. There is a restless look on my face giving away my desire to just jump right in. My forehead has an agitated crease that reveals my frustration with the situation I’ve gotten myself into: I can’t get up.

 

I’ve tried a few different methods. I put all my support on my right arm and then I tried sort of sliding back and lifting myself up. That wasn’t any good: I hurt my left shoulder and ended up putting my left arm into an incredibly uncomfortable position. I tried sliding back to the bench on the side. Once I got there I could use the bench to hoist myself up. This didn’t work either, as I was tired and my right arm was in no mood to support my whole body. Yeah, I was stuck here with my legs in the pool. How the heck did I get into this position in the first place?

 

To be honest I can’t remember. I had been sitting here for maybe an hour? Half an hour? The problem was I was too busy thinking.

 

[][]

[][]

 

We’d been in Home for three days, eight days since I was in Luca. The boat trip was calm and it only took five days. Fortunately, there were no fiends that bothered us on the way. Since we got back I’ve sort of been settling into a new groove. Before Luca I had blitzball practice everyday and then I would help Brother and Jekud in the supply room full of ancient ‘mysterious’ machina. Now, however, Brother was busy preparing ‘Operation Mi’ihen’ and so naturally, that was what I was doing.

 

Everyone was impressed with me, like I was some sort of genius or something. I’m not a technological wizard, but we were working with basic stuff here. The main weapon of Operation Mi’ihen worked a lot like these toy guns that are in fashion with the kids back in Zanarkand. Except this weapon is a whole lot bigger.

 

I guess I was so impressive they assigned me to the basic weapons development. While I was sure to be a big help with the main weapon, the Al Bhed decided I couldn’t be trusted without Cid’s blessing. So, it was my job to work on the smaller stuff, the cannons and guns the Crusaders would use to distract Sin. I was content, knowing I was helping and all. Turns out Jekud is quite the engineer, he and I got started right away on better propulsion and automatic aiming systems.

 

I find that everyone looks up to me now. The “genius”, the great blitzball player, the funny guy. The guy who risked his life back in Luca to save innocent fans. I don’t mind the attention, after all what Blitzball player doesn’t love being in the spotlight? Still, sometimes I wish I could just relax and talk to my friends.

 

There weren’t too many elderly men and women in the Al Bhed tribe. It was said that if Sin hadn’t killed you, the desert…or worse yet the Yevonites would. But there were a few that made their way past it all. And one, whose name was Makken, often called me something I like: ‘Ra fru caac fedr Aoac Ihlmuitat.’ Jekud told me this means ‘He who sees with Eyes Unclouded.’ Not too many people knew I was not Al Bhed, only the people I worked with on the weapons. So most found it strange that I helped save the Yevonite people back in Luca. But afterwards they commended me, after all that’s what we were trying to attain. We wanted to destroy Sin to save all the people of Spira, not just the Al Bhed.

 

Anyways, today was my first break in a while. Jekud had some other stuff going on so we weren’t needed to do any development today. Operation Mi’ihen was growing closer and closer. Five days away…

 

In fact, the ship leaves tomorrow. I have to remember to say goodbye to Rikku…

 

[][]

[][]

 

“Sorry, but sitting here isn’t going to miraculously let you play blitzball again…”

 

I nearly jumped out of the water at this. In fact I wish I had, that would have gotten me out of my fix. Instead I turned to see Rikku plop herself alongside me. I hadn’t seen her in maybe two days. If I had forgotten how beautiful she was I was instantly reminded as the metallic light emanating from the room along with her reflection in the pool made it all too apparent.

 

“It took me forever to find you, you know! No one had any idea where you were…”

 

I nodded. “Its called privacy Rikku.” I said, half-joking with a smirk on my face. Privacy could be darned, I loved her company.

 

Rikku gave me a fake hurt look. “Fine, fine. I see how it is! I don’t see you for two days and now you don’t want to talk to me. Suit your self!” She got up and began heading to the door. I knew she was joking but the situation I was in caused me to panic.

 

“Rikku! Wait! Um…I’m stuck.”

 

She turned and gave me a funny look. “Huh?”

 

I rubbed the back of my neck. “Uh, well, I came here to think. So I just sat down here at the edge. But now…I can’t get back up…”

 

Rikku’s eyes widened and a grin slowly spread across her face. It wasn’t long before she burst out laughing.

 

“Hey! Are you going to help me or what?”

 

She nodded, still laughing. “Aw, poor crippled Tidus…” She made her way to me and after a few tries with Rikku trying to pull me up we somehow managed to make our way to one of the team benches, a few feet from the edge.

 

Rikku lightly jabbed my stomach. “You big lug!” she said. I noticed she made sure not to hit my lower abdomen, which of course would have been very painful.

 

I could only laugh; there wasn’t really any way to respond to that. Compared to Rikku, of course I was a big lug.

 

“So what have you been up to?” I began. What she said was true; I hadn’t seen her in two days.

 

“Same old, same old. Machina repair. Salvaging yesterday.” Rikku was a terrific mechanic. Her dad was the same way, Jekud said, when I had asked about it. Rikku and Brother could do amazing things with just a simple wrench. “What about you? Excited about tomorrow?”

 

I nodded. It was going to be cool to see my updated cannons in action. I had been briefed on the whole of Operation Mi’ihen. We were to lure Sin in; turn on the big machina and blast away. The only thing I was really nervous about was meeting Sin again. Ever since Auron and I had…gotten sucked up into that thing…well, I’ve had a few nightmares.

 

“Tidus?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Promise me you’ll be okay, okay? I mean, promise me you’ll come back…”

 

“Okay.” It was all I could do. I didn’t think of this operation as very dangerous, but it seemed she did.

 

“And…promise me you’ll come back to Home, okay?”

 

“Hm?” I didn’t get her question. Why wouldn’t I come back? What would I have done, ran off to some random place?

 

“Nevermind…”

 

I kicked my legs a bit, already missing the water. Rikku was sitting rather close to me; I could almost feel her warmth. It was sort of cold in this room. I really did miss her company. We sat quiet like this for a few minutes.

 

The newfound silence brought an old question to mind. “Rikku? You know how you had told me that a guy named Auron saved me?”

 

“Yeah…he was my uncle’s guardian. About 9 years ago he disappeared…when he showed up in Luca it was the first time anybody had seen him in a loooong time.”

 

“Guardian?”

 

“Didn’t I tell you? Uncle Braska became a summoner. After…my aunt died…When I was 5 years old he had brought the Calm…”

 

“I know…but Auron was his guardian?”

 

“Yeah. Why?”

 

“Remember my story? I knew an Auron in Zanarkand… What does this Sir Auron look like?”

 

Rikku pondered, scratched the side of her face. “Well, he’s wearing like all red. He doesn’t put his arm in one sleeve, but not because he doesn’t have an arm. He just tucks that one away for some reason. That’s all I can remember, really…”

 

“That’s him.” I said. I was positive now; it was the same Auron. I had to meet him. “You say he is going to be there, at Operation Mi’ihen?”

 

Rikku nodded, I noticed her expression was a little solemn. “He said he wanted us to make sure you were there. He wanted to meet with you I think. Something about Sin. He told me, “Tell him that it is time for his story. Tell him I know of Jecht…” she trailed off at this, probably distracted by the incredulous look on my face.

 

“Jecht…?” was all I could get out. I remembered the conversation Rikku and I had had…a long time ago… back when we had been watching the sunset. Could it really be the same Jecht?

 

Rikku was apparently on the same wavelength. “It could be him.” She frowned. “My cousin would know.”

 

“Your cousin?”

 

“Yuna…she’s a summoner now. She’s going to…kill herself just to save Spira a few years of peace…” Rikku’s eyes seemed to lose color for a second. “I hate it…that’s why Dad is planning to do something. Save the summoners…”

 

I knew what she was talking about. Brother had told me that the Al Bhed would do as much as they could to save the summoners. Even kidnapping if need be. Jekud told me they attempted to do so in Luca, during our first game, but some guardians had gotten in the way.

 

“But…how would your cousin know my dad?”

 

“Well, since he served as her father’s guardian, I’m sure they’ve met. When she was little. Ever since the Calm began so long ago, Jecht had never been seen again. But Yunie could probably tell you if it was the same man…”

 

I nodded. Made sense. “Where can I meet her?”

 

Rikku shrugged. “If Operation Mi’ihen is successful then all the summoners can go home. We can meet her then.”

 

I nodded; once again glad to be a part of the Operation that was going to save Spira. And perhaps it would give the world a better outlook on the Al Bhed.

 

Per usual we ran out of topics to talk about. I had done so much stuff in the past two days; all of which I now wanted to tell Rikku. But none of it seemed very appropriate. I decided to ask about Braska.

 

“Braska, was he a good guy? I mean, he knew my old man. Most people associated with the lug aren’t very nice people. But Braska doesn’t sound so bad.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Well, he wasn’t stupid enough to let prejudices get in the way. I mean, he married an Al Bhed. Isn’t that frowned upon?”

 

Rikku nodded, slowly. “He wasn’t brainwashed to Yevon. Well, not completely anyways. He did go on a pilgrimage, but unlike most summoners he respected us, the Al Bhed. I know he had taken a lot of bad criticism for having married an Al Bhed. No one expected him to beat Sin.”

 

“Is it really that bad?” I asked.

 

“Hmm?”

 

“To marry…to have an Al Bhed love a Yevonite…”

 

Rikku only nodded. I thought I saw a little red move onto her cheeks. “Just promise me you’ll come back…”

 

“Huh?” It was my turn to be confused.

 

“From operation Mi’ihen okay?”

 

“I promise.” I said, no wavering in my voice.

 

“Good. Now, I have to get back to work. Brother is being a pain in the butt today.” She got up and headed to the door. Turning she said, “Bye Mr. Cripple!”

 

It was the last thing I’d hear from Rikku, the last thing she said to me before I was sent into the world of Yevon.


	7. Chappu?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Operation Mi'ihen

 

I was hanging out behind our main machina weapon; my left arm again preventing me from doing any important jobs. The past few days I mostly assisted with the transportation of weapons off of our ship all the way to the top of Mushroom Rock. For the most part I was just taking care of some weak fiends with a few one handed slices of my sword.

 

It wasn’t just the Crusaders that had made it out for the Operation. There were some Yevonites and a Maester or two; at least that was what I was told. I wasn’t sure why, wasn’t Yevon against the use of machina? Besides, all these higher-ups seem to do is give evil glares at us Al Bhed, but then supporting looks to the Crusaders. It didn’t make much sense to me, then again a lot of Spira didn’t make sense in my opinion…

 

“Tidus!” Jekud ran up behind me, smiling like it was the best day of his life. “Can you believe it? Our cannons are working great! We’re finally going to defeat Sin…” he said, in Al Bhed. Our broken conversations from months ago we’re now gone, I had gotten a real grasp on the Al Bhed language. Basic conversation was easy.

 

I nodded at his comment. Our cannons we’re at the best possible conditions available under such tight time constraints. However, the main weapon is the reason I wasn’t smiling.

 

I should have fought to help them. I know I’m still not trusted completely but if they had given me a chance…I could have changed the large machina into something worth fearing. This was supposed to defeat Sin? The Sin that destroyed Zanarkand? There wasn’t a chance, but I at least hoped it would hurt Sin in some way. Perhaps we could fight him later with a more powerful weapon.

 

A large roar signaled the machina being turned on. To my ears it didn’t sound very good, but all my friends cheered. It was time…

 

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[][]

 

The ground shook. From the beach to the south of us, where the Crusaders waited, fiends in cages begin slashing and clawing. Then as we planned their cages are released. At that moment I looked out over the water; a giant shadow covers all that I can see. It rises, and I see Sin. This appropriately named giant hulking mass of destruction pauses and I hear a cry from one of the Crusaders. “Let’s go!”

 

Our cannons fired, all of them hitting their target. I see the men on big yellow chocobos go flying down the beach. But…when Sin is hit…his skin falls to the ocean and then transforms into an army of these jellyfish-like fiends. My mouth is wide as I watch Sin drop his outer skin made out of even more fiends. A large barrier of energy surrounds him. The barrier extends outwards, towards the Crusaders. The chocobos, along with men are fighting the fiends in the water. The barrier reaches them…

 

“Cred!” yells Jekud, as we witness everything being disintegrated, turned into particles. I hear men yelling as I take a few steps towards the ocean.

 

“Kad nayto! Kad nayto!” Who is that? I looked to my right to see Brother running towards the giant machina. I could recognize that voice anywhere.

 

In less than a few minutes the machina is powered up and ready to go. In the control area I can see a friend, Mekid, slam the energy blast button. My head turns in the direction of the laser; I watch as the huge energy beam hits Sin. The barrier holds. Cred. It begins to extend towards us. The machine shakes, it’s a matter of minutes before it explodes. Looking around I see that Jekud is gone. Where is he?

 

“Ahhhh! Cred! Cred!” cries Brother, to my right. A piece of the collapsing tower had hit him square in the chest.

 

Suddenly there is a voice in my head. _In the water, get in the water! Don’t cry…you always cry…_

 

“My old man?” I said aloud, half to myself. Whatever that was, it was right. I needed to get into the water. Adrenaline pulsing through my veins, I grabbed Brother and dragged him from underneath the fallen debris, a steel beam. How he was still alive I had no idea. My left arm was useless; my right arm was now somehow managing to carry both a nearly lifeless Brother and I into the ocean. I blacked out.

 

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[][]

 

I woke up with my face covered in sand. I rolled over as I began coughing water out from my lungs. Where was Brother? My surroundings told me I was on the south beach, where the Crusaders had once stood. How could this have gone so wrong?

 

“I see you’re still here.”

 

My head snapped to the direction of the voice. Looking up I saw a man dressed in red. He wore a pair of sunglasses; a large scar was over one eye. It was Auron. My response wasn’t very graceful, as all I could do was cough and hack. I wasn’t sure if it was because I nearly drowned or because of my surprise.

 

He continued, “Many stories ended here today…but…yours goes on, I see.”

 

“What?” I coughed. He walked a bit away and started a conversation with what looked like a Maester. His words echoed in his mind. Why was I still alive? My friends…Jekud…Mekid…and now even Brother?

 

_This is it. This is your story. It all begins here…_

 

The words come from my own memory. Who had said that? Auron, wasn’t it? I had begun there, back in Zanarkand. But where does it all end?

 

I sat up, the only thing I could do at this moment. My sling was broken; my left arm hung at my side in incredible pain. After a bit Auron returned. Before he got a word out, I just let everything I had kept bubbled inside; I let all the confusion and indecisiveness and all the fear and all the sadness get the best of me.

 

“You! It was you! You’re the one who started this all…you’re the reasons I’m here! Why did this have to happen! What is Sin? And how do you know my old man?!” I must have asked him about twenty questions before he responded.

 

Auron’s face held the neutral expression I had seen many a time in Zanarkand. “Sin is Jecht.” He said.

 

“What?”

 

“Sin is Jecht. Jecht is Sin.” He repeated.

 

It was…insane. It took my mind forever to grasp what he was saying. How can my dad be that…that thing? But…even as I said this I remembered the voice in my head. The way I had almost felt my old man’s stupid stare from behind…

 

“He came here for you.”

 

“What? Why?” What was he saying? Sin came all the way to this place…killed all these people…to see me? It seemed incredulous…but everything here in Spira was incredulous. The fact that I went from my city to a place one thousand years in the future is incredulous. Was it really that hard to believe?

 

“So…he killed all those people…just to see me?”

 

Auron nodded slightly. “That’s what Sin does. He wanted to show you that. Do you know why?”

 

I shook my head, no.

 

“So you would kill him. As long as he is Sin, Jecht will keep killing. He wants you to stop him.”

 

“You…you…how…how can I…how do you know all of this?” My mind raced from question to question.

 

Auron didn’t answer. His hand, which had been out of view until now, held a sort of bag or pack. He threw it at me, right into my chest, which elicited a groan.

 

“What gives?” I asked.

 

“Change into those. This is your story…Jecht would have wanted you to accompany Summoner Yuna. In order to do so you cannot look like an Al Bhed.”

 

He walked away before I could respond. I was supposed to accompany a summoner? My old man would have wanted me to? What the hell? Auron expects me to just drop everything and blindly follow him?

 

I looked along the beach, no sign of Brother. All around me the shore was just full of destruction. Who’s to say there were any survivors besides Auron and myself? At the moment I was helpless, afraid, and above all else confused. As desperately as I wanted to look for Brother, for Jekud and other survivors, I knew that I had to follow Auron. Auron was my only connection to Zanarkand…and he seemed to have all the answers.

 

Sighing, I hobbled over to an alcove on the shore. I quickly changed, switching my comfortable Al Bhed attire with a stiff Crusader uniform. I took off my goggles for the first time in what seemed like an eternity. I immediately closed my eyes as the brightness of the sun infiltrated one of my senses. I gave them a while to adjust, letting the goggles hang from my neck.

 

I walked back onto the open shore, seeing Auron and a group of other survivors. They all turned towards me as they heard me approach. Everyone’s jaw dropped with the exception of Auron.

 

I felt naked. I realized this must be what every Al Bhed feels like. Their goggles off, their green eyes with swirls open for the whole world to see and take notice. The sign of the heathens. However, my eyes were blue. Why did these people stare? I noticed there was one who looked like a blitz player for the Besaid Aurochs. He looked as if he saw a ghost.

 

“Chappu…” he muttered. “Chappu…is…is…is this a trick of the pyreflies?” he asked, in a heavy island accent.

 

The woman, dressed all in black, had a similar expression.

 

Auron turned to face me. “He is the son of Jecht, Tidus. He wishes to accompany the summoner as a guardian.” Auron looked at the other girl, dressed in a robe and holding onto a staff. She must be the summoner he was talking about. And this must be the group of guardians, then.

 

“The son of Sir Jecht?” She asked. Auron nodded. “I would be honored to have him as a guardian. Especially a Crusader who fought so bravely today.”

 

Crusader? Oh, she meant me. I forgot about these clothes. The girl, who I now assume to be Yuna, turned towards me and did the old blitzball cheer sign. Her hands formed into a circle, and then a bow. Did she know I played blitzball? Was it a reference to how my old man was a blitzball player?

 

I decided to mimic her action, hoping that it was appropriate. I didn’t get any funny looks so I figured it must have been suitable.

 

A big blue thing, which must be one of those Ronsos that Jekud had told me about, came walking forward. He looked me up and down then put himself behind Yuna. Another guardian maybe?

 

The tall man, the Auroch player, extended a hand. I shook it and he smiled. “The name’s Wakka, ya?”

 

The woman at his left, dressed all in black, smiled also. “My name is Lulu. It’s nice to meet you.” I don’t know what it is, but her blood red eyes told me she had a lot of experience with events like this. She was strong.

 

Yuna smiled again. I decided I liked her smile. It reminded me of Rikku. Rikku…was I ever going to see her again? I don’t have time to further ponder the thought as Yuna begins to speak. “Tidus…Sir Jecht was a great man. He was gentle, always kind to me.”

 

I gave her a funny look. “My old man? That doesn’t sound like him. He was always…rather hard on me.” I decided to just dismiss the comment with this. I really didn’t feel like talking about my father right now. There were too many questions.

 

Wakka stretched a hand the north. “We’re on our way to Djose Temple. The fiends there are somewhat difficult, we could always use an extra hand.”

 

I nodded. Me, a guardian? This was going to be…interesting.

 

[][]

[][]

 

The Ronso began walking north, and soon we all followed. I stayed near the end, with Auron. He didn’t seem like the guy to talk, so I didn’t force him. But perhaps he’ll begin to answer some of my questions.

 

I left Operation Mi’ihen behind. I took one last look, right in time to see an Al Bhed run across the beach. Jekud? Brother? A shot of panic ran through me. I can still turn back and rejoin the Al Bhed…

 

“Let’s go.” Auron’s voice interrupted my thoughts and prodded me forward, as we headed to the Djose Highroad.

 


	8. A New Look On Death

“I beg your pardon, but may I ask your name?”

Yuna nodded. “I am summoner Yuna, from the isle of Besaid.”

The questioning man smiled. “As I thought! The daughter of Lord Braska. You have the look of your father.”

Yuna’s eyes widened. “My father? You knew him?”

“No, I have never met the man.” He frowned. “Ah, my apologies, my name is Isaaru. I am a summoner, like you.”

A boy next to Isaaru spoke up. “I’m Pacce, pleased to me you.”

The other man accompanying Isaaru also spoke. “And I’m Maroda. I’m guarding my big brother here.”

Yuna bowed slightly to both, and then redirected her attention to Isaaru.

“Since I was a child, I’ve always looked up to Lord Braska. I wished I would someday become a high summoner like he was.” Isaaru commented. “You must have some of your father’s talents in you! I believe you might someday defeat Sin.”

Yuna stammered slightly. “I…I’m not really…I’ve only just become a summoner…”

“Of course, I have no intention of losing, either…so perhaps we should race to see who can defeat Sin first, no?”

Yuna had smiled slightly. It reminded me of one of Rikku’s many smiles…

“Very well, then. I accept your challenge.”

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[][]

I had watched this scene without saying a word. It had started off as a normal introduction between two strangers. But…when it ended, I had a sick feeling in my stomach.

It was nothing personal; after all I have only known Yuna for about a week. But it was just the idea, the principle of the thing that two human beings were discussing ‘racing’ to their deaths. Like it was some sort of game.

The Al Bhed were adamant about keeping the Summoners from their pilgrimages. At Home I was rather neutral in opinion and my mind would often battle between two viewpoints. Yes, the summoners defeated Sin and brought the Calm. However, despite their sacrifice Sin always returns. I was leaning a bit towards the Al Bhed side, but I think it is obvious that I had a pretty strong bias. Still, I tried to stay neutral after all back when I was at Home I had yet to meet any Summoners or Yevonites.

Now, though, I was disgusted. Whether or not it was wrong of the summoners to sacrifice themselves for their people, I still don’t know. But ‘racing’ one another, making it a contest? That was just horrible…and I felt sick.

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[][]

I think Operation Mi’ihen changed me. The only person I knew in Zanarkand to die was my old man, when he got lost at sea 10 years ago. But…I had never seen his body and let’s face it; I wasn’t really saddened by the loss. I hadn’t even cried. No other people I knew in Zanarkand had ever died. My friends sometimes did stupid stuff and got hurt, but nobody close to me besides my old man had ever been killed.

About a week ago, I had seen my friends, people I had spent with at Home, all die. I still don’t know if Brother made it out okay and I still find myself wide awake at night going over every detail of that day. I had just left without checking on Brother or anyone else. Maybe some of them had survived and were in need of help… I was distracted, yes, and my mind was shock, but I still didn’t have to follow Auron just then. I should have at least…checked to see who was alive…

Operation Mi’ihen had changed me. When you survive something like what I just came through… death becomes more real to you. Friendships and relationships grow more important to you. And the brain washing teachings of a religion become less than tolerable.

[][]  
[][]

I kept this way the entire day. Silent, I guess sort of broody. When Yuna took a break from healing wounded Crusaders and summoning the dead, she came and sat down next to me. I was sitting in one of the rooms of the temple, just thinking. We were alone.

“What’s wrong?”

Yuna was like Rikku. She could read me like a book. Then again, I was not the silent type and after only a week of travelling together, anyone could have noticed I was acting distant, stand-offish.

I lowered my head. I had secret after secret piled up inside me, and now that I had heard the conversation between Yuna and Isaaru my head just felt heavy.

“Tidus…are you alright?” Yuna extended a hand towards me, thinking I was ill. She must be trying to heal me.

I gently pushed her hand away. “I’m fine, don’t worry.”

Yuna sat back against the wall I was leaning on. “Something is upsetting you…” she said, quietly.

I missed being able to tell people my problems. Rikku was always free to listen, if I ever had a question or idea she’d always have an answer or comment. But there was only so much I could tell Yuna. She wouldn’t believe me about Zanarkand, she wouldn’t understand my relationship with the Al Bhed…

“I…when you were talking to Isaaru…”

Yuna gave me her full attention.

“Did you…is it really a race to you?” When I received a confused look from Yuna in reply I attempted to clarify. “Is it a contest…to see who will beat Sin first? Throwing your life away in a race to death…”

I half said these words to myself, voicing my thoughts for my own ears. I was a little surprised when Yuna responded.

“It…it helps.” Her eyes looked saddened. “When…you know what you are going to do…keeping your head up and challenging yourself…it’s a way to keep moving forward. I think this is what Isaaru wanted…and I would have felt bad denying him his own way of comfort.”

Was she saying she didn’t agree with Isaaru’s thinking? Her agreement was done in the hopes it might support Issaru’s own pilgrimage?

“You…don’t agree with his thinking.” I said, more of a comment than a question.

Yuna raised her head. “Well, I’m not sure. I want to be the one to defeat Sin, especially over people like Dona.” Dona was the obnoxious summoner we had run into before Yuna had acquired the aeon here at Djose Temple. “But I know it is foolish…acting like we are racing to Zanarkand, when we are really going to die…”

I couldn’t keep the question in anymore. “Why? Why do you do this…Sin just…he keeps coming back!”

Yuna smiled, it was weak and I could tell it was forced. “The Calm…gives everyone time to spend with their loved ones. It…isn’t forever, but it is worth it.” She lowers her eyes and her voice drops to almost a whisper. “Don’t tell me it isn’t worth it…”

I feel my own hand form itself into a fist as I recall the evens of Operation Mi’ihen. “Some of my comrades…they died last week, you know? I saw people disintegrate, be killed by explosions. But you know, if you counted all the people that died on that beach…it doesn’t even compare to the amount of Summoners that have died in the past hundreds of years…Most of them hadn’t even defeated Sin…they just died on the way.”

Yuna only responded with silence.

I gave a tormented sigh. “I don’t mean…to make you feel sorry for becoming a summoner…it’s just that…well…I don’t want another one to die. And I keep thinking…I’m your guardian right? So, I have agreed to protect you. But…aren’t I really just helping you on your way to death?”

Yuna touched my fist with her hand. “Thank you…I…you have helped me a lot.”

“What did I do?”

Yuna smiled, and this time I could really tell it was genuine. Not a full smile, but real. “I’m going to go defeat Sin…for people like you. Who have seen too much death…just…too much death…”

I decided right here and now that I could trust her…well…with most things.

“Yuna?”

“Hm?”

“A few months ago…I…was rescued by some Al Bhed…” Yuna removed her hand from where it covered my own. I wondered if this was a bad sign. Was she also an Al Bhed hater? “…and well, they took me in. I was lost, and confused. And they accepted me…and I…well, I’m not a crusader.”

Yuna nodded at this. “I know.”

“Huh?”

She smiled that genuine smile once again. “No Crusader I know wears goggles. And your haircut is very…unusual for a soldier. I also see the way you respond to Wakka sometimes, when Wakka is being…stubborn.”

I felt a burden lift off of my shoulders and the tension in my body dissipates, slightly. “And you don’t mind?”

“Well, it’s a little strange. But I shouldn’t talk…I am half-Al Bhed myself…Do you know a man named Cid?”

I shook my head. “No…well…sort of. I’ve heard of him. Never got to meet him. I’m…friends with his daughter though…”

Yuna looked down at the floor for a moment. “…is her name…Rikki? Rikku?”

I nodded, “Yeah, it’s Rikku. How did you…?”

“Well…Cid is my uncle. My mother was Al Bhed…”

My eyes widened. “You…you’re Rikku’s cousin?” Memories of the name ‘Yunie’ sprung to mind. “I think she has mentioned you before. Do you know her?”

Yuna shook her head. “I had met her when I was younger. I’ve seen her occasionally throughout the years. I haven’t seen her in a long time…”

I nodded at this. High summoners’ daughter was probably not encouraged to speak to any Al Bhed. It was obvious that her relationship to the Al Bhed was kept a secret.

Yuna stood up while I was still thinking. “I have to go…continue helping the wounded. Thank you…for talking with me…” She paused. “Could you…not tell Wakka? He might not…understand.”

I nodded. “As long as you keep my secret a secret,” I replied, with a smile.

Yuna nodded, gratefully. She bowed slightly, then left me to my thoughts.

[][]  
[][]

Talking with Yuna had made me miss Home. It made me miss Rikku especially, now that I know she and Yuna is related. Maybe I could convince Yuna to stop her pilgrimage... Auron never gave any details, but Zanarkand seemed a while off so I know there is some time.

Going with Auron was a mistake. I know it now, I can admit it. But, perhaps I can help the Al Bhed with what they had wanted to do in the first place. Stop the summoners from sacrificing themselves. I owe it to Rikku, for breaking my promise.


	9. Quick Decisions

“Don’t forget to put out the fire, Wakka.”

Lulu said it every night on our travels, before she went to bed. Tonight was not an exception, and as she stood up her command was replied to by a grunt from both Wakka and I.

“Yeah, yeah I know. Don’t have to remind me every night, ya know?” Wakka added, rubbing the back of his head. “Not a baby ya know…”

Lulu gave a very slight grin in reply, then retreated to the tent she and Yuna shared. The young summoner was usually the first to go to bed, and thus was already fast asleep. Everyone knew the stress she was under, and we were all doing our best to help her out in any way possible. I didn’t know what to do besides always keep a happy face and attitude, but at least I think I can do it well.

It helped me when I focused on Yuna and the others. Focused on being a guardian. This way I didn’t have to think about Zanarkand, other than that we would eventually get there. And I didn’t have to think about…someone else…

“Hey, Tidus, can I talk to you?” Wakka’s question broke my thought, and I turned to look at a very intense face. Usually Wakka’s a laid back kind of guy, so I was a bit curious as to what he had to say.

“I uh…you…uh…did…I ever tell you about Chappu?”

I remembered the name; I think Wakka had said it before. Lulu had mentioned this person before also, but I don’t remember any specific details on the matter. I shook my head.

“He…was my brother. He was a crusader too, ya? Maybe you knew him?”

I shook my head no, suddenly saddened that I wasn’t really a crusader at all. I wasn’t much of a liar back home; I never felt any need to be one. Living a façade like I was now…it wasn’t me, and it was uncomfortable.

“Oh…well…he died a…few years back…” Wakka coughed, shook his head. “He died using…some damn Al Bhed machina…ya know? And well…I had given him this sword…”

Wakka pulled out a sword, almost out of nowhere, and laid it on his lap. It was a light blue, like the water, a beautiful piece of work. He handled it carefully, I could tell it meant a lot to him.

“…but he didn’t take it with him. When…we reach…Macalania Woods…I was gonna go find where they buried him…and you know…lie it by his grave or something. I dunno…I guess it’s kinda dumb. But, you remind me a lot of him. And I was thinking…that sword you have ain’t that great and maybe you’d…ya know…want to have this…?”

My eyes sprung open at his suggestion. He was right; my old man’s sword was not in the best shape. Worse yet, it reminded me of Jecht. I contemplated how to respond to Wakka’s gesture. I’m…Al Bhed, something he hates and probably his brother hated as well. But if I refused his offer, without explanation, wouldn’t that just hurt him more?

“Wakka… I uh… I don’t know what to say. But I would absolutely want to have this!” I said, making up my mind. I reached for the sword, but not before Wakka got me in his famous headlock.

“You better take good care of it, ya hear?”

I laughed, shrugged the big guy off me. “Yeah yeah. I’d worry about how you take care of the old blitzball of yours, seems to have lost a little air!”

I picked it up and spun it on my finger, a little trick I’d sometimes do to past time while waiting for a game or practice to start.

Wakka only chuckled, probably wishing he could be as good as me, and stood up. I helped him put out the fire and we both made our way into the tent we shared.

Before I followed after my friend I took another look at the sword in my hand. Wakka wasn’t a bad guy, even though he was an Al Bhed hater. I think I see now why the Al Bhed insist on saving everyone, not just themselves. The people of Spira…may hate the Al Bhed…but they are good people. Just…confused. 

But I shouldn’t be talking. I’m the most confused of all. Do I want to go home, really? Or am I starting to enjoy the friendship I’ve found here…Rikku, Brother, Jekud, Eigaar, and now Wakka. 

And why the ramm am I thinking so much about all this? I need sleep.

[][]  
[][]

The next day we reached the banks of Moonflow. Besides the dinosaur-elephant hybrids they called ‘shoopufs,’ the place didn’t really have anything of interest. It was a brief stay; Yuna proceeded to fend off a group of fans with autographs and handshakes while the rest of us waited for the next crossing.

Yuna had wanted to see the Moonflow at night; it was supposedly a very beautiful sight. Auron wouldn’t let us stay; apparently a night’s rest was too much too spare. Sometimes I think that man has no heart. She’ll never have a chance to see it again, right?

As I pondered over this it became time to (finally) get onto the shoopuf and we started heading across the river.

“Hey, take a look.” Wakka motioned to the water the shoopuf was now trudging through.

I did as I was told, and was surprised to see a sort of sunken city floating below us.

“A machina city—a thousand years old!” Wakka exclaimed. “They built the city on top of bridges over the river.”

Lulu chimed in, “But the weight of the city caused the bridges to collapse, and it all sank to the bottom…”

“Right. It’s a good lesson, ya?” Wakka nodded.

“A good lesson?” I asked.

“Yeah. Why build a city over water, ya?”

I thought about it for a moment. A city over a bridge wouldn’t need a very complex, or expensive, water supply system. Made sense to me.

“It would be…convenient. With all this water here.”

Wakka shook his head. “Nope, that's not why…They just wanted to prove they could defy the laws of nature!"

I cocked my head sideways. “Eh…I’m not so sure about that.”

“Yevon has taught us: When humans have power, they seek to use it. If you don't stop them, they go too far, ya?” Wakka nodded, agreeing with his own quote.

I shook my head. Another mindless teaching covers the truth. Why would someone build a city just to ‘build a city’?

We talked a little more about machina, how Yevon’s teachings allowed the use of ‘certain kinds’ like the machina used to power the Blitzball stadiums. But the weapons like guns, or cannons…those were ‘bad machina.’ What, did Yevon write all this stuff down? The Al Bhed used the ‘bad machina’ and the Yevon followers used ‘good machina’? Well…anyways, after a while, we fell to silence.

[][]  
[][]

What happened next was almost like we were moving in slow motion…

The cabin on top of our shoopuf shook violently and then Hypello driver yelled out something I couldn’t hear. Yuna sprung up, her actions followed by Auron yelling at her to sit back down. I looked at the water, trying to find the source of the shaking…

I heard a muffled yell, and I spun around instinctively to see an Al Bhed friend from Home…his name was Tekel…grab Yuna and fall back into the ocean. I jumped and ran to the edge of the platform we were riding on. Wakka yelled something, and before I knew it we were both in the water…swimming.

I guess it was the sting of the water, but as my face hit the cold surface I realized what was happening. The Al Bhed were kidnapping my summoner. But they weren’t going to hurt her…they were just stopping her from going on her pilgrimage. I should just let them take her, right?

Wakka and I swam towards a large machine, which now held Yuna captive in a sort of field of energy.

I found myself making some quick decisions.

This machine was Al Bhed, operated by Tekel no doubt. I knew that if I let them take Yuna away, she would be safe. She wouldn’t have to die. But…I also thought…that Yuna had to decide for herself. Forcing her wasn’t going to get us anywhere. And…what could I do? Wakka was right there…if I didn’t fight, he’d know something was up. I couldn’t blow my cover.

I looked at the sword he gave me, shining blue in the darker blue of the river water. I had to fight. But, just enough to get Yuna back. I didn’t want to hurt Tekel.

Wakka pointed aggressively at the machine, and I did something I didn’t want to do.

[][]  
[][]

Wakka and I made a powerful team; it wasn’t long before we had Yuna back on the shoopuf. She was fine of course; the Al Bhed wouldn’t ever do her any harm.

Meanwhile, Wakka proceeded to curse the Al Bhed. I ignored him the best I could, focusing on the water, hoping I could see Tekel swim safe away…the machine had ended up blowing up. But it was under water…so he should be okay…

We made it to shore, and Wakka continued his cursing. “Damn the Al Bhed! What do they want from us? Could it have something to do with Luca? What are they after Yuna for? Wait! They're mad they lost the tournament! Or, wait! They're mad about Operation Mi'ihen!" He babbled on and on just like this.

"I wonder...Didn't Kimahri's clansmen say something...about summoners...disappearing?" Lulu said, trying to calm Wakka down, in her own way.

"Ah! So the Al Bhed are behind that! Those sand-blasted grease monkeys!"

“Wakka…” I said through clenched teeth. “It's no use complaining about the Al Bhed now, right? We'll protect Yuna from anyone, anywhere. It's that easy. That's all I need to know!" I finished my little paragraph with a smile, although inside I was having a tough time ignoring my new friend’s insults. He didn’t have any right…

My words had made him pause. “Yah…I guess so…”

I saw Yuna in the corner of my eye. She silently mouth the words ‘Thank you.’

[][]  
[][]

Auron didn’t let us stay at Moonflow long, and we continued down the road. It was a full days walk to Guadosalam, and he wanted to be there by the next morning. It’s like the guy isn’t human…this isn’t natural! No one should have to travel, especially after a fight with a machine like that.

In fact, he planned staying only one night on the road, which of course meant we had to walk fast. I was a bit tired, but all I could was trust that Auron knows what he is doing. He certainly acts like he does.

So, as we headed down the road I decided to walk a bit in front of the rest of the group. Wakka had regained some energy and began yapping about the Al Bhed again. I was nearing my snapping point, being as tired as I was, so I decided it best if I put him out of easy hearing range.

I reached a bend in the road, and when I went around it I was glad to find that for a moment, I couldn’t hear my friend’s voice at all. I took a deep breath, letting the moment sink in.

It was then…that I saw her.

[][]  
[][]

It was…it was…it couldn’t be…it was…

She moved. I stood, frozen. A minute went by before I realized I wasn’t breathing, I was too busy watching my friend clumsily stand up.

The Al Bhed girl was disorientated; it looked like her arm was hurt. She quickly discarded the salvaging suit she was wearing and stood wearing her normal Al Bhed clothes, clutching her hand to her forehead.

“Owie…” she said.

It was her. It was Rikku. It was Rikku…

It was Rikku.

She finally looked at me; I breathed in for the third time. She gave me a puzzled look, and I found that I could move again.

I threw my stupid Crusader headgear onto the ground, watched as her eyes slowly widened, jaw fell.

I took a step forward, a surge of emotions pouring through me. Not a day had gone that I didn’t think of Home or my Al Bhed friends. Maybe it was standing there, staring at her, that I realized something really obvious. Not a day had gone by that I didn’t think of Rikku.

“Tidus…” she said, her eyes still wide… “Is it…”

I nodded, regaining my ability to speak. “Rikku…you…”

Before I knew it she had her arms wrapped around my neck, and after a moment of surprise, I embraced her in a hug.


	10. Moonflow, Sunflow

 

 

We stood in that embrace for a mere second in my mind, although it was probably much longer. It probably felt so short because after nearly no time at all I heard the footsteps of my fellow travelers approaching.

 

As Rikku and I pulled away quickly, the others rounded the bend and came into full view.

 

“Yo!” Wakka cried, spotting us. “Friend of yours?”

 

My mouth opened and tried to find a way to answer, but no words came out. Rikku just appeared out of nowhere…and now mixed in with my excitement was a feeling of dread. She could easily blow my cover; _I_ could easily blow _our_ cover by saying the wrong thing. Instead of focusing on the discovery of the girl beside me, my mind had to work at light speed in order to figure out a way out of the predicament I was now in.

 

Luckily, I was quickly reminded that the same girl next too me also possessed a mind, and apparently it could also work at a ridiculously high speed.

 

“Pleased to meet you! I’m Rikku!” She exclaimed, beaming.

 

“Yeah…she…uh…we…I…” I stammered.

 

Rikku smiled again. “I met Tidus after he had a run in with Sin. Had was in a bad state of affairs, but me and my brother brought him to Luca…”

 

Wakka looked at me at this. I only could stare wide-eyed and think about how lucky I was that Rikku was quick to catch on to things.

 

“Wow, so you like, owe her your life!” He said, interrupting Rikku. “What luck meeting here, ya? Praise be to Yevon!”

 

Our friend did the prayer gesture, the one that looks like the old blitzball cheer. In the corner of my eye I saw Yuna whisper something to Lulu.

 

Lulu nodded and interrupted Wakka as he said something about Rikku looking a little beat up. “Uh…Wakka…”

 

“Huh, wha?”

 

Yuna took a step towards Rikku. “There is…something we need to discuss…”

 

I saw Rikku’s eyes widen as she recognized her cousin, our eyes met for a quick second and then she spoke to Wakka. “Uh…girls only! Boys not allowed!” She said, in a rather singsong voice.

 

Lulu nodded. “Right. Sorry, Wakka.”

 

Wakka was simply confused. The three ‘girls’ made their way a good distance from us ‘boys’ which consisted of Wakka, Auron, Kimahri and I. The two latter stuck to their usual stoic ways as me and Wakka took a seat in close proximity to the riverbank.

 

“So how long you know this girl?”

 

“Huh?”

 

“I said, how long you know her, man. You okay Tidus?”

 

I shook my head; desperately wishing that would help me think more clearly. “Yeah…I’m…I’m okay…I uh…I’ve known her for maybe 3 or 4 months…”

 

“Saved your life huh? How’d that happen?”

 

“Uh…well…”

 

Before I had to answer Wakka’s rather difficult question, the others returned.

 

Yuna spoke up. “Sir Auron…I would like Rikku to be my guardian.”

 

I nearly fell over, as I was in the process of standing up. I expected Rikku to catch up with Yuna in some way, and they had left because they didn’t want Wakka to know Yuna was part Al-Bhed. I didn’t really know where we’d go from there; this was all rather spontaneous. But the _last_ thing I expected to hear was what Yuna just said.

 

Auron responded by walking up to Rikku, which she reacted to by lowering her head.

 

“…show me your face.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“Look at me.”

 

I panicked. Did Auron know she was Al Bhed? Was he just trying to confirm by seeing her eyes? Would he let her be a guardian? Why did Rikku want to become a guardian anyways?

 

Rikku looked up, her eyes closed.

 

“Open your eyes.”

 

My friend slowly opened one eye, showing Auron what I figure he knew all along.

 

He grunted. “As I thought.”

 

Rikku frowned. “So…no good…”

 

Auron looked at her pensively. “Are you certain?”

 

“100 percent!” She exclaimed. “ …So…can I?”

 

“If Yuna wishes it.”

 

The summoner nodded emphatically. “Yes, I do!”

 

Wakka beamed. “Well, I’m all for it! The more the merrier!”

 

I breathed a sigh of relief. My head was still full of questions, however.

 

[][]

[][]

 

Auron decided that since we had already stopped we might as well set up camp where we were. As the moon began to rise we set up our usual travelling tents; Rikku was to stay in Yuna and Lulu’s tent. Then we ate a quick dinner, after setting up the fire.

 

Yuna and Rikku talked a little more, Wakka asked her a few (luckily non-personal) questions, and everyone conversed as usual.

 

Well, except me. I must have been dead silent, and I found it really hard not to keep a steady gaze on Rikku the entire time. There was so much I had to ask her, to tell her, to say I was sorry for. But I couldn’t, not in front of everyone like this, and it was driving me insane.

 

I quickly excused myself, making my way towards where I first saw Rikku. I needed to clear my head again. This bank of the Moonflow didn’t seem to have the ‘magical sight’ that the other possessed; however the view was beautiful enough. The blitzball constellation was out tonight, my favorite one.

 

I sat alone for a few minutes, contemplating how I could get Rikku away from the others so I could finally talk to her. Then I heard footsteps.

 

[][]

[][]

 

I turned to find myself in another hug similar to the one before. Then she began to hit me.

 

I didn’t even flinch. She had every right. Every right.

 

She stopped after a while, then buried her face in my shoulder, crying.

 

“E druikrd oui fana tayt...E druikrd oui fana tayt…” she said. My Al Bhed was a little stale at this point, and the fact that her voice was muffled didn’t help, but I still easily got what she was saying.

 

_I thought you were dead...I thought you were dead_

 

She thought I was dead.

 

It makes sense now, really. None of the other Al Bhed must have seen me leave Mushroom Rock. So many had died that day…it only made sense…

 

“Brother mejat...yht oui teat...yht ra druikr oui teat cyjehk res... ra nasaspanat dryd...yht fa...E...” she continued. “Oui pnuga ouin bnuseca...”

 

_Brother lived...and you died...and he though you died saving him... he remembered that...and we...I..._

 

I had broken my promise. “E's cunno, E's cunno. E cruimt ryja...E cruimt ryja vuiht Brother, E cruimt ryja vuiht Jekud un cusaputo...”

 

_I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I should have...I should have found Brother, I should have found Jekud or somebody..._

 

Rikku pulled away and looked at me, still crying.

 

“Jekud died…he…they found him right…under the machina…”

 

The world stopped for a moment as her words took on meaning. Suddenly my head felt light and I could barely stand up. No one close to me had ever died. Ever. My father died, but I wouldn’t call us close by any means. This invited a new feeling…even stronger then the one I had had at Djose. The only connection I had with the others who died was that fact that they were Al Bhed. I felt indebted. The Crusaders…well…I felt bad because they had died trying to save their friends and comrades. But this…this was an entirely new feeling…

 

Rikku wiped her eyes. “Brother came home. He remember you saving him by bringing him into the water…he…he told my father.” She shook her head. “And then Vydran told him that if you were still alive…he would owe you one…you could have…”

 

I finished her sentence in my own mind: _I could have become an Al Bhed_. I was both overjoyed and extremely saddened by this. Could have, would have… I think I hate those words now.

 

For the first time since our reunion I was the one initiate an embrace. I took my friend and hugged her as close as possible. A small pain shot up through my not-quite-healed left arm, but I ignored it. I had made so many mistakes and so many stupid choices…

 

“Rikku…” I said, trying to keep my voice steady. “I…I…did you see Auron?” She nodded. “I met him at Mushroom Rock…and he told me he would take me to Zanarkand…” I cleared my throat. “And I wanted to go home so bad…I just…everything else left my mind…I just followed him…”

 

I let go of my friend and took a seat on the edge of the bank. “I miss my home…but as we went along…I missed Home too. I mean, the Al Bhed Home. And this whole time…I went by thinking I’d never be able to go back again…I missed it…I love it there…”

 

Rikku had taken a seat next to me. Her arm gently latching on to my left. Somehow I knew this was on purpose, she remembered my broken arm. It made another new surge of emotions whirl up inside me.

 

“Rikku…I…I…missed you…I mean…I…I…look at Zanarkand…there is nobody there I truly miss.” I continued talking at a rapid pace, subconsciously hoping that if I spoke fast I could get everything without complication. “I missed blitzball…I missed the serenity I guess…the peace….but now I know what is like to miss somebody. An actual person. I…you…” Despite my efforts I still stuttered.

 

Rikku looked at the water for a second, then at me. “I…missed you too.” She said, slowly but firmly. Like she was fighting herself. “I…”

 

A laugh, sounded like Wakka’s, was heard from the campfire a ways behind us, making me turn around. When I looked back Rikku’s regular expression was there, the soft smile and eyes that seemed happy but still contemplative. Like she was just sitting back and taking in all the great things in world. I had missed that too.

 

“Rikku…” I started, not sure where I was going with it. “…you…why did you want to become Yuna’s guardian?”

 

She laughed slightly. “I was going to ask you the same thing…”

 

This elicited a similar laugh from me. “Yeah…well…you know how her father was a summoner…I mean of course you do, your uncle.”

 

Rikku nodded. I rubbed the back of my head.

 

“Well…Auron…he…he was one of your uncle’s guardians right? And he says that the same Jecht that was Braska’s guardian is the same Jecht…you know…my dad. He told me something else…kind of…surprising…”

 

_Sin is Jecht. Jecht is Sin._

 

“He told me…”

 

_So he killed all those people…just to see me?_

_That’s what Sin does. He wanted to show you that. Do you know why?_

 

“…that my old man is Sin. He told me…”

 

_So you would kill him. As long as he is Sin, Jecht will keep killing. He wants you to stop him._

“..that my old man came that day to see me…I know this sounds just…weird but…he told me that my old man wants me to kill him, to stop him…”

 

There was a silence for a moment. I could tell Rikku was thinking hard, she did this whenever I told her other stuff that was just as…incredulous.

 

“How can your father be Sin?” she asked, not in an unbelieving way but rather a curious one.

 

“I have no idea. I don’t even know if Auron is telling the truth or not. How could I? I shouldn’t be here…I should be helping you guys…I should be becoming an Al Bhed right now…”

 

Rikku didn’t respond at first to my outbreak. Granted it was sudden and very girlish of me…

 

“Tidus.”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“You already are Al Bhed.”

 

“Oh.”

 

My friend found this moment the most opportune to get up and walk back towards the main camp. “I’m tired!” She said, with a yawn. “Next time don’t hit me so hard, Mr. Cripple!”

 

I scrambled to my feet as she retreated to the others. My mouth hung open in shock. “That was you!?”

 

I got a giggle in response and I just stood there. A slight breeze hit my back and as I shivered from the new cold air I realized something.

 

I loved her.

 


	11. Life and Death

The dream I had that night was terrifying. I kept reliving the fight Wakka and I had with the Al Bhed machina except this time I was entirely aware that it was Rikku operating it, not Tekud. With each strike of my sword I could see myself causing Rikku pain. I woke up entirely shaken.

 

The funny thing is, Rikku didn’t seem to mind that we had attacked her. But I couldn’t help feeling guilty over the fact that I _could have killed her_. I could have killed the girl who I…well…

 

To be honest, I don’t really know how to describe the feelings I have for my close friend. Of course, I haven’t had much time to think about it. I certainly didn’t have time this morning to ponder of my emotions. The two seconds allotted between waking up and starting off on the Djose Highroad left me little time to focus on anything besides keeping me and Rikku’s identities a secret and wondering what Guadosalam could possibly be like.

 

Then, in what felt like only an hour or two, we were there and I didn’t have to speculate any longer.

 

[][]

[][]

 

The Guado, to be frank, freaked me out. I had seen a few in Luca, but didn’t really focus in on them what with all the other action going on. When I did, however, I noticed the insanely huge arms and weird body structures, not to mention the hair. Practically the first minute we got there, one of the more creepy looking ones greeted us.

 

“We have been expecting you, Lady Yuna. Welcome to Guadosalam. This way, my lady. This way.”

 

Yuna looked surprised, for obvious reason, and barely got a “Me?” out before Wakka stopped the guado.

 

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!”

 

“Oh, I beg your pardon. I am called Tromell Guado,” he said with a slight bow. “I am in the direct service of our leader, the great Seymour Guado. Lord Seymour has very important buisness with Lady Yuna.”

 

This elicited surprised looks from everyone except Auron and I; I was too busy wondering where I had heard the name ‘Seymour’ before and Auron was too busy being a badass. Well, that’s my theory anyways.

 

Yuna expressed the main question in the minds of the group. “Business with me? Whatever could it be, I wonder?”

 

Tromell motioned towards a rather large house or manor in the distance. “Please, come inside the manor. All will be explained. Of course, your friends are also welcome.”

 

Our new _friend_ turned towards the same manor and everyone followed except Rikku and I. She had noticed there was something on my mind.

 

“Tidus?”

 

“Yeah…something’s weird…where have I heard that name before?”

 

“Seymour?” She didn’t pause to let me respond; Rikku knew what I was thinking, as usual. “He’s the half-human half-guado Maester. He was at the tournament in Luca; he had released that huge aeon that took care of all those fiends. He even supported Operation Mi’ihen…well…not officially…”

 

“Wait, wait…he’s the guy with the weird blue hair, right?” My friend nodded.

 

“Hey mister, we’re lagging behind! Let’s go!” Without a second hesitation she ran up and caught up to Yuna, leaving me to follow.

 

[][]

[][]

 

“I will go inform Lord Seymour. Please wait here,” Tromell said. He shortly left, leaving us in a rather large room with plenty of food on the table. It was strange, I felt like the room was trying to appear safe and friendly but it failed just enough so that I could tell something wasn’t right. I shrugged at this, and began thinking about what I’d eat first.

 

“Stay on your guard.” Auron must have noticed something too.

 

I figured I’d voice my confusion. “Why? This guy’s just a priest, right?”

 

Auron nodded slightly. “Those with power use that power…Maesters have power.”

 

Was it me or did this guy seem to hate Maesters? Granted, the only reaction I’d seen from him was dead silence whenever they were brought into conversation, but that was different than his usual ‘semi-dead’ silence. Then again, maybe it’s all just in my head.

 

“Wait…Are you sure you don’t have something against Yevon?”

 

For the first time since I arrived in Spira I heard a laugh from the old guy, a short chuckle. “I lived a long time in Zanarkand…” he replied.

 

I wandered over to Lulu, who was staring intently at Yuna. Before I got a word out she spoke to me. “There’s no temple here in Guadosalam, see? Summoners usually just pass through on their way elsewhere…”

 

I gave a short laugh, which elicited a confused look from the black mage.

 

“What?”

 

“I didn’t even ask a question and you’re explaining things.”

 

“You’d rather I say nothing, then?” A smirk.

 

Lulu had known that my father, ‘Sir’ Jecht, had claimed to be from Zanarkand. Before we reached Djose she had asked me (conveniently aside from the others) whether this was true or not. Of course, what she really wanted to know was whether I believed _I_ was from Zanarkand. I replied truthfully, tired of lying to everyone. I _did_ believe I was from Zanarkand.

 

Lulu made a comment that Jecht had been under influence of Sin’s toxin. I, being on the front lines of Operation Mi’ihen, was likely to have been under the influence of Sin’s toxin also. I didn’t argue this, I couldn’t really say anything without explaining that I wasn’t really a Crusader…and I didn’t want to go down that road.

 

So, I guess she learned from all my questioning at Djose and the Moonflow that I needed to be _reminded_ of things. But it also brought to mind another point…

 

“No, I do appreciate you telling me…But maybe this means you finally believe I don’t know anything about Spira…and maybe _that_ means you believe me and my old man about Zanarkand, too?”

 

“Well...” she began. “There are many things I don’t know. Your…Zanarkand is one of those things…I suppose I can’t say what I think either way.” She paused for a moment, then looked at Wakka. “Still…be careful. You shouldn’t tell other people…”

 

“Yeah, I know.” I agreed, it wasn’t a good idea to just go up to any Yevonites and tell them I’m from this ‘holy city.’

 

I turned right in time to bump into Rikku, who was eating.

 

“Mmm, this is good!”

 

I nearly broke out laughing, but the opening of the door stifled my amusement. Tromell stood, conveniently without the Maester.

 

I sighed. I was tired of waiting.

 

[][]

[][]

 

Some small talk later and Seymour finally made an appearance. Yuna responded by repeating her main question.

 

“You…wanted to see me?”

 

Seymour flashed an eerie smile. I don’t like him. “Please, make yourselves at home. There is no rush.”

 

Auron coughed. “Please make this short. _Yuna_ must rush.” 10 points for the badass.

 

Seymour smiled a less friendly grin. “Pardon me. It has been a…long time since I had guests. Lady Yuna, this way.”

 

We followed our host, and the eerie feeling I was having increased tenfold.

 

[][]

[][]

 

I felt homesick. Seymour had just shown us a ‘sphere’ of Zanarkand, just as I remembered it. But I couldn’t reminisce for long, because what happened next totally made me forget all about my home.

 

When the sphere ended we all found ourselves in a bedroom, with a white haired woman sitting on a bed.

 

“Lady Yunalesca!” exclaimed Yuna.

 

Eh?

 

Seymour answered my unvoiced question. “She was the first person to defeat Sin and save the world from its ravages. And you have inherited her name…”

 

“It was my father who named me.”

 

“Lord Braska was entrusting you with a great task. He wanted you to face Sin, as Lady Yunalesca did. However, Lady Yunalesca did not save the world alone. To defeat the undefeatable Sin…” Seymour did the blitzball cheer…I mean ‘ _prayer_.’ “…it took an unbreakable bond of love – of the kind that binds two hearts for eternity. “

 

Is this getting anywhere?

 

Right as I thought this a man appears and walks to Lady Yunalesca. They held hands and hugged. Yuna looked at Seymour, and he leans over and whispers something into her ear. She covers her mouth and gasps, while the rest of us wonder what the heck is going on.

 

Seymour backs away, nods slowly. Yuna seems lost in thought.

 

[][]

[][]

 

Back in the banquet room, Yuna rushes to get a drink. After she did this, Rikku comments on something even I noticed.

 

“Wow! Your face is beet read!”

 

“Are you okay?” I chimed in.

 

She stumbled with her words for a moment. “He…he asked me to marry him!”

 

“You serious?” General shock all around. Except Auron, of course.

 

“You know what Yuna must do.” Is all he says, to Seymour.

 

“Of course. Lady Yuna – no all summoners – are charged with bringing peace to Spira. But this means more than just defeating Sin. She must ease the suffering of all Spira. She must be a leader for the people. I proposed to Lady Yuna as a Maester of Yevon.”

 

Everything inside me objected to this, though I can’t really explain why. Maybe because it seemed an echo of the sacrifice Yuna already had to make. These summoners die for the peace of Spira! What more do you want from them?

 

“Spira is no playhouse. A moment’s diversion may amuse the audience, but it changes nothing.” Auron made a good point.

 

Seymour seemed to take this in. “Even so…the actors must play their parts…”

 

There’s a bit of silence, then he walks over to the summoner. “There’s no need to answer right away. Please, think it over.”

 

Auron answered for her. “We will do so, then. We leave.”

 

Seymour ignored him, or so it seemed. “Lady Yuna, I await your favorable reply.” We all began to head out, but Seymour speaks up and Auron stops.

 

“Why are you still here, sir?” He bows. “I beg your pardon. We guado…are keen…to the smell of the Farplane…”

 

Auron, and the rest of us, leave without answering.

 

[][]

[][]

 

Everyone met up at the manor, but after a few seconds Rikku and I wander a bit away from the rest.

 

“What do you think?” She asks, as soon as we are out of a convenient hearing distance.

 

I knew what she was thinking. Would marriage stop Yuna from killing herself? Yeah, she’d have to marry that creep…but it’s better than death. No one wants death for a close one. Then again, no one wants unhappiness…

 

I could only shrug. “Well…she said she wasn’t going to stop…her pilgrimage. So…I guess it doesn’t matter…”

 

“Yeah…”

 

“Rikku?” We could hear the murmurs of the others not too far away. I’m sure they were discussing the same topic.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“If…you had to choose between life or happiness, which would you choose?”

 

Rikku pondered over it a moment. I knew she was thinking exactly what I had thought, so I felt no need to clarify. After a while she gave me an answer.

 

“I’m…Al Bhed. Life…to us…will always be more important than anything else.”

 

She looked me in the eye, and I lost my breath. “Hu uha sujac du y tacand du pa rybbo. Drao suja du y tacand du meja. Du aclyba taydr.” She said, in a low tone.

 

_No one moves to a desert to be happy. They move to a desert to live. To escape death._

 

I remembered an expression one of the few elderly Al Bhed once said to me at Home. Most Al Bhed never outlived the age of 50, either the desert got them or mishaps at a salvage dig…or most often…Sin. But this man lived, and I repeated what I heard him say.

 

“Fedr meva lusac y lryhla vun rybbehacc.”

 

_With life comes a chance for happiness._

I was reminded of the feeling of gratitude and content that I could feel in Home. Despite a harsh live and a hating world.

 

Rikku hugged me, although I didn’t really notice because I was too deep in thought.

 

Yuna would only truly be happy if she sacrificed herself for her people. That’s what she was has always wanted to do. Can I relate the experiences of the Al Bhed to Yuna’s experiences to come?

 

We returned to the group, although I don’t know what question was going through Rikku’s mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, I had to pretty much recap the whole ‘meeting with Seymour’ scene, I couldn’t skip past it. Thus, about half the chapter you already saw in the game. But, no matter…I hope you enjoyed the original stuff.
> 
> What I love about FFX is that it gives you a lot of stuff to think about, and then what I hate about FFX is that it never really openly acknowledges the conflict and different idealisms that are laid before gamers because of the perspective Tidus has. That’s why I love getting this perspective, it really delves deep into the Al Bhed conflict, and what Im sure Rikku had to go through during the pilgrimage.
> 
> This chapter was sloppy and I’m sorry. But I hope you enjoyed it!


	12. Who am I, What you are

I never went into the Farplane that day. Instead, I stayed outside with Rikku and Auron. Sure, I wanted to see if my mom was there…I guess to confirm if she was really dead or not. You know, I was seconds away from going in…until I noticed Rikku giving an uncharacteristic glance to its entrance.

 

Her eyes were a bit cloudy; similar to the time when she had told me of her mother’s death. She still had a smile on her face, though its brightness seemed to lesson. Auron didn’t seem to be paying attention to her, and I wondered if my observation was simply exaggerated. We were in a strange place; who knows what it can do to a person.

 

She leaned against the side of the staircase, and I went to join her. As a matter of fact, the thought of seeing my mother completely left my mind. After a minute of waiting, the Al Bhed thief whispered something barely audible.

 

“Eh dra tacand, drana yna hu summoners. Uh dra cymjykac, drana yna hu summoners. Frah yh Al Bhed teac, ra ec nynamo cahd. Drana yna vaf Al Bhed du pa vuiht eh dra Farplane.”

 

_In the desert, there are no summoners. On the salvages, there are no summoners. When an Al Bhed dies, he is rarely sent. There are few Al Bhed in the Farplane._

 

“Memories are nice, but that’s all they are. I keep mine inside.” She said afterwards, a little louder.

 

Did she just read my mind again? Answering my questions before they had halfway formed in my thoughts…

 

“…if you want to see your mom, you can go ahead Tidus…”

 

My eyes widened at that. Mind reading again. Maybe it was the shock of how she could read me so easily, or how I felt like I needed to answer right away…but what I said next I regretted for a long time.

 

“Why don’t you come with me? Why don’t you see your mom?”

 

Rikku looked directly away from me, her smile fading to an almost blank expression. Still smiling though.

 

I think it was then that it hit me. I mean; a lot of things hit me over the past few months. Stuff like war and prejudice, mercy and cruelty… Some things made me upset with others, upset with myself, grateful, guilty…the full spectrum of emotions. But I had never felt like I felt at this particular moment.

 

The Farplane was a place where the Yevonites could see their memories become something more than just recollections of the mind. But it wasn’t only that. It was where one goes when they die, where one went for an eternal peace or rest. A paradise.

 

Rikku had said there were few Al Bhed in the Farplane. When she first said this I had thought, “Well, then where are they?”

 

Lulu had told me once; the reason why the fiends dispersed into pyreflies after defeat was because they were made of pyreflies. Human ones…

 

To be Al Bhed meant not only going through the prejudice and pain of their lives, in the desert and at the salvage sites, but to go through an eternity of wandering, un-fullfillment…because of the same prejudice and pain…

 

Memories were inside because that’s the only place they could be kept. For the Al Bhed, memories were nice…but that was all they were. All they are.

 

[][]

[][]

 

The sight of Yuna, Wakka, and Lulu returning down the stairs into the Farplane stopped me from trying to comfort my friend, or at least make up for my stupid suggestion.

 

“Thanks for waiting!” the young summoner proclaimed. Her spirits seemed to have been raised much higher thanks to the visit. “I’ve decided. I have to tell Maester Seymour my answer…”

 

When the three young guardians reached us we all turned to make our way back to Guadosalam together. That is until I heard a disgusting grown.

 

“Uuggghhh…”

 

We all spun around to find a Guado…well…sort of. He seemed more like a ghost than anything else. I could hear the surprised gasps of the Guado who maintained the Farplane.

 

“Lord Jyscal!”

 

Auron shouted to Yuna. “It does not belong here. Send him!”

 

Yuna looked at Auron then ran a bit up the stairs. “Lord Jyscal…” she cried.

 

Lulu gave an anxious yell. “He is Lord Jyscal no more! Send him!”

 

The shout was enough to knock Yuna out of her little trance and finally send the Guado. I noticed that before this a blue spherical thing was dropped, and Yuna picked it up.

 

Auron motioned towards the exit. “Talk later…we leave.”

 

Now, I’m a rather laid back kind of guy. But when you just realize something like what I had just learned, and then you see some Zombie Guado come walking towards you…you get a little…uh…frazzled. I had no idea what was going on and all I wanted to do was just about anything I could to make Rikku smile again. But I couldn’t, too many people around, too many questions would arise afterwards. So I just listened. Frustrated.

 

Wakka was the first to speak. “W..what was that just now? Was that really Lord Jyscal?”

 

Yuna shook her head. “I don’t understand how a man like Lord Jyscal could die and not be sent…”

 

“I would think that he was sent once… be he stayed on Spira. Something…a powerful emotion could have bound him to this world. Such things happen…” replied Lulu.

 

“That’s against the rules, isn’t it?” asked Rikku.

 

Auron looked stern as ever. “It means he died an unclean death.”

 

By this time we had reached the doors of Seymour’s mansion.

 

“I’ll…I’ll go meet with Maester Seymour.”

 

As Yuna entered the mansion the group disbanded and I finally had my chance.

 

I followed Rikku away from the others, into a nice part of Guadosalam that looked over a small portion of the road from the Moonflow. I ran up and gave her a hug from behind, just like I had done every so often at Home. We’re both very physical people, so stuff like that just seemed to work perfectly.

 

Her action was the usual one, shrug me off with her shoulders and then turn to me with her smile on her face. Before she could say anything, however, I got out what had been bothering me.

 

“Rikku…E’s naymmo naymmo naymmo cunno ypuid fryd E cyet..pylg drana…E’s yh eteud…”

 

_I’m really really really sorry about what I said…back there…I’m an idiot…_

 

She laughed, which surprised me. “Tidus, Oui fana uhmo paehk fru oui yna…ev E teth’d mega oui vun fru oui yna…drah fa fuimt ryja y _maym_ bnupmas…”

 

_You were only being who you are…if I didn’t like who you are…then we would have a_ real _problem._

When I raised by downcast face to look at Rikku, I noticed Yuna returning from Seymour’s mansion surprisingly early…and everyone was congregating


	13. Dramatized Confusion

“Maester Seymour has gone to Macalania Temple.” Yuna had given us the news after a short visit in Seymour’s mansion. She didn’t have to stay long because apparently he wasn’t there.

 

Of course, we all thought it was quite strange that the Guado had just up and left before getting an answer from _the one_ _he proposed to_. As we exited Guadosalam we all gave our hypotheses.

 

Rikku suggested that Seymour must have expected Yuna to think about her answer for a longer period of time. To that Yuna gave a weird look…followed by an equally weird laugh.

 

“What is it?” Auron asked.

 

“Oh! Nothing…it’s nothing…” the young summoner replied.

 

“You’re a poor liar.”

 

On that note, a note that left me rather confused, we left Guadosalam and headed through the Thunder Plains on our way to Macalania.

 

[][]

[][]

 

The Thunder Plains were…interesting. No, I’m not talking about the fact that it is always raining and the sun _never_ shines, or the fact that it seems that the lighting had it out for all of us…all of that I managed to accept within the first few minutes. I’d gotten quite used to accepting crazy concepts ever since I left Zanarkand.

 

No…what I found interesting was the ability of Rikku to cling to me _the entire_ time we were in there. Not that I minded…had it been anyone else I’m sure I would have…but seeing as it was Rikku my biggest problem was keeping some rather strong feelings in check.

 

The Al Bhed girl had developed a nice gigantic fear of thunder and lighting. I’m not sure why, considering she loved tinkering with all things mechanical and that usually goes hand in hand with electricity. But fear she had; so all of us had to endure her whimpers until we stumbled upon a nice Travel Agency.

 

Stoic Auron, of course, wanted to continue on to Macalania as soon as possible. Rikku begged and begged, however, so he finally gave in and let us stay the night.

 

[][]

[][]

 

“Why do you hate lightning so much?” I asked my friend. We we’re in the room us guys were sharing. Across the hall was the room for the girls, where I think I saw Yuna. The rest we’re probably in the lobby.

 

Rikku shivered slightly at the name of her tormenter. “One time when I was little, I was playing in the water, the ocean. Brother and his friend Buddy were there…when suddenly I was attacked by a fiend! Brother tried fighting it off with a spell…but he missed and hit me instead! It was a thunder spell…” She gave a goofy grin. ”Heh heh heh…”

 

“Ouch!” was my reply.

 

To me, logically, I wouldn’t be so quick to fear lightning because of a spell mishap…then again I had never been electrocuted. Seeing how it bugged her so much, I figured I’d change the subject. I settled on what my mind had been pondering as of late.

 

“Hey Rikku…at the Farplane. I didn’t really know how to respond to what you told me…I guess I was sort of shocked. But, one thing I had wanted to say, was that I admire you.” I froze. “I mean! Not you, but the Al Bhed. All of you. You know, because of um…yeah.”

 

Real smooth Tidus.

 

I sat up from sort of lazily sitting on the edge of one of the beds. “What I mean is, I want to do something. To stop this. All the death and the hate around here…I want to help.”

 

Rikku just sat there, patiently, smiling. She always had a way of listening. For someone who always was in a chatty mood you wouldn’t think she’d be a quick listener, but she was. She would always let you say what you had to before responding. Another quality I admired. After I finished, she responded.

 

“I have a friend, he went to join the Crusaders.” She said, eyeing my Crusader garb that I still had to sport.

 

“An Al Bhed?” I asked, surprised.

 

“Yeah. Well, not a real Crusader. Al Bhed cannot join their ranks. But it’s this special program sponsored by the group, like an elite force or something. He wanted to help.”

 

“Does it bother you? That he’s working with the Yevonites.”

 

Rikku’s smile grew a bit brighter. “If he dies, he gets sent. Which is comforting. Do I miss him? Yeah…but I don’t mind him working with the Yevonites. He’s helping.”

 

I couldn’t help feeling impatient. “What’s…the poi[][]-…I mean what are you saying?”

 

Did Rikku just blush? No…she just turned away so quick I probably just saw it or…something.

 

She gave an uncomfortable laugh. “I…don’t know. I guess what I’m saying is that you’re…still here. So…you’re already helping.”

 

I didn’t know how to respond. So I didn’t. We talked a bit more and she ended up leaving to go talk to Yuna or something, and I ended up just lying back on the bed and going to bed a bit earlier than usual. The whole time, I couldn’t help wondering what she meant…

 

[][]

[][]

 

The next morning we were all gathered around in the lobby of the Travel Agency. Well, everyone except Yuna.

 

Lulu was giving that “Where is she?” look, so I figured I’d go get her.

 

“Be right back!” I said over my shoulder, heading to the girls’ room. Seconds from opening the door I heard a voice that was definitely male and definitely not Yuna.

 

All I could hear was muffled words, so I tried opening the door a slight crack. Um…key word being _tried_. I ended up tumbling in onto the floor, just in time to see Yuna hovering over a blue sphere recording of Lord Jyscal.

 

Yuna quickly stood up. “Yes?”

 

I stared at her helplessly. “Oh…uh…well…it…was nothing really…I…” She turned off the sphere. “I shouldn’t have come in, sorry…” I mumbled. Then I remembered what I had just seen. “Hey! Wasn’t that Lord Jyscal!?”

 

Yuna nodded. “This sphere is his will…it says ‘take care of my son.’”

 

My eyes widened. “Oh, you mean Seymour?”

 

She nodded again, then her eyes widened. “Oh! Everyone is probably waiting for me! I’m so sorry!”

 

“Heh…” I responded, while following her back to the main group.

 

[][]

[][]

 

We were at the edge of the Thunder Plains. Rikku could practically taste the lighting free air. That is, until Yuna stopped us.

 

“Um…I have something to say.”

 

Rikku clung to me a little tighter. “We’re almost there!”

 

Yuna smiled. “I’m sorry Rikku…” Her smile disappeared. “I need to say this now.”

 

We all huddled under a lightning rod, which sort of eased Rikku’s nervousness.

 

The young summoner took a deep breath. “I’ve…decided to marry.”

 

Lulu nodded. “I thought so.” Um…was I the only one surprised here?

 

Wakka answered my question. “B-but why? Why’d you change your mind ya?”

 

“For Spira’s future…and Yevon’s unity. I thought it would be best to do.”

 

Auron frowned. “That’s not good enough.”

 

Lulu borrowed the frown. “Wait…is it because of that sphere of Lord Jyscal?”

 

Auron took a step towards Yuna. “Show me.”

 

For the first time I saw Yuna get almost panicky. “I can’t.” She calmed down. “I…have to meet with Lord Seymour. Please try to understand.”

 

The hardened warrior turned away. “As you wish.”

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

“Just one thing…”

 

“Auron, I won’t quit my pilgrimage.”

 

“Then…it is fine.”

 

In silence we left the Thunder Plains and made it to the Macalania Woods. I put a hand to my forehead. Does this dramatized confusion ever end?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, the guy Rikku is referencing is definitely Gippal. Am I implying they had some sort of relationship before the events of FFX? Definitely. That being said I'm not a big Gippal x Rikku fan myself, but it makes sense a bit for the story I think. The reference was for those keen enough to pick up on it and also to give some background to Rikku.


	14. Almost Serious

Rikku was thrilled when we reached the Macalania woods. After realizing there was no lighting or thunder she sprung up and started moving around just like her old self. I ran ahead along side of her, and once we both kind of tired out we waited a bit for the slow crowd to catch up.

"Hurry up, slowpokes!" Rikku shouted.

Before the others came up into hearing distance, I asked Rikku, "So what do you think about Yuna choosing to marry?"

Rikku shrugged. "It’s hard to say which decision was best from my point of view. But I guess if Yuna is going to continue her pilgrimage married or not, I suppose I don’t want her to get married. Seymour is kinda creepy. Not to mention she wouldn’t be marrying for love."

Before I could reply, we noticed Barthello come running towards us.

"Hey! You, have you seen Dona?"

"Me? No, can’t say I have…"

Wakka and the others came up behind us. "What’s up, ya?"

"Dona and I got separated on the way here. Damn it all! I’ve got to find her!" Barthello looked ready to punch one of us. I backed away slowly.

Auron, for the umpteenth time, maintained his composure. "Calm down."

"But if anything happens to her…"

"Running around in a panic is not going to help. Right now, you have to keep your cool, and search."

"But—"

"Guard your emotions, then guard your summoner."

Barthello seemed hurt at first, then he relaxed. "You’re right…"

"Want some help?" Rikku offered.

Barthello shook his head. "No, I’ve taken up enough of your time. Thank you, Sir Auron." The guardian did the prayer gesture and then ran off.

[][]

[][]

Hours later, or so it seemed, we finally were nearing the end of the Woods. I could see one of Rin’s travel agencies in the distance.

"Wait." Auron said. A simple command, but we all listened. "It is here…somewhere…"

"Here? What’s here?" I asked. I was tired and _really_ wanted to get some rest at the travel agency.

He turned towards me. "Something you should see."

"But, Sir Auron…" Yuna began.

"It won’t take long." In the split of an eye Auron whipped his sword and chopped down a tree, revealing a path to a sort of pond.

I followed him into the area and saw that it wasn’t just a pond, it was an entire lake, sparkling with the light that made its way through hundreds of tree branches. A huge tree was located in what looked like dead center.

"This place…" I began. I had no idea where to end it.

"This isn’t just water. It’s what spheres are made of. It absorbs and preserves people’s memories."

Almost like it was a planned, a huge blob appeared after Auron spoke.

"What’s that!?" Wakka cried.

"Fiends are also attracted to these places…"

[][]

[][]

One long arduous fight against a big blob later…and now I _really really_ need to take a break at the travel agency. But in the aftermath of the battle I found one of those “sphere” things in the water.

Auron nodded towards it. "Jecht left it here. 10 years ago."

Gasps and open mouths all around.

"Play it back."

I pushed play and after a sort of blinding bright light, a movie started to play. Auron wasn’t lying; it was my dad alright.

My old man had decided to record a few things to "Show my wife and kid when I get back." True to form, most of it was just a nice example of ‘how to annoy Auron with a sphere camera’ as demonstrated by my father. The thing faded out back into the white.

"What’s the point? He wasn’t on some pleasure cruise here…" I said, almost annoyed that I had to sit through more of my dad’s classic stupidity.

"I…think there’s more…" Rikku said, making me turn back to the sphere. Sure enough, there was.

The new image was of my old man sitting in the same area we were all gathered in. Big lake, big tree. Lord Braska and Auron weren’t around though.

"Hey. If…you’re sitting here watching this. It means your stuck in Spira like me. You might not know when you’ll get back home, but you better not be crying!" He chuckled. "Although, I guess I’d understatnd. But you know what?" My old man scratched the back of his head. "There’s a time when you have to stop crying and move on. You’ll…be fine. And remember…you’re my son. And…well…uh…Nevermind." His hand reached to turn the sphere off. "…I was never good at these kinds of things…"

He turned it off, and then it faded back, this time the camera wasn’t focusing on anything. I heard his voice in the background though. "Anyways. I believe in you. Be good. Uh…Goodbye."

I didn’t really know what to say. It was the first time my dad ever talked to me like that. "He sounded almost serious…"

Auron coughed. "He was serious. Jecht had already accepted his fate."

"His fate?"

"Jecht he…he was always talking about going home to Zanarkand. But as he journeyed with us and came to understand Spira, and Braska’s resolve…Well it happened gradually but Jecht changed. He decided he would join Braska in his fight against Sin…"

"So then…he gave up going home?" I asked. Was Auron implying that, like my dad, I would never get home? I _am_ a guardian of the daughter of the man he was protecting. I didn’t like the idea of history repeating itself.

"That was his decision." Auron concluded. He started heading out the area and slowly everyone began to follow. I just sat there, taking one last look at the sphere.

I think I understood his choice. My old man wanted to go on but knew he couldn’t. He wouldn’t be able to go on until he accepted it. Besides…even if he found a way back…he wouldn’t have left his friends before their journey ended.

Would I leave Rikku or the others if I had a chance to go home to Zanarkand now?

I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked up to see Rikku smiling, serenely.

"Hey…everybody’s leaving. C’mon." She said.

I nodded. We caught up with the rest of the group.

_ Would I leave Rikku or the others if I had a chance to go home to Zanarkand now _ ?

No. Never.

[][]

[][]

I guess the sphere viewing was all the rest I needed. No longer tired, I figured it was because my head felt lighter. Spending less time thinking about Zanarkand, accepting the fact I probably wasn’t going to ever get home…it actually relieved me. Now I could focus all my thoughts onto the current situations.

Good thing I had regained my energy. Turns out we weren’t going to take a break at the agency. In fact, we ran into Tromell as soon as we got there.

"Lady Yuna, we’ve been expecting you. We were, however, surprised you decided to come so soon. Eh…pleasantly surprised, of course. Lord Seymour sends his apologies for having left without notice."

Yuna nodded. "It’s quite alright. I have one question, if I may sir…"

"My lady?"

"I want to keep journeying, even if I marry. Do you think that Maester Seymour would allow me to? The summoner asked.

Tromell smiled. "But of course my lady. Lord Seymour wishes nothing else, I’m sure."

Yuna turned towards us and nodded. "Bye…"

Tremell looked surprised. "My lady…well…we must follow Guado tradition. I’ll have to ask you to wait here a little while longer. I’ll send someone to escort you." He walked away.

Something made me feel kinda weird about this.

"I…" Yuna began.

Auron spoke up. "We’re all with you. Do as you will."

"Thank you." The summoner gave a short bow.

Yuna and Tromell began walking away, until we all heard a loud engine noise…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of this chapter was just tweaking the actual game dialogue, I didn’t change too much, so I’m sorry. But I hope you guys got a bit out of a few of Tidus’ reactions, or lack thereof. Around this part of the game he was whining a lot about the marriage as a result of his feelings for Yuna. In this story, though, he isn’t concerned with Yuna as much as the fact that she’s a summoner that’s going to die. So, I found it to make more sense for him to be less concerned with the marriage than he was in the game.


	15. Reunion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this chapter, as some of you all know, is going to be interesting. This is where things aren’t edited copies of the script of FFX. Here it gets more original…at least…I hope…

“Al Bhed!” Wakka cried. We all looked up, and sure enough there was a collection of Al Bhed on snowmobiles, along with a large machina that was obviously created for destructive purposes.

 

Auron whipped out his sword. “Stand back.”

 

“Thank you!” Tromell exclaimed. He seemed very assured in Auron’s abilities.

 

“Go Yuna!” Wakka shouted. “We’ll meet up at the temple ya?”

 

The summoner nodded. She and Tromell began the long trek to the Macalania Temple, leaving us with the Al Bhed.

 

“RIKKU!” One of them shouted. We all turned back around, and sure enough, there stood Brother!

 

“Tuh’d ehdanvana un oui kad drec!” he shouted, pointing at the huge machina.

 

_Don’t interfere or you get this!_

What the crap was Brother thinking? Despite his crazy actions, I was overwhelmed with joy of seeing one of my closest friends again, for the first time in a long time. Without hesitation I thew off my crusader helmet and cried out to him.

 

“BROTHER! Ed'c sa! Tidus! Kevd! Fro yna oui tuehk ymm uv drec?”

 

_Brother! It’s me! Tidus! Kevd! Why are you doing all of this?_

His jaw dropped, as did the mouths of almost every other Al Bhed accompanying him. Within an instant Brother was tumbling down the snow covered hill, along with a few of the other men. As I ran out to meet him…I couldn’t help but notice the shocked look on Wakka’s face.

 

Brother started babbling. “Kevd? Ruf...oui...fa druikrd...tayt...oui yht Jekud…Rikku fyc…” he said, reaching out and grabbing me in huge bear hug.

 

_Kevd? How…you…we thought…dead…you and Jekud…Rikku was…”_

 

“E nyh ehdu res yd dra Moonflow.” came a voice. Rikku had come up behind us, as did the rest of the party. Auron looked as cool and collected as ever, along with Kimahri. Wakka still had his mouth wide opened, and Lulu looked as if she finally understood everything. Rikku continued, “Ra ryt ehytjandahdmo palusa Yunie'c kiynteyh, yvdan oui ymm kud cabynydat yd Operation Mi'ihen. Tuh'd funno, E ymnayto payd ehdu rec rayt ruf silr fa seccat res...dra zang...

 

_I ran into him at the Moonflow… He had inadvertently become Yunie's guardian, after you all got separated at Operation Mi'ihen. Don't worry, I already beat into his head how much we missed him...the jerk..._

 

[][]

 

[][]

 

Auron quickly reminded us that Yuna was waiting for us at the temple, cutting our reunion short. I gave Brother a basic idea of what happened, leaving a lot of things out of course…I definitely didn’t tell him my dad was Sin. But I gave a brief explanation of how I knew Auron and how he had found me. Then it was Brother’s turn to explain.

 

He stuttered and mumbled so much we could barely understand… but then I realized Brother was basically telling me that I wasn’t allowed to know. I tried to weasel some kind of explanation for the machina, but I couldn’t get anything out of any of the Al Bhed. Rikku was…quiet.

 

Giving up, I explained how Rikku and I were hoping to convince Yuna from finishing her pilgrimage, but we hadn’t come up with a plan yet. So we figured we’d accompany her until we could come up with something. Basically. Good thing it was all said in Al Bhed, I definitely didn’t want Wakka or Lulu or Kimahri to hear our plan.

 

Brother kind of humphed at everything Rikku and I said, but it seemed to change his mind about the machina. He motioned to the other Al Bhed, and commanded them to move out.

 

“Tidus…E femm caa oui _cuuh_ yd Home.” He said, emphasizing the ‘soon’ part for some reason. “Drah oui lyh dymg du so vydran, yht fa lyh syga oui Al Bhed. Rikku...drec ec hud y kuut etay...”

 

_I will see you_ soon _at Home. Then you can talk to my father, and we can make you Al Bhed. Rikku...this is not a good idea..._

 

I was confused, as usual, but at least that machina wasn’t used…whatever it was supposed to do. The way Brother said ‘soon’ still irked me though. Something was up…and Rikku knew about it, judging by her reaction (or lack of) to what Brother was saying.

 

But I didn’t have time to think. There was a group of guardians Rikku and I had to address.

 

[][]

 

[][]

 

Wakka was furious. “What the hell is this? You and Rikku…AL BHED?” It looked as if he was trying to decide between hitting us with his blitzball or cussing us out.

 

Lulu, her normal calm self, quickly addressed her friend. “Wakka! Calm down…”

 

He turned on her and Auron. “You knew?”

 

They both nodded.

 

“Why didn’t you tell me? I’ve been traveling with heathens the whole time! And Tidus, you even fooled us into thinking you were a crusader!”

 

Lulu frowned. “This is what I don’t understand.” She looked at me. “You don’t have the eyes of the Al Bhed, nor some of the features. And you’re eyes are both blue, so you cannot be half…how is it then that you call on of the Al Bhed ‘Brother’?”

 

I gave a hesitant laugh. “Well…you see, Brother…that’s his actual name. And you’re right, I’m not…” I looked at Rikku. “I mean…I wasn’t _born_ an Al Bhed…persay…”

 

I gave a brief overview of how I met Rikku. I played a bit off the story that we met near Luca, after Rikku saved my life. The same story we had given Wakka when Rikku first became a guardian. I could tell we both felt horrible about lying still, but at least he was getting more of a half-truth than a full lie. He just wouldn’t understand about me coming from Zanarkand. If anything, my real story would just upset him further.

 

“…so I am really Jecht’s son. But because of Sin’s toxin, I had no idea who I was when I met Rikku. The Al Bhed took me in…but then when I met Auron at Operation Mi’ihen…I remembered. He gave me the crusader outfit, because at the time all I had was the Al Bhed clothes…and of course that wouldn’t have gone over well.”

 

Wakka seemed to calm down. He patted me on the back. “That’s a long story, ya? But I think I understand. Sin’s toxin will do crazy things to you!”

 

I figured the storm had passed, but then Wakka spotted Rikku, who had sort of moved off to the side while I told my tale. He regained his fury, and fast.

 

“But why didn’t anyone tell me about Rikku! She is full Al Bhed right? Why did you let her become guardian?”

 

Auron finally seemed to lose patience. “If you’re so concerned about guarding Yuna, then why are we still here…instead of at Macalania Temple? Enough. We must hurry.”

 

Wakka was still fuming…but not as bad as before. Lulu…satisfied with the answer she received for her questioning. Kimahri was stoic, and Auron looked almost…nervous? I think he knew something about Macalania Temple that we didn’t…

 

To say that we ran to Macalania Temple would be a lie. We sprinted


	16. Touch

Okay, so imagine you’ve just sprinted to Macalania Temple. You’re tired, not too happy, really in desperate need of water, all that. Now that you’ve got an idea of how I was feeling when we arrived, maybe you’ll understand why I punched the guy.

I mean, come on, we just got there and the first thing the guard does is one of those lame “Halt!” commands and then he goes and motions to Rikku. “The likes of her are not welcome in this hallowed place.” The fact that I didn’t punch him right there shows that I have a great deal of self-control, if you ask me. Of course, it doesn’t end there.

“She is a guardian,” says Auron.

Then in this stupid snotty voice we hear, “An Al Bhed, a guardian? Preposterous!”

And well, yeah, the next thing you know the guy is on the ground with a bloody nose and my hand hurts. Everyone did a sort of simultaneous “gasp” and even Auron, believe it or not, looked at least a little bit surprised. Sure I feel bad now but, man, the look on Rikku’s face…I just…well…maybe my feelings for her have really begun to affect my actions.

Good thing he was the only one standing guard at the time, it would have been rather unfortunate for us to make such a noisy violent entrance. So, we all just kind of stepped over him and entered the temple, ready to hook up with Yuna and get the next Aeon.

[][]

[][]

I felt like we were falling forever. It couldn’t have been more than 2 hours ago that we entered the temple. It all happened so fast, too fast. We found the sphere; the one Yuna had dropped, and learned about Lord Jyscal, as well as his son’s murderous actions. Realizing that Yuna was in danger we rushed through the Cloister of Trials, and there we met Maester Seymour himself.

Yuna came out with the new aeon, and revealed her plan to stop Seymour. But the guy, I’ve determined, is nuts. We ended up fighting him, a tough fight, but we won. Yuna tried sending him but right then his stupid guado groupies ran in and began falsely accusing us of being traitors. Of course, we tried to explain what we had learned from Lord Jyscal’s sphere, but the groupies destroyed the sphere right between his eyes.

Well, Seymour’s dead now. With no sending I hope he turns into a fiend and we get to kill him on our travels at some point. I have this horrible feeling that somehow we’ll have to battle him again though…weird.

Then we were running, running from the groupie guards, and just as we had made it to the frozen lake, we run into some huge ice monster. We were winning too, but then that stupid fiend had to pound on the ice; making it crack and then well…we were falling.

[][]

[][]

I woke up in what appeared to be an ancient city. Everything was hazy, pyreflies flying around. I don’t understand how you can fall through an ice lake and end up in a city that has water only up to my shins, but that’s what happened. And how come the Hymn of the Fayth could be heard? Emptying my mind of all these thoughts, it occurred to me that I was alone.

“Rikku!” She was the first thing I thought of once I realized I was alone. “Rikku! Where are you?”

“Tidus!” Thank God. “We’re all over here!”

I quickly ran towards her voice, and I was glad to find everybody intact. We all weren’t sure what to do next, so I guess we naturally just sat down and took a break. After a bit Rikku pulled me aside.

“Yunie’s okay, she’s breathing fine and everything. How’s Lulu and Wakka? I’m…sort of…afraid to talk to them…” she said.

I nodded, understanding how Wakka was still upset about her being Al Bhed. “Well, right now I think you’re the least of Wakka’s worries. He just found out his beloved maester is a murderer, and I think he’s in sort of denial. I think Lulu has pretty much accepted everything that has happened though,” I explained.

Rikku nodded. “She’s so together. All grown up, I guess.”

“I guess.” I shrugged.

“Well, just give me 5 or 6 more years.”

I smiled. “I like you just the way you are.”

Rikku smiled back and in an instant I forgot where we were. It was just me and her. She tugged a bit at my arm. “Did the fall irritate it?” She moved it gently.

My arm was fine; it was pretty much at 100 percent now. What was bugging me at the moment is the gash I got on my upper chest due to that stupid Ice monster. I wasn’t going to point it out, but Rikku spotted it.

And then her hands were caressing my neck and chest and she was saying something, probably like “Are you okay?” but I wasn’t listening. My eyes shut on their own and I just felt her, I can’t explain it. Somehow we were back at Home, somehow I was playing blitzball, somehow I was watching the sunset, somehow her touch just brought it all to my mind.

But it was over so quick, once she determined that I was in okay shape. We headed back to the others, where they were discussing how we were not Yevon outlaws. Yuna was still determined to continue on her pilgrimage. Rikku and I still wanted her to quit, but this Seymour business complicates things. The thing to do right now, I guess, is support her. It’s not easy for her, I can imagine.

And then we saw my father. The Hymn of the Fayth had stopped and the ground started to shake. Looking up we all saw Sin, sitting motionless in the water above us. How was there water above us? I don’t know, but it wasn’t exactly my focus at the moment.

“Sin!” someone shouted.

Lulu stood up. “The toxin! Watch out!”

[][]

[][]

It was at that moment, when everything went white and then black, that I realized that my old man really was Sin. Of course I had no reason not to believe Auron, but it wasn’t until that moment that I just _knew_.

In the black, in the darkness, I could see Zanarkand. Picture Perfect. I just knew I was seeing it through my dad somehow. So I started talking to him.

“Zanarkand…You homesick too?”

I saw a group of blitzballs bunched together. “That’s not your world anymore. You’re Sin now.” Then I saw myself, as a boy. “Hey, I’m older now, you know?” Next I saw my old man, standing in front of what looks like my house.

“I know,” I said. “You want this to end. I’ll find a way. Promise.”

[][]

[][]

I woke up in the desert.


	17. Crashing Down

My body cried out against the heat. I told it to shut up and keep running. I had to find them.

 

[][]

 

I ran into Lulu and Auron after getting into a fight with a fiend. They ran in to help out, giving me some mental relief as well as physical.

 

After we defeated the foe, I didn’t feel like any small talk. “The others?” I asked.

 

“Haven’t found them yet. We’re supposed to stay in one place if we get split up.” Lulu replied, as Auron began to walk away.

 

As good as staying in one place in a _blisteringly hot desert_ sounds; I figured I’d go with Auron on this one. “Wait here if you want.” I motioned to Mr. Bushido. “He’s not.”

 

It wasn’t too long before we found Wakka. It was almost funny that the big guy was hiding under machina, but when we realized Yuna wasn’t with him the mood grew even more serious. Wakka made sure to show the machina his true feelings by giving it a good kick. “First I lose Yuna, then I’m ambushed by machina! Great day I’m having.”

 

Next came Kimahri, probably the most downcast over the disappearance of Yuna.

 

Finally, there was Rikku.

 

[][]

 

To my surprise, and probably the other members of the group besides Auron, Rikku was fairly calm. With her usual smile and happy manner she greeted us and then calmly asked if “Yunie” was with us.

 

While Lulu responded negatively, I thought it over in my mind.

 

Then, of course, I felt like an idiot. Undoubtedly we must be close to Home; I don’t know much about the Spiran continent but I don’t recall hearing about any other large desert besides Bikanel. Which probably means we’re all close to Home…and if we can’t find Yuna it probably means she was found by the usual Al Bhed scouting groups. We really weren’t in bad shape at all.

 

While I was thinking this, Rikku happened to confirm my suspicions. “Um…there's something I wanna tell you, but promise not to say anything!” She exclaimed, motioning towards the group.

 

Wakka gave her one of the dirtiest looks imaginable. I see he still hasn’t gotten over what was revealed on the Macalanian Lake.

 

Rikku responded rather hurt. “No glaring either! I know where we are…we’re on Bikanel Island. There’s a place us Al Bhed call Home near here. Yunie’s there, I’m sure of it! Other Al Bhed must’ve come and rescued her!”

 

Wakka sneered. “Rescued? You mean kidnapped!”

 

I rolled my eyes. The guy had to grow up. “What does it matter as long as she’s safe? Besides, I think we’re not too far off. Let’s go!”

 

I was in such a good mood. Sure, we got here unconventionally, but I sure had been missing Home for the past few months of travel. I’m sure Brother has told everyone that I’m still alive, it’ll be great to just hang out for a while. And, maybe it will give Rikku and I a chance to figure out a way to prevent Yuna from going out with the pilgrimage.

 

A few minutes later a direction sign could be seen, one that was in Al Bhed. We stopped for a minute by it, as Rikku seemed to think it was necessary to address the group before we reached Home.

 

“We’re almost here…um…I just gotta ask one thing…”

 

Wakka huffed. “What is it this time, ya?”

 

Rikku frowned, something I didn’t like seeing. “Well…it’s just that Yevon did something really bad to us before…and I just need you guys to promise not to tell anyone about this place!”

 

“What are you accusing Yevon of doing now, eh?” The large man boomed.

 

But the sound of the gunshots reached our ears before he even finished the sentence.

 

[][]

 

No.

 

No. No. No. No. No.

 

NO.

 

Home was being destroyed. At least, that’s what I got out of the screams and the fire, the explosions and that smell…that smell of blood and just _death_ , the one I got to meet first hand at Operation Mi’ihen…

 

I began to sprint, we all did, but no matter how fast I ran the world just kept crashing down. Rikku was ahead of me, screaming and crying. And through the midst of this…words that just infuriated me all the more…

 

“What? Yuna’s down there?” said Wakka.

 

“Of all the places…Let’s go!” replied Lulu.

 

The lack of concern for the Al Bhed…just…Did they happen to miss the lives being destroyed before their eyes, the home of a people being wiped out? Did they care, did they even bother to think of _who_ could have done this?” I know they were guardians and Yuna was their summoner…but I mean…this…this…

 

This can’t be real.

 

At this point, there were tears forming in my eyes. I fought them back, which was probably the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

 

[][]

 

“Keyakku!”

 

Rikku ran towards an injured body. The area was covered with the injured…and the dead.

 

“Who…whose attacking us?” she asked him. “Fru tet drec du oui?”

 

_Who did this to you?_

 

In what must have been his dying breath, he got two words out: “Yevon…Guado…”

 

“Keyakku? Keyakku!”

 

He was gone.

 

Lulu said something. I don’t even know what, I wasn’t listening. I was trying to figure how many people I could possibly carry out of here…if I could find anyone left alive.

 

It was here I met Cid.

 

Rikku was still kneeling by Keyakku as he came up and checked the young man’s pulse. He was dead. Rikku looked about to cry. I don’t know how she was holding back the tears. I don’t know how _I_ was holding back tears.

 

Cid stood back up. “You Rikku’s friends?” He gave me the once-over. I’m sure he knows all about me, and probably was able to guess who I was despite the crusader gear. “Well don’t just stand there, let’s go! Let’s go kick those Guado out of our Home!”

 

We all followed as he headed deeper into Home. I lagged behind with Rikku, for a moment.

 

“Cid?” I asked.

 

“Yeah.” She said. She didn’t look me in the eye. “Let’s go. We have to save Yunie.”

 

I almost did a double take. Did _Rikku_ miss what was going on here? I was amazed. Either she could internalize like no one I know…or…well I don’t know what else. Should I be doing this? Should I try turning away from the fact that my second home was being destroyed? And focus on the task at hand?

 

I voiced my concern. Sort of. “Not only Yuna…right?”

 

She didn’t respond.

 

 

[][]

 

More rooms. Same destruction.

They’re sick. The Guado let powerful fiends go loose all over the place, along with their soldiers. What are they thinking? Why are they doing this? I know we upset them at Macalania…but there is no way they could have tracked us from there to Bikanel! _I_ have no idea how we ended up here. That means that it must be a direct attack on the Al Bhed. But why? Why now?

 

“…The Summoner’s Sanctum!” I heard from Rikku.

 

Summoner’s Sanctum? Oh right, I think I had heard some whisperings of a place where they keep summoners, to stay them from their suicidal journeys.

 

Lulu asked what the others were wondering. “Rikku, what is the Summoner’s Sanctum?”

 

Rikku grimaced. “The Summoner’s Sanctum is where we keep the summoners. We keep them safe there!”

 

Wakka matched grimace for grimace. “You kidnapped them.”

 

I don’t know what happened here. I really don’t. I wish I could internalize like Rikku, but my snapping point was right there. Right at Wakka’s words.

 

“Kidnap them!? The Al Bhed are saving lives and this is what they get!? Did any of you notice the dead people _lining_ the halls and the rooms on our way here? Are you trying to justify those deaths with a “kidnapping” accusation? As if somehow they all deserve this?”

 

I know Wakka wasn’t really accusing anyone, he was just stating the truth. But when you snap, you snap. I was as hot as the explosions surrounding us.

 

“In case none of you remember, those summoners _die._ Most of them don’t reach Sin, and when they do, they die before they defeat him…or they die in victory. God forbid someone wants to stop this, someone wants to try…to find…another…”

 

Rikku was crying.

 

“…way.”

 

I hung my head. It was only a tear or two; I don’t think anyone else noticed as their eyes were all on my ranting self anyhow. But it was enough to bring me back down onto this plane of reality. We need to find Yuna.


	18. Promise

She wasn’t in the Summoners’ Sanctum. In the silence that followed our realization, everyone came to the same conclusion.

 

They got her.

 

In that same instant I recognized why the Guado attacked, why so many Al Bhed died. They died protecting Yuna.

 

And so there I was running up a flight of stairs only because everyone else was, running through hallways as Rikku led us all somewhere, thinking. I was thinking about my friends, the people who welcomed me into their home. No, I told myself, they didn’t die in vain.

 

We’re going to get Yuna back.

 

[][]

 

“Hu desa! Ku, ku, ku!”

 

_No time! Go, go, go!_

 

We arrived at the bridge of the very airship I helped retrieve out of the dark water. It feels like it was so long ago.

 

“Ajanouha uh puynt?”

 

_Everyone on board?_

 

In the center of the bridge stood Rikku’s father, Cid. Now that I was seeing him in person, I could almost feel the qualities of leadership and determination that I have heard so much about in the surrounding air. And, in the briefest of moments, I saw some family resemblance. Rikku always seemed so sure of something, something I never could figure out. Her father stood there with that same sort of assurance. It was comforting in a lot of ways, and it’s probably why he made such a good leader.

 

The scene at hand featured all of the guardians gathered around, basking in silence as the sounds of preparation for take-off could be heard. Seeing as no one else was going to ask, I took the initiative. “We’re going to get Yuna, right?”

 

Cid gave me a look, probably the same one I had been giving everyone else when they had been focused on Yuna rather than the massacre of a people. “Fa'na kaddehk _uin_ baubma cyva vencd.”

 

_We’re getting_ our _people safe first._

 

The emphasis on “our” hit me hard. I knew Cid wasn’t neglecting the thought of how to retrieve Yuna. As her uncle, I know he must be as worried as I am, if not more. But first Cid had to get everyone out of here.

 

Somehow the man managed to scold me for my lack of attention towards matters of importance and at the same time make it known he considers me a part of them, an Al Bhed. I had no response to give.

 

He turned back around to direct Brother, who was at the helm. To my left stood Rikku, crying.

 

I tried to comfort her. Turning her to face me I said, “It’ll be okay Rikku. I think all the survivors of the attack are on board now. Everyone’s safe now.”

 

Rikku shook her head, her tears refusing to stop. “No, no, don’t you see?”

 

I didn’t have time to see anything as at that very moment the airship started up. Through the windows I could see a hatch above us opening slowly, letting the desert sun shine one last time on Rikku’s head. The airship began to shake as we hovered, and then began to rise.

 

“Whaaa!?” Wakka cried.

 

“It’s an airship!” Cid exclaimed, proudly. “And it’s what we’re going to use to find Yuna, so hold on!”

 

“An _airship_?” Wakka asked. “A machina that can fly?”

 

His incredulousness was soon pushed to the back of my mind as I could see Home come into view. A cheer erupts, and it takes me a second to understand. This is the first time we’ve actually used the airship. I remember, months ago, when I would help with some basic repairs and explain to Brother some basic flight controls. Our work seemed to have paid off, in this most desperate time of need.

 

The cheer soon subsided, however, when everyone focused on the partially destroyed Home. Rikku had stopped crying, and in the wiping of her tears she started to hum the Hymn of the Fayth. Soon everyone joined in. Even Wakka was humming it, although I’m sure he had no idea why it was being sung. It was beautiful. But, in the back of my mind it was scary.

 

And through the tears and the humming and the look on Rikku’s face I suddenly knew what was happening.

 

I fell to my knees.

 

“VENA!”

 

_FIRE!_

 

[][]

 

“Rikku?”

 

I knocked softly onto a cabin door. I could hear her crying inside, although it was muffled. When she didn’t respond, I checked if it was locked. It wasn’t, so I entered slowly.

 

Rikku was sitting on an Al Bhed style bed, looking out a window where you could see what remained of Home. If you didn’t look very closely, the view only gave an empty desert, not much more. But after a moment I saw signs of Home…my Home.

She continued looking outside. “I know why Pops had to destroy it, but…but…it’s just not fair!” she cried, punching the bed. “And then that poopie, calling it fireworks!?”

 

Rikku was referring to Wakka’s failed attempt at trying to cheer her up. Of course, he said a fairly insensitive thing, but I was more or less proud of him at that moment. Wakka had finally taken his thoughts off of Yuna for a moment, and I could tell he was softening towards the Al Bhed. Still, his comment unnecessarily stung Rikku’s growing wound.

 

I sat down on the end of the bed. “It can be rebuilt, right?” I asked.

 

Rikku sighed. “Yeah, but not in the desert. Here it was a secret from Yevon. Now we have to find a new place.” She looked away from the window. “If we can.”

 

I hung my head. Two homes destroyed. And although I was on a quest to return to the first one, I had an idea that I wouldn’t be seeing either ever again.

 

After a moment Rikku turned to me and I saw that her eyes were brighter and she was done crying. She stood up and dragged me up with her. “So what do we do now?” She asked. “Have we found where they have taken Yunie?”

 

“Not yet, although I think your Dad is hot on her trail. They couldn’t have taken her very far.” I was amazed at how focused the girl before me was, so much younger but so much older, it seems.

 

“Tidus.” She said, catching my eye.

 

“Eh?”

 

“Thanks. For talking with me, I mean.” She gave me one her brightest smiles.

 

“Don’t worry Rikku. We’ll get Yuna back. And we’ll stop her from the pilgrimage, somehow. And then we can go rebuild Home.” I said, earnestly.

 

She smiled again. “Is that a promise?”

 

I tensed up, knowing that I might not be able to promise her what I just said. It wasn’t that I was lying, and I truly believed we could somehow stop Yuna’s pilgrimage. It was the idea of returning when we were done that made me uneasy.

 

I relaxed again, as best as I could. I decided to shrug off the eerie feeling I was getting.

 

“You bet it is.”

 

She laughed, punched my arm playfully, and then brought me in close for one of the best hugs of my life.


	19. Flash

 

“Whoa, whoa, whoa…hold on a minute here.”

 

Rikku paused, mid-sentence.

 

“Now I can take finding myself 1000 years in the future. And you know what, I can handle more than one encounter with this Sin thing. Summoners, Guardians, Ronso, Guado, Temples; I’ve just rolled with the punches and took it all in. But…”

 

Rikku cocked her head to the side, questioning.

 

“…But now you’re telling me that there’s this giant dragon that flies around the city all day and protects it?

 

Rikku nodded, slowly.

 

“And now we’re going to fight it, so we can get Yuna.”

 

Another nod.

 

“Well then, what are we waiting for?”

 

Rikku laughed, tossing me my sword. “You.”

 

[][]

 

Twenty or so fiends later and we reached the main prize, the big giant dragon thing. I think we took care of it without too much difficulty, probably because the whole group was focused on saving Yuna and the fact that we didn’t have much time. Forget those energy drinks back home; a kidnapping is what gets us pumped.

 

“Cruud! Fa’na mucehk bufan!” Brother announced.

 

_Shoot! We’re losing power!_

Well, there goes a nice landing.

 

One exhilarating ride down a metal harpoon line later, and we have arrived just in time for the wondrous wedding ceremony. As wondrous a ceremony between a girl and a dead guy can be, anyway.

 

We proceed to fight our way through the guards, all of us set on reaching Yuna except maybe Wakka, who keeps blabbing on about how the Yevon guards have guns or “forbidden machina” or whatever.

 

Then, when we finally are within reach of the summoner…

 

“Stop!” yelled one of the maesters.

 

I could see Yuna pulling out her staff. Well, more like I could see a portion of a hand reaching what I assumed to be a staff, considering a rifle pointed at my forehead was blocking most of the view.

 

Seymour made that annoying laugh that he always does and says; “You would play at marriage just for a chance to send me? You’re resolve is admirable. All the more fitting to be my wife.”

 

Pyreflies began blocking my view as Yuna started to perform the sending.

 

Whoever was pointing the gun at my face cocked it. It’s a good thing to remember in these moments that apparently in Spira, you can pull a Seymour and _not_ die.

 

One of the maesters decided now was a good time to run his mouth. “Stop! Do you not value your friends’ lives? Your actions determine their fate…Protect them…or throw them away…”

 

I stopped listening at this point because of the shiny thing Rikku was pulling out of her pocket. It’s safe to say the Yevon guards weren’t expecting the little Al Bhed “heathen” to also be one of the world’s most skilled thieves, and so my guess is the way she managed to whip out that standard issue Al Bhed flash bomb within a fraction of a second came as a surprise to everyone except me.

 

And well, I was still totally impressed.

 

What happened next is hard to describe, considering all I _saw_ was white. But what I heard was pretty exhilarating. I could hear a “Wh-what was that?” followed by an “Al Bhed flash bomb!” from Wakka and Rikku, respectively. I could hear tons of surprised gasps and curses coming from the mouths of the guards, but what stood out the most was a cry from Yuna: “The Chamber of the Fayth!”

 

As our vision began to return I started following the red of Auron’s outfit, one of the first things my blurred eyesight was able to make out. I could tell Rikku was beside me, and the black and blue up ahead was clearly Lulu and Kimahri. I turned around briefly to examine the mess we left and was greeted with the sight of flustered maesters, baffled guards, and the most beautiful look of triumph on Yuna’s face.

 

With Seymour gone, this was going to be a piece of cake.


	20. Spiral of Death

It’s hard to believe the irony of our situation could be lost on anyone in our group. Here we were riding an elevator, a _machina_ , to descend into the depths of Bevelle’s temple. Bevelle, the capital of Spira and the center of the Yevon faith. This is the same faith that, among other things, prohibits the use of machina. Machina like _elevators_.

 

Still, no one said anything about it. Of course, I’m sure Wakka would be making some really interesting comments right about now if it weren’t for the fact that all of our attention was on Yuna.

 

“Yunie?” Rikku said, breaking the silence. “What’s next?”

 

Apparently Auron’s name is ‘Yunie’, as he answered, “We must get through the Cloister of Trials…and fast.”

 

[][]

 

“She’s been in there an awful long time don’t you think?”

 

I tried responding to Rikku’s question in a way that didn’t give away my own uneasiness. “It doesn’t seem longer than any of the other times she has been in the Chamber of the Fayth…”

 

…But it did seem longer. And it didn’t help that I could almost feel all of those Bevelle soldiers pressing their way towards us, mere seconds away from arriving and apprehending us. It didn’t help that we didn’t seem to have any feasible escape plan either.

 

A few more minutes pass and we all breath sighs of relief as the ornate entrance to the Chamber begins to open. The smiles our faces are short lived, however, as we hear the approach of the guards. Is it really necessary to point a rifle mere inches from your body? Are they afraid they’ll miss?

 

Maester Kinoc interrupted my irritation with a friendly, “You are to stand trial.”

 

Auron smirks. “I expect it will be a fair trial.”

 

Kinoc’s short laugh confirms what we already know: we’re as good as guilty.

 

[][]

 

He was still alive! Seymour stood on a balcony to our left, smiling that little pompous smile of his. I could have sworn Yuna had sent him…

 

Three other maesters along with Seymour stood at “our trial.”

 

"The High Court of Yevon is now in session. The sacred offices of this court seek nothing but absolute truth, in Yevon's name. To those on trial: Believe in Yevon, and speak only the truth."   
  
Lulu motions towards the talking Ronso in the balcony above. "Maester Kelk Ronso."   
  
The Ronso continues, "Summoner Yuna. You have sworn to protect the people of Yevon, true?"   
  
"Yes."   
   
"Then, consider: You have inflicted dire injury upon Maester Seymour Guado..."

 

Not dire enough, in my opinion

 

"…conspired with the Al Bhed and joined in their insurrection…"

 

What insurrection!? If I can recall, the Al Bhed were peacefully living in the desert they were forced into!

 

"These are traitorous and unforgivable crimes that disturb the order of Yevon. Tell this court what possessed you to participate in such violence."

 

Oh I don’t know, maybe the fact that Seymour is _insane_? Because Yuna wants to actually accomplish her duty as a summoner?   
  
It’s a good thing I wasn’t the one being addressed at this moment. Yuna gave a remarkably controlled response. "Your Grace...the real traitor is Maester Seymour! He killed his father Jyscal with his own hands!"   
  
"What is this!"

 

Apparently Kelk hadn’t attended the last evil Maester meeting. But it made sense, seeing as Kelk wasn’t omitting the creepy malicious vibe that was practically oozing out of the other maesters. The Ronso looked at Mika and then Seymour.

 

Seymour smiled. “Hmm…hadn’t you heard?”

 

Yuna continued. "Not only that...Maester Seymour is already dead! It is the summoner's sacred duty to send the souls of the departed to the Farplane! Grand Maester Mika... Please, send Seymour now!"   
  
Kelk stepped aside as Mika made his way to the edge of the balcony. "Send the unsent to where they belong?"  
  
”Yes!"   
  
"Send the dead...hmm?" Several pyreflies began to pour out of the maesters body. “You would have to send me, too."

 

Dying just isn’t what it used to be.

 

[][]

 

The cold feel of our jail cell --a cage suspended from the ceiling high above the ground-- compliments the echoing of Mika’s words in my head.

 

_“No matter how many summoners give their lives, Sin cannot be truly defeated. The rebirth cannot be stopped."_

 

Yuna had been so angry. _“All the people who have opposed Sin...their battles, their sacrifices--were they all in vain?"_

 

_“Not in vain. The courage of those who fight gives the people hope. There is nothing futile in the life and death of a summoner.”_

 

What was he saying? That summoners were here to sacrifice their lives so that people can just live in ignorant bliss? That no matter what happens, in the end, all of our journey and Yuna’s perseverance was worth nothing? Yuna…who knows where she is now…

 

I voiced my concern to my cellmate, Auron.

 

“She’s strong. She’ll make it.”

 

"She'll make it? What, so she can die?" I punched the floor of the cage. "Why is it...everything in Spira seems to revolve around people dying?"

 

“Ah the spiral of death.” Auron looked pensive. "Summoners challenge the bringer of death, Sin, and die doing so.” He looked at me, adding ”and Guardians give their lives to protect their summoner. The fayth are the souls of the dead. Even the maesters of Yevon are unsent. Spira is full of death. Only Sin is reborn, and then only to bring more death. It is a cycle of death, spiraling endlessly."

 

Auron wasn’t exactly the most uplifting cellmate. But I think I am starting to see why he is the way he is.

 

Our conversation is cut short as our executioner draws near.

 

[][]

 

With all the machina they have here you think Yevon’s most powerful leaders could come up with a better way to kill criminals. Instead we were just pushed into a pool of water that leads to who knows where.

 

I swim through the freezing cold water, not really knowing where I’m going. Luckily, it didn’t take very long before I ran into Wakka. “What’s our sentence?” I asked.

 

"Think they expect us to give up and die down here."

 

I laughed. “Well, that’s a lame way to kill someone.” We swam ashore to find Rikku in battle with a fiend. After a quick disperse of the monster we had a short reunion. I was glad to see she was alright, needless to say that I had been thinking of her since we got split into different jail cells.

 

“Are you alright?” she asked.

 

We might have had a nice moment right then if Wakka had a little more tact. “Where’s Yuna?” he asked. Rikku didn’t know.

 

“Let’s wait for her at an exit.” I suggested.

 

Rikku sighed. “If there is an exit…”


	21. Declaration

“I always thought this would be easier somehow. I thought that everyone would help me…with all my friends together beside me.”

 

A silent tear fell from the Summoner’s face, creating a ripple that spread throughout the entire lake.

 

“I’ve been trying so hard.”

 

We had escaped Bevelle with our skins intact, but Yuna had lost something, I could already tell. Her faith was shaken; Yevon had betrayed her. As I stood nearby in the water, I thought carefully about what I could say.

 

My mind went back to when I first arrived in Spira, when I first learned of a Summoner’s plight. The death of one would result in a brief period of Calm. I had opposed it adamantly at first; back then I would have gone with the Al Bhed on the summoner kidnapping missions myself. But now, staring at the shaken summoner, I think I finally began to understand Yuna.

 

I began to recall all the times when Rikku’s smile would light up a room. Home, before it had been destroyed, was a place of laughter and happiness, despite harsh conditions. If there was one thing I learned from the Al Bhed was that a moment’s happiness will get you through the bleakest moments in life. The fact that Rikku could still smile after seeing her home destroyed, the fact that the Al Bhed were still going to persevere…

 

And Yuna must have known this, in her own way. The fact that hope comes from those moments of Calm, of happiness, and that same hope sustains us through the death that Sin brings. And so, even though the opportunity presented itself, I could not make myself try to talk Yuna out of her journey, especially now when she was in her weakest moment.

 

“Maybe you’re trying too hard,” I put forward. She looked at me. “You don’t need Yevon. You have all of us. And we’re not going anywhere.”

 

Yuna nodded, acknowledging what I said. Still, I felt as though I could have done more.

 

“This may sounds crazy…but…the closer we get to Zanarkand is the closer we get to my home…”

 

Yuna nodded, knowingly. “Jecht had said that he was from Zanarkand…no one believed him besides my father and Auron…but…I did.”

 

I smiled. “Yeah, I can’t see anyone believing anything my crazy old man said. But, he was telling the truth I guess.” I moved closer to the summoner. “The thing is…even if there is no way for me to go home when we get to Zanarkand...I will go with you to the end.”

 

Yuna smiled at this. “I’ll continue. I must.”

 

I couldn’t think of anything more to say, so I did the only thing I thought might help. I gave her a hug. She was tense at first; I could tell it had taken her by surprise. But then she relaxed and returned the embrace.

 

After I hugged her I turned to leave.

 

“Wait!”

 

“Huh?”

 

“Thank you…Tidus.”

 

[][]

 

I ran into Rikku on my way back to the main camp. Before I could say anything she motioned for me to stay silent then led me by the hand into a small clearing.

 

“I saw you talking to Yuna!” she exclaimed.

 

“Yeah…” I scratched my head. “I know this probably isn’t what you want to hear but…I didn’t try-“

 

“To convince her to stop the pilgrimage?” she interrupted. “Yeah, I know you wouldn’t do that.” Oddly enough she didn’t seem at all disappointed.

 

“So, you’re not upset?”

 

Rikku draped her arms behind her head in classic Al Bhed fashion. “I want to stop Yunie from dying…but I don’t want to see her lose all hope! That’s not what we Al Bhed are all about!”

 

I laughed at this, despite the serious nature of the events of the past few days.

 

“Huh? Why are you laughing?”

 

“Because that’s the same conclusion I came to five minutes ago…”

 

Rikku smiled and then practically dragged me towards a rock that she promptly sat down upon. “I don’t want to talk about summoners or Yevon or anything like that for the rest of the night!” She proclaimed. “We can think about that stuff tomorrow, is what I say.”

 

I nodded, agreeing heartily. “Well then, what should we talk about?”

 

“Hmm…how about…you!”

 

“Me?”

 

“Yeah you, you big lug! We’ve been back together since the Moonflow and I haven’t heard you mention Zanarkand once! And that’s all you’d talk about at Home!”

 

“That’s not true, I didn’t talk about Zanarkand that much!”

 

“Yes it is, you were always like ‘Zanarkand this, Blitzball that.’”

 

I laughed, knowing that she was just teasing. “Well, maybe it’s just that Zanarkand is a terrific place, huh? Frankly, I think you’re just jealous that you’ve never been there.”

 

Rikku smiled, but the look on her face was a serious one. “I’d like to go there one day…”

 

“Rikku…”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“What’s up?” I didn’t mind our teasing and joking around, but to be honest it seemed a little out of place after what we had just been through. I could tell Rikku was trying to cover for something…

 

She looked at me in response to my questioning. Her eyes were not as bright as they usually were, despite the cheerful teasing from earlier. She took a few moments of silence before she put forward, “I saw you and Yunie.”

 

“Yeah, that’s what you said earlier…”

 

“I saw you hug her…” Her words were deliberate, as if every syllable was being forced into the air.

 

The hug? It was just a…just a hug. But I could see how Rikku might have interpreted it to mean…something. After all, with all the events of the past week all of our attention had been placed on the summoner, mine included. And I couldn’t deny that I felt something for Yuna; for her I had a deep respect and, I liked to think, we had an understanding.

 

With all the events of Bevelle, had I been focused on Yuna to the point where Rikku couldn’t see how I really felt?

 

She was looking away from me, having found something entirely captivating in the rocks populating Macalania Woods. I had carried these feelings in me for so long it was like second nature; it never occurred to me that Rikku might still be in the dark. My heart swelled; was her reaction to seeing the hug I shared with Yuna a confirmation that she had similar feelings?

 

I took her hand in mine, stealing her attention from the ground. Her eyes were clouded, but she maintained eye contact with me.

 

I explained to Rikku how I had fallen in love with her.


	22. The Calm before the Storm

“Where are we going?!” I shouted aloud, struggling for breath.

 

_The Calm Lands. Long ago, the high summoners fought Sin here._

_The Road ends here. Beyond, there’s no towns, no villages. Only endless plains._

“If I told you, this wouldn’t be so much fun!” Rikku replied, giggling excessively. “Come on!”

 

_Many summoners stray from their path and lose their way here._

We were running further and further away from our campsite; the light from the campfire was fading while the stars seemed to shine brighter and brighter. At this time of night everyone was already asleep, even Auron. But not Rikku.

 

The two of us were running barefoot; the feeling of the cool grass and soft ground upon my feet was second only to the sensation of Rikku’s hand in mine. I had no idea where she was leading me, but did it really matter? I would follow her anywhere.

 

I saw some deep shadows ahead, a sign that something lied beyond the touch of the starlight. We ran a little downhill and then as we got closer I perceived our destination to be a sort of rock overhang. It was still hard to make out in the darkness…but I wasn’t spending much time looking at our surroundings.

 

“I saw this today before we set up camp!” Rikku exclaimed.

 

I didn’t have any time to reply before I was literally pounced upon by my little thief, knocking both of us down onto the soft grass. We found ourselves entangled without any desire to come undone.

 

Looking at her then…she’s _beautiful_. I mean, she really is. And I’m not just saying this because at that moment she was lying on top of me, her body eclipsing the stars while the shadows danced across her face…no. She’s always beautiful.

 

And I had told her this, all of it, just last night. I told her of how when I wasn’t at Home she was the reason I was always in a hurry to return, of how when we were separated she had never left my thoughts, of how being around her made my heart race, of how…I was in love.

 

And she had listened patiently while I spoke, not saying a word, and then when I was done she said—

 

Rikku lightly punched my good shoulder. “Hey, are you listening?”

 

“Huh? Oh, yeah, yeah, I’m listening.” I replied sheepishly, my thoughts cut short.

 

While I was recalling the events of the past evening Rikku had moved to my side. Now both of us were lying on our backs, looking up towards the stars. Her head had found its way onto my shoulder and I was struck by how natural it felt to wrap my arm around her.

 

Rikku giggled. “Yeah, so anyways, what are we going to do?” Her expression turned serious as a smile disappeared. “Yunie’s not stopping, is she?”

 

I sighed. Yuna would go on with the pilgrimage to the bitter end, that was for sure. “Yuna’s…made her decision.”

 

Rikku shook her head. “I can’t just let her go!”

 

A feeling of fierce determination rose within me. “We won’t have to. We’ll save Yuna even is she calls the Final aeon.”

 

“But how…wait, Jecht? Your dad?”

 

I shrugged. “Maybe…maybe if I could just talk to him…”

 

Rikku tightened her grip on my hand. “You mean…talk to _Sin_ …”

 

I didn’t have any response and so we lay in silence for a little bit, our ears being filled with the sounds of the wind rushing through the vast Calm Land plains. The area was beautiful; in truth the name sums it up exactly. The Calm Lands were vast stretches of flat land that simply evoked peace. It was easy to suspend ourselves here, all of us including Yuna. The other side of the plains was where I was told the journey got hard, a path through the mountains followed by vast caverns. But now, we have time to rest, albeit briefly.

 

I gave my companion a slight nudge. “So, is this the reason you dragged me out here?” I said, obviously teasing. “To talk about our duty as guardians? You know I think I have some more important things to do…”

 

Rikku huffed and I could make out a pout forming on her face, one that was an obvious effort to contain a laugh. “You big meanie!” she cried, removing her hand from mine. Her smile couldn’t stay hidden for very long, however.

 

I laughed and reclaimed her hand. “Well then, what happens now?”

 

Rikku sat up a little bit and I followed suit. By this point I could recognize the rare times when the Al Bhed girl allowed herself to be truly serious.

 

After a bit of silence she said, “I didn’t sleep for two days after Operation Mi’ihen…when I thought you were dead. I can hide my emotions really well, I mean, _really_ well. But I couldn’t…even around Brother and Pop…I just cried. And when I could gain some control back I did the only thing I could think of…I decided to try as hard as I could to save Yunie. Sin was going to destroy her, the same way I thought he took you…”

 

She turned to look at me and the light of the stars highlighted the tears in her eyes.

 

“I mean, even if she defeated him, Sin still wins right? Because he comes back but Yunie doesn’t…”

 

A pause, and then her composition grew brighter. “And then I found you! You hadn’t broken your promise; you _did_ come back, well…sort of. I…it…when I saw you again…”

 

“Rikku—“

 

“That’s when I knew that I loved you.”

 

The night before she had barely gotten those words out, “I love you too…” before we heard a concerned Wakka walking towards us, calling out and asking if we were okay and if we had gotten lost. I cursed the blitzball player under my breath, although I knew he was only concerned because we had been gone from camp for so long… Nevertheless I went through an entire excruciating day, one of impatience and the longing for another chance…

 

So this time around, when she said it, I didn’t miss a beat.

 

I kissed her.

 

[][]

 

She had tasted of sunshine and the desert and of Home and the desert flowers that could only be found where the Al Bhed dwelled. She told me that I tasted like the sea and the waves, the sun and the beach. When we finally returned to the camp, I couldn’t sleep. But when my eyes did finally close I dreamt of the sun shining on the sea, the waves upon the desert dunes, and of desert flowers along a beach.

 

[][]

 

All of us enjoyed the time it took to cross through the Calm Lands. It took a good five days to cross all the way by foot, and they were a good five days of laughter and smiles and the sharing of memories. But at last we reached the two wooden bridges that would take us to the foot of Mt. Gagazet.

 

Here we made short work of a few Guado who attempted to block our way through the use of a rather impressive machina.

 

When the battle was over and Wakka had sighed, shaking his head at Yevon’s use of another machina, I posed a question to Lulu.

 

“Are they called the Calm Lands because they’re the Calm before the Storm?”

 

Lulu’s eyes held laughter. “Maybe,” she replied.

 

Rikku shuddered. “I hate storms!”

 


	23. Far From Home

If you want to know why the Ronso seem so tough, all you have to do is visit their home. Mt. Gagazet would eat you alive if you were even a hair bit weaker than the likes of Kimahri.

Of course, these other Ronso seem to doubt Kimahri's toughness. That's why I'm currently watching him and some Ronso named Biran fight over something stuck in the past.

I sigh as Kimahri proves his worth and gains his admission back into the Ronso homeland. We didn't get two steps out of the Calm Lands before we ran into a fight. Was that our last chance for peace before the ultimate battle that lies before us?

[][]

You have got to be kidding me. We climb up this freezing cold mountain under incredibly difficult conditions and what's waiting just when it seems Zanarkand is finally in grasp? Seymour.

Seymour, who I'm pretty sure we've killed at least 20 times by now. Okay that's a bit much, but at least twice.

Seymour, who just can't seem to live with the thought of Yuna and her guardians actually accomplishing what they are set on doing.

Seymour, with his Daddy issues—

"Ah, the son of Jecht," he says, reminding me of my own Daddy issues.

I don't skip a beat, "Rikku! Run ahead and tell Auron!"

She pauses, and gives me a look that nearly tears me apart. "You are not fighting him alone!"

My better instincts prevail as I shout, "Go! Just go!"

He killed the Ronso. Everyone last one of them, every single last one of them. All that remained was Kimahri; spear in hand, ears unable to shut out the truth of Seymour's claim.

"Yours was a truly gallant race. They threw themselves at me to bar my path. One…after another…" A smirk, then a laugh.

"No…"

Seymour addresses Yuna, "You could end the suffering of this poor Ronso."

"I don't understand you!" she replies.

"Allow Kimahri to die, and release him from his pain." He walks to the edge of the cliff and looks outward. "Spira is a land of suffering and sorrow caught in a spiral of death. To destroy—to heal—Spira, I will become Sin."

I got a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach as he says this, and I wonder about my Dad. Is this the path he went on…

No. My old man for all his flaws was not a crazy half Guado power hungry maniac. Which is why I didn't appreciate what Seymour said next.

"Once I have become the next Sin, your father will be freed again."

Bastard. "What do  _you_  know?!"

I ready my sword.

[][]

I'm not naïve enough to actually believe Seymour is dead, or that this was the last time we would be seeing him. He's gone now though, after a good old fashioned beat down. No hard earned rest for us, though.

Yuna looked forlorn. "He will become Sin…with my help," she says, with firmness.

Auron shook his head. "Lies. Forget them."

"If he becomes Sin, Sir Jecht will be saved!"

Auron turned back to our path. "We're leaving."

'You know something! Tell me!"

No response.

"Tell me!" Yuna cries, louder this time

I answer the question no one had yet to ask. And maybe they never  _would_  have asked. "Sin's…my old man."

"You hit your head or something?" Wakka says, concerned.

"Sin is my old man. My old man became Sin! I don't know how or why he did it. I felt him, inside, and when I did, I knew it was true. My old man is Spira's suffering…"

What to add to my confession? I mutter a weak "Sorry."

Yuna touched my arm. "Even…knowing that Sin is your father…Still you know, I must…

I stood up straight. "I know. Let's get him. I think my old man would want that."

"You'd fight your own father?" asked Lulu.

"Yeah. Yeah I would. No problem there."

Wakka tried to make sense of it, failed, and then resigned to simply ask, "Why…why'd all this have to happen?"

Good question Wakka, good question.

[][]

We set out once more on our trail. Rikku stays a bit behind the others, grasping my hand tightly to let me know she doesn't quite understand, and maybe never will, but she trusts me just the same.

"Do you believe me?" I whisper, my voice echoing off the cave walls. We had settled here for the night, up here on cold Mount Gagazet.

"Why wouldn't I believe you?" Rikku whispers back. Our hands are intertwined and bodies close, for warmth but then again, for something else entirely separate.

"Because ever since I showed up on your salvage ship nothing I've said has made very much sense. I spent all this time wanting to get to Zanarkand, to get home, but now we are so close and…"

"Kevd," she calls me by my Al Bhed nickname. "Ed femm ymm syga cahca cuuh, ugyo? E dnicd oui yht E ymfyoc ryja. Ajah frah ed caasc mega bnusecac fana pnugah, oui lysa pylg du sa nekrd? Oui'mm ymfyoc lusa pylg du sa..."

_It will all make sense soon, okay? I trust you and I always have. Even when it seems like promises were broken, you came back to me right? You'll always come back to me..._

I kiss her then, but it doesn't help that unsettled feeling I have inside. Like something is about to happen that is going to change all of it. Like I made one too many promises and now one of them is going to have to break…

Zanarkand is only a day's journey away. But I've never felt farther from home.


	24. Waking Up

It was beautiful and tragic at the same time, all these people trapped in what looks like a wall. I wondered how they got there, and why it seemed so…so…

 

“Those are fayth,” Yuna observed. She eyed them more carefully then gasped, “A summoning! Someone is using these fayth! Someone is drawing energy from all of them!”

 

Lulu stood in shock, along with the rest of us. “Who wields power on this scale, and what could they be calling?”

 

Auron kept quiet, a telling silence. Did anything _ever_ surprise him?

 

I was drawn to the wall; I simply gravitated towards it until finally I was within an arm’s reach. I wondered what it felt like, reaching out a hand—

 

[][]

[][]

 

It felt like ice, then warmth, and then my eyes felt like they were being blinded. Never in my life had I felt something like this, never.

 

I reached up to cover my face but it made no difference as I felt myself crumple to the ground.

 

[][]

[][]

 

When I got up again I could suddenly see perfectly. But I couldn’t believe my eyes.

 

I was home, in Zanarkand! Just as it was when I left…well, except, none of the damage Sin had inflicted could be seen. My mind raced, trying to figure out how I got here. In all honesty the further the pilgrimage with Yuna went the less I truly hoped I would ever return.

And, well, the deeper my relationship with Rikku went the less I truly desired to leave her.

 

Rikku. Where was she? And where was everyone else? My heart raced. Was it all a dream? No dream could be so vivid!

 

“Rikku!” I called out.

 

It was in this moment I noticed how quiet it was. There was no noise, only my voice echoing back from some faraway place. Maybe this was a dream? I looked around and saw lights on in the house. Putting aside all previous thoughts I made my way inside.

 

Waiting for me was that boy! The short one always surrounded in pyreflies, always showing up in the most random places…

 

“Welcome home,” he says.

 

“You…”

 

“Remember me? We met in Bevelle.”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“But that wasn’t the first time we met. I’ve known about your for a long time. A long, long time.”

 

I thought back. No, he was right; Bevelle was not the first time they had met. In fact, I’m pretty sure I’ve seen him in Zanarkand before…but…

 

“I feel like I know you, too.” I say. “Where are we?”

 

“Silly! Don’t recognize your own home?”

 

Suddenly the boy vanished, and a weird distorted image of Wakka appeared, surrounded by pyreflies. “What’s gotten into you?! Hey!!”

 

He disappears before I have a response and then there is a ghostly form of Rikku that appears on the opposite side of the room. “Wake up! Tiuds, wake up! Please…”

 

I jolt towards her but then she disappears. That look on her face, it was one of pure worry. Her words turn over in my mind. _Wake up!_

 

“Wait...this is a dream.”

 

The boy reappears. “Precisely.”

 

I think of Rikku and how anxious she and the others must be and I say, “Are you crazy? I don’t have time to be dreaming now!”

 

“You’re wrong.” A pause. “It’s not that you’re dreaming. You are a dream.”

 

What? “Wait a sec…”

 

[][]

[][]

 

There was a war, between Zanarkand and Bevelle. A thousand years ago, or so. Zanarkand had nothing in its power to stand up against Bevelle and its machine; the city’s summoners had no chance. And so those in Zanarkand decided to avoid complete oblivion…

 

“What did you do?”

 

“The remaining summoners and the townspeople that survived the war… They all became fayth… fayth for the summoning.”

 

“Sin!?”

 

“No. I mean this place. A Zanarkand that never sleeps. The dreams of the fayth summoned the memories of the city. They summoned all the buildings, all the people who lived there.”

 

I lived in Zanarkand. Was he saying that I…

 

He answered without me even having to ask. “Yes, you’re a dream of the fayth. You, your farther, your mother, everyone. All dreams. And if the fayth stop dreaming…”

 

It was hard to take in so fast. So many thoughts, questions, emotions. So what if I was a dream? It felt real enough!

 

“So what if I’m a dream! I like being here.”

 

The boy suddenly looked exhausted, tired beyond his apparent age. “We’ve been dreaming so long…we’re tired. Would you and your father…Would you let us rest? Both you and your father have been touched by Sin. Sin, the one around whom all Spira—the spiral—revolves.”

 

“What? What are you saying?”

 

He disappeared and then appeared much further away. “You two are more than just dreams now.”

 

I heard voices, like people shouting from a far distance “Wake up!” cried Yuna, but it sounded like a quiet whisper almost.

 

“Just a little more, and maybe…”

 

The boy turned to look at the view of Zanarkand.

 

“Maybe you are the dream that will end our dreaming at last.”

 

[][]

[][]

 

I woke up to find a worried Rikku kneeling beside me, leaning over my face with a heartbreaking expression on her face.

 

“Oui'na yfyga! Ur, hajan tu dryd ykyeh. Hu, hu, oui lyh'd ajan tu dryd ykyeh!" she cried.

 

_You're awake! Oh, never do that again. No, no, you can't ever do that again!_

From behind Rikku I heard a collective sigh of relief from the rest.

 

Everyone asked if I was okay, as I stood up and brushed myself off. It was a very good question. Was I okay? What had just happened?

 

Yuna asked that very question. “What happened?”

 

I couldn’t explain now. Could I ever explain?

 

_You two are more than just dreams now_ …

 

“Nothing,” I lied. “I…blacked out. I was dreaming. Then I woke up!” Well, it was the partial truth.

 

Everyone eyed me warily, but most moved on after a moment’s pause. Not Rikku though. I avoided eye contact.

 

We began to journey further through Mount Gagazet.

 

[][]

[][]

 

 

 

“What really happened back there?”

 

Rikku waited until we had travelled a bit further from the wall of dreaming fayth to question me. We were a bit head of all the others, and we found a private moment.

 

We strolled along in silence and finally I said, well, nothing of substance.

 

“It’s…complication I guess.” I shrugged my shoulders.

 

Rikku looked hurt, but what should I do? Do I tell her? She’s already racking her head, trying to find a way to save Yuna. It would almost be cruel to try and repeat what the Fayth had shared with me.

 

So I’m a dream huh? It rang true, as true as the fact that Sin was my dad. Did this mean when we defeated my old man both he and I would just, up and disappear? How was I any different than these other Guardians, than our summoner? I _felt_ real.

 

I took Rikku’s hand in mine, an impulse. I could feel her. It was cold on Mount Gagazet and our hands radiated heat, even through the gloves we both wore. And yet… I’m just a dream?

 

“Rikku…”

 

“Kevd?”

 

I loved it when she called me by my Al Bhed nickname. All the Al Bhed had called me that back at Home and it brought back some good memories. That, and since we were so far from Home it had become almost like Rikku’s special name for me.

 

“What if this was all a dream? What if I am actually in my Zanarkand right now, sleeping in my room, on my bed? What if Sin, Spira, Summoners, all of it were just a dream? What if I wake up when we get to Zanarkand?”

 

We walked further in silence, the howling winds of Mount Gagazet drowning out all other noise.

 

“Well, if this is just a dream, then I guess I’m just glad you haven’t waked up yet.” She squeezed my hand.

 

I stopped right there and turned to face her. She looked so small and young, but why did she keep saying things that revealed such a depth of person, such…understanding?

 

Her mother, Yuna, and now me…? Was she to lose everything in this story?

 

She let me stare for a while, and then she began to blush. We could hear the others approaching behind us but they were still out of sight.

 

“I don’t want to wake up, but I don’t think I have a choice. But let’s keep dreaming together, okay Rikku?” I smiled, all of a sudden quite happy. We’d figure this out. I kissed her quickly, but with a kind of intensity and desperation I hadn’t had before. I kissed her as if there was only a few more times I would get the chance to.

 

Once she’d recovered from my advance she flashed a bright smile.

 

A dream huh? Anything can happen in a dream, right?


	25. My Story

_Listen to my story._

_This may be our last chance **.**_

I guess this is my story, isn’t it? If you had asked me in the Calm Lands, or anywhere before my encounter at the wall of Fayth, I wouldn’t have thought so. I thought this was Yuna’s story. I thought this about her journey and her guardians. Or maybe it was a story about the Al Bhed somehow finding a way to defeat Sin in the face of opposition from the rest of Yevon-loving Spira.

But this isn’t just their story.

This is my story now too. Sin is Jecht, Jecht is Sin. And both my father and I are dreams of the fayth. When we get to Zanarkand… well I’m not sure how this is going to work out but I am going to see my Dad. And he and I are going to end this.

[][]

We’re standing at the edge of Zanarkand. A city dead for a thousand years. A city I had to see with my own eyes.

I look over at Yuna and she is staring at Zanarkand too, lost in her own thoughts. It’s the end of her journey as well. I couldn’t even imagine what she is thinking.

My thoughts, they keep floating up, and then slipping through my fingers. Slipping away before I can pin them down with words.

"Yuna, I say no!" Rikku’s words are like gravity, bringing my thoughts crashing back to the ground. If we go down there, then you'll..."   
  
Yuna lowered her gaze. "Rikku… You're a true friend, and I thank you, but..." She paused. "I must go... down, to Zanarkand."   
  
Rikku lowered her voice to almost a whisper. “I'm not saying we shouldn't go. But shouldn't we think about it some more?" Then, with the kind of enthusiasm she always finds a way to generate, "There's gotta be some kind of way we can save you, Yuna!"   
  
Yuna gave a sad smile in response. "All my life, I knew this moment would come."   
  
“Yunie…”

This interaction was… hard to watch. I still haven’t quite wrapped by head around what I learned from the dream and my conversation with the Fayth. But I could sense my story was getting closer to its end. I felt like my destiny had become intertwined with Yuna’s somehow. Rikku’s attempts to delay Yuna… I felt the same kind of desire to delay whatever lay ahead for myself. But why?

[][]

“Are you alright?’

This was a loaded question. Everyone knows I haven’t been myself since I had passed out at the wall of the fayth. Then again, as we progressed past Mt. Gagazet and finally arrived at the outskirts of Zanarkand it wasn’t like anyone was in what you might call a ‘good mood.’

Maybe Rikku was asking me this because we were trudging through the ruins of Zanarkand, the remains of what used to be my home. To be honest I thought it would be more difficult to see it like this… but for some reason it made sense to me. All this time trying to get back to Zanarkand, but in the back of my mind I knew. I knew that when we got here we weren’t going to see my old digs, or the Abes’ blitzball stadium. I knew that we were marching towards death.

“Helloooo? Anybody home?” Rikku gave my right arm a slight tug. For a moment I smiled to myself, knowing that she still avoids my previously injured left arm. It’s been more than healed but… she’s Rikku. She’s always thinking about everyone but herself.

“I’m sorry, Rikku.” I say. God knows what I’m actually apologizing for. For being silent? For failing to tell her that my journey stops here too?

Rikku scrunches up her face in that cute way that I love. “Sorry for what? You don’t have anything to be sorry for. Tidus…. we’re here in Zanarkand and—“

“—it’s a wasteland. Not exactly what I had wanted to see. But you know Rikku… I… I’ve had a long time to prepare myself for this moment. But you… your home was just destroyed.”

Rikku’s demeanor changed as I said these words. Her eyes took on this quality that I knew meant she was drawing inward, thinking. Like always, it wasn’t long before she was back with her trademark positivity. “You big lug…” she said, tugging on my arm again. “Home can be rebuilt. Pop’s already got plans and plans. You don’t think we didn’t prepare for an attack like the one that happened?”

When I don’t say anything in reply she continues, “Yeah, Home will be rebuilt. But this…” she motions to the crumbling buildings surrounding us on all sides. “I don’t think this can be…well…it must be hard to see your home so…”

“Home?” I say. “What did I have here anyway, besides blitzball? I had rotten memories of my dad that’s what. I had friends…who would have dumped me in a heartbeat if I ever got cut from the Zanarkand Abes.” I shrugged.

“Yeah, but still—“

“Rikku, I wish my home could be with the Al Bhed. I have friends now, purpose. And I have… well… you.”

She smiled at me.

This whole time while talking Rikku and I had been walking through the rubble. Unlike many of our previous conversations we were definitely within earshot of the rest of the group. But I didn’t care. Let them know how much I cared for her.

We walked along a little bit further until Rikku brought us to a halt. “Wait, what do you mean you _wish_ your home could be with the Al Bhed?

“What? Oh, I mean, I just… I just meant... I mean I misspoke. My home _is_ with the Al Bhed now.”

“You are such a bad liar.”

She was right, of course. I have to tell her soon or she’s going to get it out of me one way or another. I just need a little more time…

[][]

I probably shouldn’t be surprised by anything anymore. But who would have thought the old Zanarkand Abes’ stadium would be housing the chamber of the fayth? I mean what are the odds?

As we approach the remains of the long destroyed stadium, a man is there to greet us.  
  
"Journeyer of the long road, name yourself."   
  
Yuna replies, "I am the summoner Yuna. I have come from the island of Besaid."   
  
The old man approaches her and gives her a good hard look. "Your eyes, my dear. Show me the long road you have travelled."

Yuna raises her head.

The old man seemed to be pleased by whatever it was he saw. "Very good. You have journeyed well. Lady Yunalesca will surely welcome your arrival. Go to her now, and bring your guardians with you. Go.”

[][]

As we make our way to the Chamber of the Fayth the pyreflies keep gathering and showing us visions of the past. Previous summoners and their guardians. Even a young Seymour. I hate to say it but seeing this young Seymour tearfully say goodbye to his mother made even me sympathize a little bit. Of course, this feeling of empathy passed as soon as I remembered the kind of monster he became.

Most interesting of all were the scenes being played out all around us featuring Lord Braska, my old man, and a young Auron.

It was interesting to see… a softer side to my old man. “Hey, Braska,” his ghost says. "You don't have to do this."   
  
Yuna’s father seemed unmoved. "Thank you for your concern."   
  
"Fine. I said my piece."   
   
A young Auron interjected, "Well, I haven't! Lord Braska, let us go back! I don't want to see you...die!"

Braska replied, "You knew this was to happen, my friend."   
  
"Yes, but I... I cannot accept it."   
  
The high summoner gave out a hollow laugh. “Auron, I am honored that you care for me so. But I have come to kill grief itself. I will defeat Sin, and lift the veil of sorrow covering Spira.” He pauses. “Please understand, Auron."

Looking over at real-life Auron I was suddenly aware of how old he looked. This was a man younger than my old man. But the lines of his face, his scars, even his voice would make you think he had been wandering Spira for a thousand years. Is he really only 10 years older than the Auron we just saw?

I don’t know what to say at this moment, but you know me. I open my big mouth anyway. “But he didn’t really defeat Sin, did he?”

Auron simply laughed. “No. No he most definitely did not.”

It was a hollow laugh.

[][]

So this is it. This is the big moment, the time when everything gets pieced together and the truth of what needs to be done is laid out for all to see.

As Lady Yunalesca explains the process by which a summoner’s guardian must be chosen to become the final summoning, I can see the looks of shock on everyone’s faces. Well, everyone besides Auron.

No, it’s not just the summoner who has to sacrifice themselves. It’s one of the guardians too. Two lives are the price that’s paid for a little bit of Calm.

I was shocked too… but in a different way. I felt like my mind was finally able to put the big puzzle pieces together. I could see it all so clearly now. Jecht, my old man, did something selfless for once in his life. He joins this relative stranger on a pilgrimage and then, by the end of it, goes and sacrifices himself.

What was his plan? I knew this man. So stubborn, so prideful. A jerk really. But never a quitter. He had to have had a plan. Or, well, maybe it was just that he was so full of himself he figured he could change things all on his own?

In any case, we are all left with the uneasy question: what happens now?

Lady Yunalesca, who by the way easily wins the prize for creepiest one thousand year old dead lady, has finally finished babbling on about how "a thousand years ago, I chose my husband Zaon as my fayth” and “our bond was true” and how “death is the ultimate and final liberation blah blah blah.”

After finishing her speech Lady Yunalesca turns and walks away… and almost as if on cue we get another ghost memory scene of Braska, Auron, and my old man:

We see a young Auron protest all of what is happening, but Lord Braska does not relent.

My old man gives a short laugh. “This is the only way we got now! Fine. Make me the fayth.”

Jecht turns and looks at Auron, says "I been doing some thinking. My dream is back in the other Zanarkand. I wanted to make that runt into a star blitz player. Show him the view from the top, you know. But now I know there's no way home for me. I'm never going to see him again. My dream's never gonna come true."

All this talk about dreams and the other Zanarkand… did my dad know? Did he get the same message that I did at the wall of the fayth?

My old man keeps going: “So make me the fayth. I'll fight Sin with you, Braska. Then maybe my life will have meaning, you know."   
  
“Don't do this, Jecht!" Auron pleads. His words keep reminding me of Rikku. It’s an odd connection for my mind to make, but... I feel like I am hearing a conversation that the two of us are about to have. "If you live... there may be another way! We'll think of something, I know!"   
  
In this moment we all get to witness by old man’s trademark stubbornness. “Believe me, I thought this through. Besides... I ain't gettin' any younger, so I might as well make myself useful."   
  
“Jecht.” Lord Braska interjects.  
  
"What! You're not gonna try to stop me, too?"   
  
Braska lowers his head. "Sorry. I mean...thank you."   
  
 My old man shrugs it off as if he didn’t even hear it. He turns back to Auron. "Braska still has to fight Sin, Auron. Guard him well. Make sure he gets there. Well, let's go."  
  
They start to walk away but Auron tries just one last time. He says, “Sin always comes back. It comes back after the Calm every time! The cycle will continue and your deaths will mean nothing!"   
  
Jecht gives him a trademark shrug. "I understand what you're saying, Auron. I'll find a way to break the cycle."

"You have a plan?"

"Trust me, I'll think of something."

As the pyreflies disperse and the images of our predecessors fade my eyes meet up with Rikku’s. A powerful, inexplicable feeling overwhelms me. How many times did Rikku say the same words that just came out of Auron’s mouth? And how many times did I tell her that I would ‘think of something?’

[][]

Lulu is the first: "If one of us has to become a fayth... I volunteer."  
  
And then Wakka: "Me too, Yuna!"

Without thinking my hand turns into a fist. The pressure of the moment is weighing down on me and I almost can’t take it. A quick glance from Rikku tells me she is noticing my tension... though the puzzled look on her face must match the one on my own. What is going on with me?

It’s like I feel swept up in what is happening… but at the same time I’m resisting it. Something is trying to push me on a certain course. Something beyond myself is telling me that it is _my_ turn to volunteer.

Funny. My old man disappears at sea 10 years ago, somehow ends up Braska’s guardian and _then_ ends up becoming Sin itself. Now here I am, Jecht’s son somehow ending up Braska’s daughter’s guardian… and it would make a lot of sense right? Lulu, Wakka, Kimahri… these are all good people. They don’t deserve to die. They’ve got homes to go back to and all I’ve got are all these ruins. It should be me shouldn’t it? Just like my old man…

Except… things didn’t go the same for me. I probably would have still been in these Zanarkand ruins if I hadn’t been rescued. Rescued by the Al Bhed, who were only in the area because they were looking for a _different_ way to defeat Sin. I would have never met Rikku, and I would have never have seen an alternative to Yevon’s teachings and summoner sacrifices. What if they hadn’t found me? What if _she_ hadn’t found me?

This isn’t my old man’s story. This is my story. And I’m not going to follow my dad’s footsteps. When I was playing blitzball I wasn’t planning on just doing what my dad did. I was going to get better than he ever was, break his records, show him and everyone who could see that I wasn’t him.

No, I’m not going to become Sin. I’m going to do what my old man never could.

When I finally say something out loud I find that I’m shouting. "This still won't change anything, you know!” I yell at Wakka and Lulu. “You'd bring the Calm, and then what? That won't break the cycle!"   
  
Wakka looks over at Yuna and then back to me. "Listen... You wanna defeat Sin and keep Yuna alive? You don't want Sin to come back, ya?" He shrugs. “That is just not gonna happen, brudda, you know?"   
  
Lulu adds, "If you want everything, you'll end up with nothing."   
  
I shake my head. “What Auron said about there being a way...I think it's true.” I look at the guardians around me. “This might not make sense… but… _this is my story_.”

Everyone just keeps starting and all the tension in me feels like it’s going to explode until…

“You’ll “think of something”?”

Rikku’s words. She’s quoting my old man.

God dammit, I love her.

“”Trust me”.” I quote back.

[][]

Without any time to contemplate the only thing I can think to do is opposite of what my old man must have done. I’m going to go tell Lady Yunalesca “no”. I announce my plan to talk to Yunalesca and start running up the stairs.

“Wait!” Yuna’s voice freezes me in my tracks.

"You say it's your story, but it's my story, too, you know?” she says, her words pouring out lie she’d been bottling them up the entire pilgrimage. “It would be so easy... to let my fate just carry me away… following this same path my whole life through.”

‘Fate carry me away’ she said… hearing her words I can see now that Yuna is feeling a tension too.

"But I know now...I can't. What I do, I do... with no regrets."

I feel close to Yuna in this moment. Our paths have intersected, and now we’re both making a choice that’s about to send us flying in a new direction.

[][]

One thing about Yuna… one she’s made a decision you certainly can’t question her resolve. When we get to Yunalesca she is asking the questions before I even get a chance to think about what to say.

"Have you chosen the one to become your fayth?" Lady Yunalesca asks, "Who will it be?"

Yuna shoots back. "Might I ask something first? Will Sin come back even should I use the Final Summoning to defeat it?"   
  
Yunalesca emotionless tone matches her dead stare. "Sin is eternal. Every aeon that defeats it becomes Sin it its place...And thus is Sin reborn. Sin is an inevitable part of Spira's destiny. It is never-ending."   
  
"Never-ending?" Wakka repeats, in disbelief.

Lulu and Yuna appear shocked as well, although it’s Lulu who says, "This...this cannot be! The teachings state that we can exorcise Sin with complete atonement! It's been our only hope all these years!"   
  
"Hope is...comforting. It allows us to accept fate, however tragic it might be.”

I suppose this is probably Lady Yunalesca’s umpteenth time explaining this to a group of guardians but she sounds like boredom is what killed her, not summoning her husband’s fayth.

She adds, “Yevon's teachings and the Final Summoning give the people of Spira hope. Without hope, they would drown in their sorrow. Now, choose. Who will be your fayth?"   
  
When the moment comes… its Yuna’s decision. And that feels right. I think it was always supposed to be hers. Here at the end of her journey… this is her moment. Mine… well, mine is still to come.

"No one." Yuna closes her eyes. "I would have gladly died… I live for the people of Spira, and would have gladly died for them. But… the Final Summoning... is a false tradition that should be thrown away."

Then, with eyes open. "My father... My father wanted... to make Spira's sorrow go away. Not just cover it up with lies!"

Yunalesca starts running her mouth about us ‘throwing out hope’ and how she’s going to ‘liberate us from despair’ and whatnot but we aren’t listening. We’re readying our weapons.

[][]

We actually did it. We defeated Yunalesca. Of course, she wasn’t about to let us enjoy our victory.

"Fool! There is no other way. Even if there was... Even if you did destroy Sin... Yu Yevon the immortal would only create Sin anew."   
  
"Yu Yevon?" I ask.

What was she talking about? Who is Yu Yevon? I guess we’ll never know, because that would be the last thing Yunalesca says before her body vanishes.

Yuna stares in disbelief. "I cannot believe what we just did."

I’m in a similar state of astonishment but… well, there’s no going back now. “Let’s do something even more unbelievable.”

Rikku asks, “What?”

“We’re going to destroy Sin without the final aeon. And I know how.”

Rikku probably doesn’t know it yet, but the Al Bhed are about to save the world.


	26. No Regrets

I can’t even remember the last time I got a moment to sit down.

The distant hum of the engines permeates everywhere you go in the Airship, including the little cabin that has become my room. It’s comforting actually. Everything in Zanarkand used to emit a kind of low hum, a side effect of all the machina running day and night non-stop. If I close my eyes it almost feels like I’m back there again…

Well, of course, we _are_ in Zanarkand. Floating above it in an airship the Al Bhed salvaged and then made their own. It was this airship that came and picked us up out of the ruins after our defeat of Lady Yunalesca.

It was good to be back amongst the Al Bhed again. Not that there had been much time to reconnect with old friends; once we got on board and arrived at the bridge we had to face the question of what to do next. “Frana? Frana?” Brother had started asking, almost immediately.

_Where? Where?_

""Where, where?" That all you can say?" Rikku had snapped. "Why don't you think of something!?"

I felt a little bad for Brother but I can’t blame Rikku for responding that way. We had just destroyed the only known path to defeating Sin and were now tasked with finding an alternative. The stress of what we had just endured in the Zanarkand ruins could be clearly seen on the faces of all of the guardians.

Cid, on the other hand, seemed quite pleased with the situation. “Well aren’t we a happy bunch!” he said, upon our arrival.

The last time I had seen Rikku’s father was when he was ordering Home to be destroyed. We were all frantically panicking, not knowing where Yuna was, but Cid was as cool as can be. I remember him declaring, “ _No hare-brained law or teaching can send my little niece to her death! When I save her, I'll make her give up being a summoner quicker than a desert melts ice!_ _”_

I don’t know if I was anticipating a touching family reunion between an uncle and his niece but I wasn’t really expecting what did happen. Yuna had approached Cid and at first the two locked gazes without saying a word. Then Yuna bowed, but Cid responded by turning his back to her. Yuna didn’t seem hurt by this; I think for an interaction without words a lot was said between the two.

Shortly after this Yuna had left along with most of the other guardians, which left myself, Rikku and the Al Bhed crew on the bridge. Oh, and let’s not forget Cid.

Normally the idea of talking with a guy like Cid wouldn’t stress me out. But this is Rikku’s father, and I had absolutely no idea what he would say to me. Did he know the extent of my relationship with is daughter? I exchanged a glance with Rikku who gave me an encouraging nod in response.

Cid gave me a full once over. “So… you’re the one running around saving my people, huh? First you save my numbskull son over here from near certain death and then you manage to save my determined-to-die niece as well?”

I gave a hesitant nod in response. Cid laughed a kind of belly laugh that was warm and intimidating at the same time.

“Well you’ve just earned yourself a seat on the battle plan committee. We’ve got a giant monster out there that needs destroying and I’m told you’ve got a knack with machina.”

His words put me slightly more at ease. It wasn’t exactly a big warm ‘welcome to the Al Bhed family’ bear hug but it wasn’t a rejection either.

Cid looked over at Rikku. “Oui’na cina?” he asked. “Get ryc cbihg pid dra Al Bhed meva yeh’d ayco. Ec ra duikr ahuikr?”

_You_ _’re sure? Kid has spunk but the Al Bhed life ain_ _’t easy. Is he tough enough?_

Something in his tone had reminded me of my old man and the way he used to tease me. Before Rikku had a chance to reply I found myself reacting out loud:

“Hey, I’m pretty sure I’ve got what it takes, Gramps!”

There was a moment of painful silence and then… I heard Rikku giggle and Cid let out a huge guffaw.

“Gwah hah ha, I think I like this kid,” Cid said, to no one in particular. “Well then, what are you doing in that ragtag crusader outfit? Go see Buddy and get yourself some proper Al Bhed clothes. Then I suggest you go get some rest… tomorrow we’re gettin’ down to business.”

[][]

[][]

After a quick round of the airship and checking in with the other guardians I made a beeline for the cabin room that had been assigned to me. What with the day I had I didn’t waste any time heading to bed. I was just about to nod off and get some much needed sleep when I received a little visit from Rikku.

Sometimes I forget this girl is a world class thief. I hadn’t heard her open the door to my cabin, and I wasn’t even aware of her approaching the bed until she was climbing in.

“Rikku!?” I exclaimed

“Shhhh! Not so loud silly!”

“What are you doing here?” I asked, lowering my voice.

“What do you think you big lug? I’m sleeping over!” she said with a grin. She gave me a little push. “Move over, would ya?”

Her brazenness made me blush. Not that I wanted her to leave, it’s just that this was a little different than drawing our sleeping bags up next to each other for warmth while travelling up Mt. Gagazet.

“Rikku… is this such a good idea? Isn’t Brother in a cabin a few doors down? And… and…”

“Oh, don’t worry about Pops.”

“Oh, I most definitely worry about Cid!”

Rikku shushed me again. “Then keep your voice down!” She settled down in to the bed and pulled up alongside me on my right.

At the risk of sounding redundant I asked her again, “What are you doing here, Rikku?”

She pouted in response. “You know, some guys actually like it when their girlfriends climb into bed with them…”

Huh, I think that might have been the first time she called herself my girlfriend. I won’t deny it made me happy. I try hard not to grin like an idiot.

I make an effort to come up with a clever reply. “Well… something tells me you are here for reasons beyond fulfilling an overwhelming need to cuddle.”

“Cuddle?” Rikku says in response. “I’m not here to cuddle,” she says, kissing me in the process.

Ooookay, keep it together Tidus. A girl in your bed making out with you _sounds_ nice. But her father, the intimidating leader of an entire people who also happens to be in near proximity of these thin-walled airship cabins, is probably not the kind of man who wants to be woken up by the sounds of a guy making out with his daughter.

But Rikku doesn’t let up. Her intensity is doing a number on me and I’m having a hard time holding myself back. I try desperately to think on other things. Zanarkand Ruins. Sin. Seymour. Chocobos.

“Hey, where’s your head at you big meanie!?” Rikku says, interrupting her kisses.

“Sorry… I was just thinking of Zanarkand… and Sin,” I reply, which is sort of true. I won’t mention _why_ I was focusing my attention on these things at the moment.

My words cause Rikku to grow a bit more serious in demeanor. “Yeah… you know we haven’t really gotten a chance to talk since what happened in Zanarkand… that’s why I had wanted to come and see you.”

“See, I knew there was something more…“ I say teasingly, before Rikku interrupts.

“Kevd, what’s going on?”

Her use of my Al Bhed nickname brings me to a more somber state of mind. I know that Rikku tends to refer to me in this way in our more serious conversations.

“What do you mean?” I ask.

“Something isn’t adding up, you know?” she said. “We did it, we saved Yunie and now we’re going to figure out a way to beat Sin without any summoners and guardians from ever having to die for stupid Yevon!” She pauses, thinking. “But us defeating Sin is going to depend on you and the fact that Sin is your dad. How is that going to work? Are you going to fight him yourself?”

“I… I don’t know yet. Maybe? We have to destroy Sin… whether or not he’s my old man.”

“Right… but I just… want to know that you’ll be safe okay?”

“Safe?”

Rikku props herself up and looks at me with a concerned expression. We’re positioned in such a way that I’m lying on my back while she lies on her side, facing towards me. The dim lighting drapes us both in shadow but I can still make out her eyes, which never fail to captivate me.

“All this time I’d been thinking of saving Yunie. How we had to make her stop her pilgrimage before she sacrificed herself. But I never really thought about how… well… now that Yunie’s pilgrimage is over…” Rikku’s face betrays a kind of sadness I am not used to seeing from her. “Tidus, you can’t do anything stupid okay? Don’t be a bit stupid meanie, okay? After all we worked for don’t go… sacrifice yourself okay?”

“Hey… hey Rikku no… don’t worry okay?” I say, my free hand reaching for her face. “I’m not going to do anything stupid…”

Well… I guess that depends on how you define ‘stupid’. I know I should probably tell her about how I am a dream of the fayth. And how the fayth told me that they are tired of dreaming. But who knows what that means when it comes to me facing off against my old man?

Besides, in this moment there is nothing in me other than the impulse to make the girl next to me feel happy, loved, and secure.

My days in Spira thus far have all been about going backwards: Back to Zanarkand. Back to Home. They’ve been about stopping forward progress: Stop Yuna from getting married to Seymour. Stop Yuna from completing her suicide pilgrimage. There’s been so little time to think about the future, let alone strive towards it. Zanarkand was the end of my story, or so I thought.

But now I find myself starting to entertain the idea of a future. That is, the kind of future that includes the girl lying next to me. I know I shouldn’t let myself start thinking this way. I don’t know what exactly is going to happen next but chances are there aren’t many chapters left in my story.

Out of my memory comes a conversation Rikku and I once had, a long time ago back when we were in the desert, at Home. During one of our Al Bhed Psyches blitzball practices a teammate name Eigaar had been talking about a girl he intended to ask to marry. I had brought it up in conversation with Rikku later, because it struck me as a little bit odd; Eigaar was a year younger than myself.

_“Isn_ _’t he a little young to get married?_ _”_ I had said.

Rikku had simply shrugged in response. _“Some people marry really young in Spira, you know._ _”_

_“You mean people our age are getting married?_ _”_

_“Yeah, Fiends are around, and there_ _’s always Sin, right? One of them might get you, you know?_ _”_ She paused, then, “ _Lots of people marry the first person they fall in love with, just like that!_ _”_

_“Really?_ _”_

_“I_ _’ll probably be the same way,_ _”_ she added. I thought I had noticed Rikku blush with those words but the next moment she was back to her chipper self. _“But if you ask me I don_ _’t think Eigaar has a chance with her_ _…”_

Her words from this conversation keep playing over and over in my mind until an intense look from Rikku takes me out of my contemplative state. She too had been lost in thought, but now she looks as if she had just made up her mind about something.

 

“What are you thinking about?” I ask.

 

“Well… when I thought you were dead… after Operation Mi’ihen… I thought a lot about what I wish I had gotten the chance to say or do with you,” she says. “I thought about how we had never kissed and I had always wanted to, back when we were at Home.”

  
I smile and lean over to give her a quick kiss. “Well then, I guess you’ve gotten what you’ve always wanted,” I say lightheartedly.

“I didn’t like the feeling of having regrets,” Rikku continues, her focus undeterred by my playfulness. She’s grinning now, and I sense a mood shift.

“I didn’t either, back when we were separated,” I offer in reply, not knowing what else to say.

It doesn’t occur to me what she is truly getting at until Rikku begins shifting and moves on top of me. Without much effort she positions herself so that she straddling me; her hands rest on my loose fitting Al Bhed shirt while those green eyes peer down at me.

“Rikku?” I say, surprised.

She smiles at me. It’s an unsure but determined smile. “After we face Sin… I don’t want to have any regrets, okay?”

My mind finally catches up to the situation at hand. I think very carefully about what to say to her in this moment. I could lie, and tell her that she has nothing to worry about. I could tell her that there won’t be anything to regret because we’ll have plenty of time to do the many things people in love get to do once this business with Sin is over and done with. And I could kiss her but then gently push her off of me and tell her that these things shouldn’t be rushed into.

But even without telling her the truth about me being a dream of the fayth… Rikku has lived her whole life in Spira. There is no future guarantee for anyone here.

_Yeah, Fiends are around, and there_ _’s always Sin, right? One of them might get you, you know?_

“You’re thinking too much,” Rikku says, kissing me again. Her hands begin wandering without bothering to wait for my response. The top few buttons of my shirt come undone and her left hand begins tracing the scar I received from that ice monster back at Macalania Temple.

_Lots of people marry the first person they fall in love with, just like that!_

“You know, it’s not that complicated,” she adds, her voice louder now, more confident. “I want this and I’m not going to regret it.”

_I_ _’ll probably be the same way._

She’s right, of course. When I stop thinking and overcomplicating things I realize that the very beautiful girl that I’m in love with is currently in my bed, working to take my shirt off.

I decide to lend her a hand.

[][]

[][]

“Okay your turn!”

“Umm… okay… your favorite color?”

“Hey you big lug you should know this by now! Blue! Like your eyes…”

“Yeah, you’re right I already knew that. Okay your turn.”

“Okay…. Ummm…”

“How did I get these perfect abs? Well let me tell you a little story— hey ow! No hitting! I’m still naked over here!”

“Don’t interrupt my turn, meanie!”

“Ha ha okay okay. What do you want to know?”

“….Tidus, how many girlfriends did you have… you know, back in Zanarkand?”

“How many? Ha, I never had a girlfriend. Well, none unless you count blitzball."

"Naymmo? I can't imagine the ' _star player of the Zanarkand Abes'_ being single."

_Really?_

"Believe it Rikku. I mean I had my fair share of female fans... but I was obsessed with beating my old man's legacy no matter what. Blitz was my one true love. Well, until now."

"Now?"

"Now... Drana'c uhmo oui.”

_There's only you._


	27. The Things We Carry

When I wake up the next morning she is already gone. A literal thief in the night. For a moment I’m afraid it was all just a dream but then I notice the little black holster bag that Rikku usually keeps strapped on to her right leg lying on the floor next to the bed.

I _definitely_ remember helping her take that off last night.

I’m amazed at how relaxed I feel. It turns out if you’ve got a lot on your mind it’s useful to have a night where you can give something else your undivided attention. Or _someone_ else.

Lying there in my bed, before we both fell sleep, we just talked about anything and everything. After months on the pilgrimage with Yuna and countless conversations about how to stop her, it was nice to finally change the subject.

Rikku reminisced a little about Home and I shared about life growing up in Zanarkand, yet for some reason the reality of our two destroyed homes didn’t weigh on me. In those moments I think maybe the two of us had found a new kind of home.

I could probably keep replaying the memory of the previous night over and over again in my mind, but instead I reluctantly get up and get dressed. I wake up gradually during this process, then I grab Rikku’s bag and leave my cabin while thinking of ways to return it to its owner.

[][]

[][]

Once out of my room I wander over to where I vaguely remember Rikku’s room to be located. I poke my head in to find Yuna and Lulu sitting in a medium sized room with three beds. They both greet me, and I ask if they’ve happened to see Rikku lately.

Lulu smirks and replies to my question saying, “Hmmm…. I see.”

Her eyes are looking at my right hand which is currently holding Rikku’s little black holster bag. I feel my cheeks grow red as I mumble something like, “Oh uh… yeah I just wanted to return this… to her…”

Lulu continues to smirk as she stands up and makes her way to the door. “We… haven’t seen her since last night. Now, I’m going to go find Wakka and tell him where you are.”

“…tell Wakka?”

“He was asking if we’d seen _you_. Since you weren’t in your room last night.”

“I wasn’t in my room last night…?”

“Sir Auron didn’t seem to care, but you know Wakka…” she says, her final words before leaving the cabin.

Wasn’t in my room last night? What was she talking about? I look around at the room before me and realize there are probably more like it in the airship. There is probably a similar multi bed room for the male guardians… but I had been assigned to an individual cabin. I remember because Rikku told me specifically where it was once we left the Bridge and… oh.

So! The little thief had put me in cabin where she knew we would have some privacy. I’m fairly impressed at what Rikku seems able to do when she sets her mind on something. I mean, the girl gets what she wants.

At this moment I probably would have turned and followed Lulu, but I couldn’t help but notice how somber Yuna looked, sitting there by the window peering into the open sky.

“Uh… hey Yuna! Everything alright?”

The summoner looks up and gives me a weak smile.

“Hey… what’s the matter?”

Yuna looks back down at her own hands. “Oh, it’s nothing. I just… I feel as though I am no good at all…”

“What are you talking about?” I say in response.

“All this time, I've been thinking about how to defeat Sin. But I..." She shakes her head. "Beyond the teachings of Yevon, I...I know nothing. I'm sorry."

“Hey, don’t apologize! I don’t think there is any other summoner in Spira who could have done what you did. And in the face of Yevon calling us traitors you kept going, you know? You never quit… and I admire you for that.”

This seems to encourage Yuna, who responds with a thank you.

“Don’t worry Yuna,” I continue. “I’m trying to put together some good ideas myself right now, and it’s not so easy.”

There is a comfortable silence after I say these words, but then Yuna interjects with an idea. “You know, Kimahri said something yesterday that I thought was really interesting…”

“You mean Kimahri said more than a single sentence of words?”

Yuna smiles. “I think… he talks with me a little bit more. Barely.”

“So what did he say?”

"Well I told him that Yevon’s teachings won’t help us fight Sin… but then Kimahri said ‘No answer in the teachings, answers lie outside. Must know both sides to find answer.’ He mentioned that Maester Mika knows a lot. If we can get to him in Bevelle, maybe we can find out more…"

Maester Mika! The ronso is spot on. My mind starts churning, remembering what Lady Yunalesca had said about some “Yu Yevon”. The idiots in Bevelle were great at ignoring everything outside of Yevon but they were experts when it came to Yevon lore. If we could get to Mika, maybe we can get some more useful information about Sin.

“Yuna! That’s it! We’ve gotta bring this to the rest of the guardians. And then to Cid!” I say, enthusiastically.

Yuna looks sheepish, then pleased. “Really? I…I’m glad. Although the credit goes to Kimahri, not me.”

“Hey, listen I gotta get going but… Yuna?”

Yuna looks up at me.

“We’re going to defeat Sin, you know. And it’s going to be because you never quit, no matter what happened on the pilgrimage. So… that means all the credit goes to you, okay?”

Yuna lowers her head and I turn to leave the room. On my way out the door from behind me comes a soft, “Thank you.”

[][]

[][]

I make it maybe 5 steps out of the female guardians’ room before I’m ambushed by Brother. I don’t even get a word in edgewise as he grabs me by the arm and we start marching to an undetermined section of the airship.

“Hey, Brother! Wha…what’s going on?”

I hear nothing in reply until we reach some kind of mechanical work room tucked out of the way at the end of a long hall passage.

“Uh… shouldn’t you be flying the airship?”

Brother ignores my inquiry and instead stares at me intensely. At the end of this period of scrutiny he appears to have made his mind up about something.

“Okay,” he says, standing up straight. He tilts his head back slightly and makes an announcement: “I have decided… that you can marry Rikku!”

His words are so unexpected I’m rendered practically speechless. My mouth hang opens and flaps up and down a few times, but all I can get out is “Wha… at?”

Brother ignores my impressive response and flies into a passionate retelling of an event earlier this morning. He speaks so excitedly that his words end up being a mixture of Al Bhed and Spiran but I’m able to ascertain the gist of things:

Earlier this morning Rikku and Cid were having conversation on the bridge, talking about me becoming an Al Bhed. There is a little ceremony involved, nothing too formal, and Cid wanted to get it out of the way sometime today or maybe the next day. Rikku kept disagreeing with him, telling Cid it should wait until after we defeat Sin. Apparently things got pretty heated. Cid wouldn’t budge and eventually Rikku huffed away, so Cid asked Brother to go find out, “what that was all about”.

I listen attentively to Brother’s recapping of today’s earlier events, but after he finishes I still don’t have a clue as to why Brother is so worked up, or where the idea of marriage came from. My mind starts racing and I start thinking of the events of last night. Had he seen Rikku come in to my cabin?

Brother looks at me triumphantly and says, “Vydran tuac hud caa fryd ec lmayn du sa.”

_Father does not see what is clear to me._

“Brother, I… Rikku is…last night it wasn’t like I meant to—“

Brother interjects, “So cecdan ehdahtc du synno oui!”

_My sister intends to marry you!_

Once again, “Wh-what?” is all I can say in response. Did Rikku say this to Brother? Last night she and I talked about a lot of things, but we certainly did not talk about _getting married_. I mean, a battle with Sin is impending, and then afterwards…

Brother continues on. He talks like an overexcited kid who has figured out a tough puzzle or has discovered something for the first time. “Frah oui palusa Al Bhed oui femm zueh y vysemo. Drec ec bynd uv uin dnytedeuh. Oui yna du palusa so pnudran, yht y pnudran du Rikku. Pid Rikku tuac hud fyhd drec, palyica cra tuac hud fyhd du pa ouin cecdan. Drec ec palyica cra ryc vaamehkc vun oui.”

_When you become Al Bhed you will join a family. This is part of our tradition. You are to become my brother, and a brother to Rikku. But Rikku does not want this, because she does not want to be your sister. This is because she has feelings for you._

Brother says all of this so matter-of-fact, the way a child will sometimes spell out their thought process.

When he is done he looks very proud of himself.

I can’t help but I let out a small sigh of relief. I’m happy to know that he is _not_ in fact referring to the events of last night, which would certainly not be my topic of choice for a conversation with Brother.

I decide the best thing is to set the record straight. I will tell Brother that I care for Rikku, but marriage is not on either of our minds. I choose to say it in Al Bhed, so that there is no chance he misses this:

“Brother, E lyna cu silr vun Rikku. Dra dnidr ec E muja ran. Pid dra drehk ec…”

_Brother, I care so much for Rikku. The truth is I love her. But the thing is_ _…_

I don’t get to finish my schpiel before Brother cuts me off with a number of large exaggerated body movements. He only seems to have heard the first part of what I was trying to say because he shouts in Spiran, “This is good news! I will tell Vydran he must change the ceremony. To wedding!”

“What!?”

“Drec ec y silr aycean fyo du palusa Al Bhed. Frah huh Ym Prat synno Al Bhed, drao lyh palusa Al Bhed ev drao lruuca. Dra dnytedeuh uv palusehk Al Bhed drec fyo ec silr aycean.”

_This is a much easier way to become Al Bhed. When non Al Bhed marry Al Bhed, they can become Al Bhed if they choose. The tradition of becoming Al Bhed this way is much easier._

I start stumbling over my words again. “But wait… Brother…I… it’s not that I don’t want… it’s just… but what about Sin? We have to fight Sin!”

Brother does not appear to be listening. He continues, this time in broken Spiran, “I will go tell Vydran. Maybe he will not be… how do you say? Maybe he will not be furious.”

Furious!?

Brother starts making for the door of the mechanical room but I say, “Brother, wait! It’s not that I wouldn’t want to marry Rikku, but it’s just that—“

Brother turns at my words but even now I don’t have his full attention. I see his eyes go from my face to my hand. Or rather, what’s in my hand: Rikku’s holster bag.

A wave of recognition comes over Brother’s face. Pointing, he says “Frana tet oui kad drec?”

_Where did you get this?_


	28. Bad Liar

Cid was furious.

“You are telling me that Sin is floating in the clouds above Bevelle and we still don’t have a damn plan?!?” he was yelling, mostly at the Al Bhed crew, but Yuna’s guardians were not quite out of the line of fire either.

When Cid saw Brother and I come into the bridge his irritation rose higher, if that was even possible. He glared at Brother saying, “Ah, so my pilot finally decides to come back and do his job! Where the hell ya been? You begged me to pilot our ship and then run off, what in the hell were you up to exactly?”

Brother quickly scrambles to the cockpit and our earlier conversation becomes a thing of the past. I’m left standing with the rest of the guardians, including Rikku.

Cid then shakes his head and repeats his previous observation. “We have our pilot back, but still no stinkin’ plan.”

Wakka chooses to speak up at this point, saying “Hey guys, I just had a great idea!”

Rikku interjects, “It was my idea, let me tell them!”

They go back and forth for a moment until Lulu trumps them both. In a calm, unexcited voice she says, “The Hymn is the key.”

“The hymn?” I ask, scratching my head.

From here our plan beings to take form. We already knew that my old man likes the Hymn of the Fayth, back from when we were in Macalania and we observed Sin listening to it calmly. We all come to agree that if Sin hears the Hymn of the Fayth he will become docile and we’d have a better chance of successfully attacking him.

It takes some work between all of us but we then are eventually able to combine the above plan with Kimahri’s earlier suggestion to Yuna that we find Maester Mika and get some answers. It looks like Yuna and her guardians are heading to Bevelle.

Cid seemed appeased by our plan and quickly turned his attentions back to barking orders at his own Al Bhed crew. Meanwhile, the rest of us headed back to our rooms to get ready for the upcoming encounters.

[][]

[][]

There wasn’t much time before we departed to Bevelle, so we all started preparing quickly. Once outside the bridge I quickly and quietly returned Rikku’s holster bag. We couldn’t say much being within earshot of the rest of the guardians, but Rikku winked at me and gave me a knowing look.

“Hope this didn’t get you in to too much trouble,” she said, smiling. “I saw you and Brother came in at the same time, what were you talking about?”

I smiled nervously, thinking of how I had weaseled out of Brother’s questions about the holster bag using some quick talk and misdirection. It was weird thinking back to the previous hours of rest and frivolity in light of the battle plan atmosphere of the bridge. Was I really just moments ago having a conversation about _marriage_ with Brother?

Rikku peered at me, still looking for a response. I laughed my nervous little laugh and could only come up with the excuse all guys use at one point or another: “Oh, nothing really… just guy stuff.”

Rikku rolled her eyes. “Oui'na cilr y pyt meyn, oui ghuf?” she says knowingly, but she doesn’t press any further.

_You_ _’re such a bad liar_ , _you know?_

[][]

[][]

Bevelle was in disarray.  We almost got in a scuffle with some Bevelle guards until we were stopped by Shelinda the Yevon acolyte. Well, actually now she is Shelinda the captain of the guard. Yes, that’s right, the _captain_ of the Bevelle guard position has been transferred to a young woman who I’m not so sure has ever been in a fight.

Auron had smirked at the news. “Short on believers?” he had asked.

Shelinda informed us of the chaos in the temples, infighting between priests, and all around calamity in Bevelle. It all makes sense; I’m not sure what else I might have expected people do after seeing Sin floating above the city.

We tell Shelinda we’re here to see Maester Mika and she escorts us to the same courtroom where not too long ago Seymour and a bunch of other dead but still hanging around Maesters had pronounced judgment on Yuna and us guardians. Of course, this time the atmosphere was a little bit different.

You should have seen Mika’s face when Yuna told him of our defeat of Yunalesca. His posture towards us when we came in was one of irritation but acceptance that he was dependent on Yuna to defeat Sin. Now, however, he turned into full blown panic.

“You’ve taken away the only means of calming Sin!” he moaned. “Spira has lost its only hope. Destruction is inevitable. Yu Yevon’s spiral of death will consume us all.”

He had our full attention at the mention of “Yu Yevon.”

“Hey, who is this Yu Yevon guy?” I ask.

Rikku jumps in as well, “Wait, gramps! Who’s Yu Yevon?”

Mika answers us in his worried yet still patronizing tone. He explains, “Yu Yevon is he who crafts the souls of the dead into unholy armor. An armor called Sin. Clad it in it, Yu Yevon is invincible… and the only thing that could have pierced that armor, you have destroyed!”

There was no follow up to this pronunciation as Mika quickly vanished into a cloud of pyreflies, leaving us with one last gripe. “Nothing can stop it now.”

Wakka shakes his fist. “Disappear on us, will ya? Rotten son of a shoopuf!”

There is a moment’s silence after Mika fades away and I can feel us all collectively lose a little bit of steam. We came all this way just to be met by a babbling old man’s vague statements. I’m not so sure I have come to understand anything about this Yu Yevon guy through Mika.

When Shelinda comes to check on us Auron manages to stall, saying “The maester is not here yet. How long must we wait?” Naturally Shelinda gets very confused and goes off to “find” Maester Mika.

It’s after Shelinda leaves that I suddenly can see the fayth, the little boy who came to me when I passed out at the wall of fayth on Mt. Gagazet.

Interestingly enough, Yuna can see him as well.

“Come to my room” he says.

Yuna turns to the rest of us. “I must go see the fayth,” she explains.

[][]

[][]

The chamber of the fayth in Bevelle is very large and cold, with an ancient feel. I don’t quite like it, but I didn’t have to dwell on that fact for very long.

Well, lucky for us it seems the fayth is able to give us the answers that Maester Mika could not. When we tell him we plan to ‘defeat Yu Yevon’ he confirms that we must defeat him in order to bring an end to Sin. It turns out Yu Yevon was a summoner who lived long ago, and now the only thing he can do is summon Sin over and over again. When you defeat Sin with the Final Summoning, Yu Yevon just joins with the Final Aeon and transforms into Sin once again. So what all of this means is that true defeat of Sin requires us to defeat Yu Yevon…completely.

After his long diatribe explaining all of this the fayth turned and addressed Yuna. “Yuna, listen. When you fight Yu Yevon, we will help you. Promise me you’ll summon us. I’m afraid your swords and magic won’t be enough. Please, call us. Promise?”

“Yes, I will,” Yuna replied.

Then the fayth turned his attention to me. “But, you know… when it is all over… we will wake, and your dream will end. Our dream will vanish.”

I swallow, my throat suddenly becoming dry. “Yeah,” I say quietly. “You’ve been dreaming a long time, haven’t you?”

“I’m sorry.”

I lower my head. “I’m grateful.”

With that the fayth vanishes, and it’s just me and Yuna again in the cold echoing chamber.

Yuna faces me. “Grateful… about what?”

“Oh nothing,” I say.

“You’re hiding something.” Yuna observes.

I let out a large sigh. Early this morning I was waking up after a night with Rikku, more relaxed and simply happy than I had been since I could remember. My thoughts were consume with her and about finally becoming an Al Bhed. After this I was busy fending off a crazy conversation with Brother about marriage, of all the things. It was like for a brief moment there was no Sin, there was no Fayth, there wasn’t anything but me and a girl floating up in the air.

Coming to Bevelle was like crashing back down to the ground, full force back to reality. The reality of Sin and Yevon and Summoners and Fayth…

I look at Yuna, who is still patiently observing me. For a moment I see how pretty she is and think about how her calm and persevering spirit has this funny way of complimenting my loud, rash self. In another world I wonder if we would have been more than friends.

No doubt, Yuna has proven to be a good friend throughout this whole journey. She allowed me to become her guardian without even knowing me, then she treated me like any one of her other protectors. She managed to always think highly of my old man too, despite my own harsher opinion.

I sense in this moment that Yuna can understand a bit of what I am feeling. Not too long ago the world was on her shoulders, and she was ready to make the ultimate sacrifice to bring Spira only a temporary reprieve from Sin.

It’s not the same, but I feel a burden on my own shoulders right now.

Yuna also made a lot of lonely decisions along the way, like when she decided to marry Seymour just to get the chance to send him. And lately I’ve known what it’s like to make lonely decisions.

As I ruminate on these things there is a bond I can sense between myself and Yuna. This intense moment of connection I feel with the summoner pulls all the stress from where I’ve buried it deep within to the surface and I decide I can’t _not_ tell her. I decide to tell Yuna the truth.

[][]

[][]

Yuna takes it all in. We are both sitting now, a few feet from where Yuna was kneeling just moments ago.

“So that’s what the fayth meant, when he said the ‘dream will vanish’.”

I nod. “I’m not sure entirely what it means, but I know that after I defeat my old man, and then I guess Yu Yevon… my story is… over.”

Yuna frowns. “Do you think so? I once thought my story would end in Zanarkand…but here I am. Does yours have to end?”

I give a slight smile. “Maybe my story ends so that yours can continue.”

Yuna shakes her head and I can see some tears forming in her eyes. I begin second guessing my decision to tell her. I didn’t want to upset her like this. I hadn’t expected Yuna’s response to my sharing to be so… personal.

“We’ll find a way, Tidus,” she says after a moment. “I can’t let… we can’t let your story end.”

I put my hand on Yuna’s shoulder. “It’s okay…I’ve come to terms with it I think. I’m just focused on getting the job done right now.”

Yuna puts her hand on mind and closes her eyes. I’m reminded again of my thoughts earlier. If a certain blonde thief hadn’t already stolen my heart, I wonder if Yuna and I…

We stay like this for a moment and then Yuna opens her eyes. I can see a shift in her thinking as she lets go of my hand and looks back up at me. “You haven’t told Rikku,” she says. This is an observation, not a question.

I lower my head. After I shared with Yuna we began talking about me being some sort of dream of the Fayth, and about what will happen after Sin. Our conversation was somber but it didn’t hurt to talk about. Not like the way it hurts when I think about Rikku.

Yuna makes another observation, and I wish she would stop because her words have become like daggers. “You love Rikku.”

I nod, unable to say anything else.

“She doesn’t know… that after our battle with Sin…”

I stand up now, abruptly. I haven’t let myself think about it and I’m not going to start thinking about it now.  I motion towards the exit of the Chamber of the Fayth. “Hey, uh, I think we should get going, yeah? I bet the others are getting worried.”

Yuna stands up as well, her eyes still glued on my face. “Tidus,” she asks, “are you alright?”

I put on the best smile I can muster in this moment and say, “I’m fine!” with a wave of my hand. I start making my way to the exit.

From behind me I hear Yuna.

 “You’re such a bad liar, you know?”


	29. Undeniable Truth

It had been a long journey to get here. A long journey spanning across an entire world filled with different kinds of people and places, a journey filled with beauty and with pain and a whole lot in between. But I can tell you that there was one thing that was constant throughout the pilgrimage, one sad truth that was always true no matter which part of Spira I found myself in. It was inescapable.

The Al Bhed are despised, treated like sub-humans by all of Spira.

No matter where we went there was no escaping this truth. Even back at Home, the one place you felt you could get away and forget it even just for a moment, even then the truth showed up. Truth had travelled through the desert, delayed for a time by the endless sands, but always continuing on, until finally it reached its destination. The Guado attack on Home destroyed the one place in Spira where you could have green spiraled eyes and not be hated.

All of this is why, after we had stood poised to fight on top of the airship flying parallel to Sin, after we destroyed both of Sin’s fins, after we watched as Spira’s tormentor fell down through the sky and crash land in Bevelle, and after the reality of what this all meant became clear: I let out a yell from the depths of my soul, a shout that put all my past blitzball celebrations to shame. I was joined by Brother, by Cid, and by what felt like every single one of the other Al Bhed riding on the airship, most of them with their faces pressed up against any available window.

You see, it’s true that Spira despises the Al Bhed.

But here in this post victory moment was a new truth, a greater truth. The Al Bhed love Spira. This was why in the wreckage of their destroyed home they boarded a piece of machina, one that took decades of work to locate, salvage, and repair. They could have flown anywhere, maybe to a new place in the desert, or an out of the way island to establish a new Home. But no, once they got on that airship machina, what did they do? They went to the sky and took the battle to Sin.

[][]

[][]

Of course, we weren’t done. Not yet.

There was a celebration on the Highbridge with Brother racing to me and Rikku as soon as we entered.

“Kevd! Rikku! Aqlammahd!" he exclaims.

_Excellent!_

Once celebrations die down we all turn to stare out the airship windows where Sin lies, looking defeated on the outskirts of Bevelle.

"It's going to come back, isn't it?" Yuna is the first to speak.

I nod my head. “I know."

Cid is less understanding. "What? You're kidding me!"

I look over to him. Maybe it’s because I’m riding the high of our victory but I find myself a lot less nervous around Rikku’s father at the moment. "No, not kidding.” I say. “We have to beat the guy inside Sin.”

Wakka gave a nervous laugh. "The Crusaders would be out of a job if it was this easy."

"But it has weakened. I'm sure of it." Lulu responds.

Cid gives a loud “harrumph” but then turns back into battle commander mode, almost instantly. I’m sure whatever it took for him to rise to the ranks of leader of the Al Bhed was coming to his aid now. He started barking orders to the Al Bhed crew and gave me a cursory nod. “All right. I’ll do what I can with the main gun!”

[][]

[][]

We have a few moments to gather ourselves and prepare. There isn’t much time left now. I can feel it. I can feel my old man, I can feel the upcoming confrontation.

I’m not the only one who can feel it.

Rikku follows me out of the Highbridge, back to my little room in the airship. I think back briefly to the night we spent together here. I had some good memories in this room. So did Rikku, I suppose, although she probably didn’t realize that one those memories was me, in the flesh. A living memory courtesy of the Fayth.

We make our way aimlessly to the bed, sit down side by side, and after a moment she is the first to speak.

“You’re not telling me something,” she says, a mere whisper.

My heart breaks and I think about telling her everything, same as I had with Yuna in the chamber of fayth in Bevelle. But there is a stronger force, telling me to hold back. Maybe it’s the force inside of me that knows if I say anything I will start crying. My old man’s voice echoes loudly in my mind, like it always seems to in these moments.

_What, are you going to cry? Go on, go ahead you little crybaby._

“Rikku…” I begin.

“It’s okay,” she says. “You don’t have to.”

“Really?”

She smiles. I love that smile. “You are bad at secrets, remember? I’ll find out eventually.”

“I love you.” I say, and then I keep going because if I stop I will start to cry. “I want you to know that I love you, and that… that… what I _want_ is to spend the rest of my life with you okay?”

Rikku’s eyes widen but she holds my gaze.

I can’t stop talking. “I mean, when my old man disappeared… my mom… she died of a broken heart you know? She just kind of stopped living. And I hated my old man for disappearing on us, for leaving her …but I sort of hated her too, you know? She left me alone and I didn’t understand. Why couldn’t she have gotten over it?”

I take Rikku’s hand that is closest to mine. “But I get it now. I get how much she must have hurt, I get it now.”

I’m proud of myself. I managed to say it all without crying.

We kiss. It’s simple and sweet, and I don’t remember who initiates it. But even now I know. I know with this sunken feeling in my stomach, that there is another great, undeniable truth. The truth is that I won’t be coming back from this Sin encounter.

Oh, I could be selfish. I could cling to Rikku and stay with the Al Bhed and enjoy the Calm. I could marry this girl and maybe have a kid even, teach him Blitzball, and I wouldn’t be a dick about it like my old man. The Fayth would keep on dreaming and I would still be here. But then Sin would come back, and destroy everything, and then some other summoner will have to go and die… and how could I live knowing we had the chance to put an end to it?

The Al Bhed are not selfish. The Al Bhed keep sacrificing everything for Spira, it’s what they do. And I didn’t start out this way but now, more than anything else, I am Al Bhed.

“I get it now.” I keep saying. Over and over again, whispering in between kisses. “I get it now.”

Rikku brushes the tears from my eyes but doesn’t stop kissing me.


	30. Silent Exchange

“Maester Seymour!?!!?”

These weren’t my words. No, they belonged to Wakka. You see, _I_ wasn’t surprised to see Seymour in the middle of Sin, moments after we disembarked from our airship ride into the belly of the beast. After all, why wouldn’t Seymour be here? Makes perfect, logical sense really. We’ve only defeated him _three_ times.

This time though, even he had to admit his own final defeat. We all witnessed Yuna send him as he gave some paltry excuse for a final speech. And then… he was gone.

You’d think the finality of it would make me happy, I mean we _finally_ defeated Seymour. Instead it just reminded me that this is the end. Seymour’s not coming back. I’m not coming back.

[][]

[][]

There he is.

There is nothing that makes my hair stand on end like my old man’s voice.

“You’re late, Auron.”

That stupid voice. That gravely, rough voice that was a thing of nightmares throughout my childhood. I can’t remember anything nice ever said to me in that voice. I hate it.

Auron grunts in response. “I know.”

My old man turns to look at me. “Hey.”

During the months of travelling throughout Spira I had anticipated this encounter. I had speeches lined up, some of them cool and witty while others were filled with anger and spite. I had a speech prepared for every emotion, or so I thought.

Instead I only manage to say, “Hi.”

“Hah!”

I hate his laugh.

“You got tall, but you’re all bones! You eating right, boy?”

I don’t know what to say so I don’t say anything. In the corner of my eye I see Rikku looking at me. I feel a kind of force emanating from her. It fills me with a sort of… strength.

Jecht continues. “You’re really grown.”

“Yeah. But you’re still bigger.”

“Well, I am Sin, you know.”

I shake my head. “That’s not funny.”

My old man laughs. “Well, then… I mean… you know. Let’s end this.”

I look over at Rikku, just a glance. We have an exchange that I can’t put words to. Nothing happens really, I’m not really thinking any thoughts and I wouldn’t have any idea what kind of thoughts are in her mind. She simply nods, a slight tilt of her head and then whatever it is that passes between us, the energy or force or _love_ that gets exchanged puts a new speech in my mouth.

“Dad?” I say, looking back at my old man. His eyes glance over to where I was looking at Rikku and then back to me again.

“Yeah?”

“I’m going to do something you never did, and you never could do.”

He doesn’t have any response to this. No laugh, no grin, he just continues to look at me. I’ve never not had my old man belittle me in some way when I speak. So I continue.

“I’m going to defeat Sin. Once and for all. Not even you could do that.”

Now he is smiling, but it’s not a cocky grin. It looks like… pride?

“And Dad?”

“Yeah?”

“I hate you.”

Jecht stands tall. “I know, I know. You know what you have to do.”

“Yeah.”

In a strained voice my old man explains that he can’t hear the Hymn of the Fayth so much anymore. Pretty soon he’ll be completely Sin and he won’t be able to hold himself back. I fight back my tears. I’ve said my piece and he has said his, it’s time to finish this.

[][]

[][]

We fought harder than ever before. All of us, the summoner and her guardians. We pulled no punches, and we like worked like one unit, a single entity blowing hit after hit until Jecht… no, I mean, until Sin could take no more.

We won.

And when it was over and the Final Aeon exploded into a massive ball of light and energy, I was surprised to see my old man still standing there. Barely. One last time.

I ran to him and before I knew it I was hugging him. I could feel his strength rapidly leaving his body, then he sunk to the ground after we break our hug. Now lying on the floor he pulls out his trademark Jecht grin and being the piece of shit that he is, he says,

“You’ll cry. You’re gonna cry. You always cry, see? You’re crying.”

I’m crying.

“I hate you, Dad.”

He gives a pained laugh. Then his face sobers, for a moment.

“What you said earlier, you were right. I didn’t think you had it in you, boy. Where’d that strength come from?”

Before I respond he glances over to Rikku, who is several paces behind us along with the rest of the guardians.

“Ah. Heh. Never mind. My son is a man, I see that now.” He grumbles his next words but I can make them out, just barely. “Love will do that to you.”

Yuna softly approaches us from behind. “Sir Jecht… I should…” she motions with her staff.

“No, Yuna!” He grunts. “There’s no time!”

We all brace ourselves as Yu Yevon approaches.

[][]

[][]

“Everyone!” I yell.

We had just finished slicing through Yuna’s aeons that had been possessed by Yu Yevon. Finally we were facing off against Yu Yevon himself. This was it. I had to say goodbye.

Yuna and the rest of the guardians turn to look at me.

“This the last time we fight together, okay?”

“Huh?” says Wakka.

I turn to face Rikku. “What I’m trying to say is… after we beat Yu Yevon… I’ll disappear.”

“What are you talking about?” shouts Lulu.

I realize now, how unfair this is. Waiting until the last moment to say this to my companions. But it’s too late now.

I take out my sword, ready to fight.

“I’m saying goodbye!”

“No!” cries Rikku. “Not now!”

I can’t look at her. I can’t and I won’t, but my voice is all apology.

“I know it’s selfish, but this is my story!”

Yu Yevon’s final form descends on us before anyone has a chance to say another word.

[][]

[][]

All of Spira shakes.

Yuna spins and spins, turning round and round with grace like the accomplished summoner that she is.

Auron begins to disappear, and Yuna stops for a moment, until he tells her not to and she begins again.

“This is your world now,” he says to me. Those are his final words as he disappears.

My heart catches in my throat briefly with a thought. _I lost two fathers today_.

[][]

[][]

Yuna continues spinning, on and on she goes. Spira continues to rumble, gently shaking as if it is dancing along with Yuna.

We are somehow back on the airship although I couldn’t tell you how. We watch as the sending begins to affect all of the Aeons floating around us. One by one they too disappear into clouds of pyreflies. When Sin finally bursts the explosion lights up our faces with a yellow glow. It’s beautiful, really.

Then I notice that my hands are starting to fade. My heart races as I turn them over; they are not quite see through but I can’t feel my fingers any more. I don’t have much time left. I never had enough time.

I approach Rikku who is shaking her head, tears in her eyes.

“No,” she says, simply.

“Rikku, I’m sorry.”  A sense of peace passes over me. Whatever is happening to me feels weird, but it’s a warm feeling, non-threatening. My heart still races though, looking at her.

“You can’t…” she begins. “I can’t…”

I approach her and kiss her. Through this kiss I try and say everything that I’ve never been good at putting into words:

_I love you. None of his would have been possible without you. You made me in to better person, you made me into a man. You are my light. You_ _’re positivity kept me afloat, I would have drowned if it wasn_ _’t for you. I will miss your eyes the most. No, your smile. No, your laugh. We would have gotten married, and I would have spent the never-ending Calm holding you. I would have spent my entire life repaying everything you have given me. Don_ _’t forget me. Wherever I am going I will not forget you. It would be impossible to forget you. I love you._

I continue to fade until I cannot feel her face on mine any longer. I take a step forward to regain the feeling of closeness and then I pass right through her, completely. The others gasp audibly. I turn around and she is still facing where I was just moments before.

“E muja oui.” She says these words to the air that has taken my place.

  _I love you._

I walk back towards her and wrap my arms around her, although she doesn’t know I am there. I can’t feel her in my arms, but I can _feel_ her. The thought encourages me. I will always be able to feel Rikku.

With one motion I pass through her. Without looking back I run as fast as I can to the edge of the airship and jump into the clouds. As I float down I see High Summoner Braska, then Auron, and then Jecht. My old man sticks out his hand and we exchange a high-five as I descend.

I continue past them but it doesn’t feel like I’m falling so much as floating through the air.

[][]

[][]

The clouds part and I can see Spira below me. My eyes spot Bikanel easily, sticking out as it does with its bright yellow sands in a world filled with green and blue. I focus in on where the water hits the shores of the island.

Rikku is like the desert sand, I think. Bright as the sun but with a quiet, immovable strength. She told me once I am like the sea and its waves. I smile to myself.

I continue to watch from above in these final moments before I completely fade away. I see the ocean dancing with the shores of the desert island. It’s a silent exchange, no words but an exchange all the same. The waves crash and pull the sand with it. But the sand is strong too. It remains in place as the island is encircled by the water, the ocean holding the desert within its arms.

[][]

[][]

_I think I figured it out, we need to be together_

_Like the shore and the sea_

_We are not one thing, we_ _’re joined here together_

_My ocean and me_

  * Jon Foreman, “In My Arms”



 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE END. No, of course not. There will be an epilogue. And before I get a bunch of reviews and messages telling me I just ended things the same as the game did and what was the point???, believe me when I say the epilogue will mix things up.


	31. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We have come to the end. This Epilogue is dedicated to every one of you that reviewed, or direct messaged me to keep going with this story until the very end. If you have a chance, I would love to hear from your readers in the form of a comment with your thoughts on this story as a whole. It has been a long journey, thank you for coming along for the ride!

My own words seem to haunt me. It’s been over a year now and there is nothing I can do to shake them.

_Memories are nice, but that_ _’s all they are. I keep mine inside_.

I had said that to you once, outside of the Farplane in Guadosalam. They’re not really _my_ words, I suppose, they belong to all of us Al Bhed. It’s a common saying, a reminder to ourselves that we only get one chance at this life. There used to be no sending for us, no place for our pyreflies to go.

Like most of my friends and family these words became real to me after I experienced loss. My mother, my aunt, countless friends… in all of those times these words helped me.

But they can’t seem to help me now.

[][]

[][]

Brother keeps begging me to join him in the skies, permanently. He worked hard to salvage his own airship, then began assembling his own team of sphere hunters. It would be fun, there is no denying it, to hop around Spira in pursuit of treasures. Could we Al Bhed have ever imagined the day when we could openly scour this world for ancient machina unhindered? And with Yevonites joining in no less? It’s the Eternal Calm, and it’s a new day for the Al Bhed.

But I can’t help turning Brother down. I can’t explain it really so I don’t try to with him. It’s just that… I need to stay close to the water. It’s silly right? Flying through the air is so adventurous and exciting, everything that I could have ever dreamed of when I was younger. I should be jumping at every chance to ride Brother’s airship, _The Celsius_.

Instead I am on a salvage ship. Not _unexciting_ , you know? I mean I’m still getting my machina fix right here, doing the same kinds of digs I’ve done my whole life. This time we don’t even have to do them in the cover of darkness to hide our movements from Yevon.

I try not to but I can’t help but be happier when I am getting ready for these trips. Brother will ask me where I’m off to like he always does, and I’ll try and answer all casual: “ _Oh, the usual route. South of Bikanel, stick west of Besaid and Kilika, then circle back._ "

I’m normally not so transparent. I mean, regardless of what is going on inside I can always maintain my trademark grin. I’m really good at staying optimistic no matter what is going on around me and I can compartmentalize my feelings like nobody’s business. This has always helped me keep my focus on the present and the positive.

But Brother has known me my whole life and so he sees right through me. “Rikku…” he’d say. “Oui fuh'd veht res drana…”

_You won_ _’t find him there_ _…_

And he’s right you know? I know that I won’t find you. Brother knows the trip itinerary means we’ll be going by Baaj Temple, right by where we found the first airship and… you.

What Brother doesn’t know is that I just can’t leave the water. Not yet, now when I can _feel_ you sometimes. I can feel you when it’s nighttime, and I’m on the deck of the salvage ship, and I remember when we first met and what it was like plucking you out of those ancient ruins, and I remember that night was the first time you made me laugh, and my stomach had started doing those flips while you talked about Zanarkand…

… and then, right on cue, my own words will echo softly.

_Memories are nice, but that_ _’s all they are._

[][]

[][]

So I have a plan. I think it will finally put an end to this, maybe let me escape the repeating whispers in my own mind.

It was Yunie’s idea, actually. One of the benefits of the salvage digs is that I get to visit her in Besaid. She’s there now, along with Lulu and Wakka.

She loved you too, did you know? She confessed it to me a few months after Sin’s defeat. It was after a big celebration in Besaid that took up almost the entire day, a welcome home feast and bonfire for Yuna. We had huddled together as the bonfire flames eventually died down and slowly the other residents of the island began to surrender to their yawns and the sleep in their eyes.

She had admitted it with tears in her eyes. She had been afraid I would be upset, but I had comforted her, which you think might have been hard but actually it was easy. It was easy because I was jealous of her. She could open up and share about her feelings for you, just like everyone else.

All of Spira celebrated their High Summoner Yuna but the Al Bhed, we know who really took down Sin. You were our _kevd,_ our gift. Everyone would swap stories of their interactions with you, things like “He threw a blitzball over to me once!” and “At Operation Mi’ihen, we worked on calibrating the cannons together!” They’d talk with awe about your courage and your kindness. About how you saved Brother’s life that one time, and about how even Pops shed a tear when he learned of your fate.

It was so easy for everyone to talk about you like you were no longer here.

Then, when they were done talking about how much _they_ loved you, and when they thought I couldn’t overhear them, they would talk about us.

“Dra fyo ra fuimt muug yd ran...lyldic vmufan muja” they would say.

_The way he would look at her_ _…_ c _actus flower love_.

Maybe you remember hearing this phrase back when we were at Home? The cactus flower is life that springs up in the harshest of climates. It endures the desert heat and is beautiful to all who behold it. It’s something delicate amidst the sharp cactus thorns and a desolate environment. The Al Bhed say this to describe only the deepest kind of love.

It’s so easy for them to talk like this about you, and about us, but I just can’t do the same. How could I explain how much you meant to me, how much _I_ loved _you_ , without using the past tense? How do I explain to anyone that putting you in the past meant giving in to my own words?

_Memories are nice, but that_ _’s all they are_.

My own thoughts were tormenting me and I was going crazy keeping so much inside that finally, on my most recent visit, I shared some of my frustration with Yunie. I just let it all out, talking about how I couldn’t give you up, not yet. You were still out there, I _felt_ it.

She looked at me for a long time without saying anything. When she finally spoke it was not anything I expected.

“Come with me to the Farplane.”

[][]

[][]

An Al Bhed actually going in to the Farplane was unheard of. We Al Bhed do not get sent by summoners, which means our pyreflies don’t go to any resting place. There is no one in the Farplane for us to see. Most of my life I was told the visions of loved ones you’d see were just tricks of the pyreflies, anyhow. Another blind Yevonite tradition. _Just memories_.

So I shocked myself, a little bit, when I said to her, “Okay. I’ll go with you.”

This is how desperate I am. I think maybe if I can see you, and see that you are just a trick of the pyreflies, then I can move on. But if I am honest there is also that part of me, buried deep within and behind several locked doors, that truly hopes I w _on_ _’t_ see you. Because maybe that would mean you are still out there somewhere.

Yunie had wanted to take the long way, revisiting all of the places in Spira she had passed through during her pilgrimage. After all, the first time she had gone through she had thought each visit to each location would be her last. But I knew if we took so long I would lose my nerve. So I begged her to have us go to Guadosalam right away and Yunie, being as sweet as she always is, could not deny me. I contacted Brother from the salvage ship commsphere and he agreed to pick us up in _The Celsius_.

A few days of travel and we arrived at our destination.

[][]

[][]

I was all nerves. I could tell Yuna was nervous too, although I didn’t have any idea why. I was glad I didn’t mention the specifics of our trip to Brother and the rest of his airship crew. I didn’t want an Al Bhed lecture on the Farplane, or worse yet, to have Brother insist to come with us.

All I want is to see you again, Tidus. I don’t even care if it’s just a trick of the pyreflies, a _memory._

We made our way up the steps slowly, and when we finally arrived I caught myself gasping. In all that I’ve been told about the Farplane, they never told us it was so… beautiful.

Pyreflies were flying around in mass upon meadows and meadows of ethereal flowers. There were waterfalls, but somehow no water? And there was a kind of echoing noise filling the area, the sound of pyreflies amplified by their mass quantity.

Yunie led me by the hand to the edge of the cliff area we were standing on. It was only Yunie and I in the area. The Guado watching the Farplane entrance had assured us _the High Summoner shall have her privacy_ , not that we had asked for it.

We waited a few minutes at the edge of this cliff and then some figures began to appear. They were almost transparent, but visible all the same. My mind was quick to identify them. _Sir_ _Auron and Lord Braska_. Auron looked… almost peaceful, which was an odd look for Yunie’s former guardian. I knew not to expect my mother or my aunt, Yunie’s mom. Given the nature of their deaths and their status as Al Bhed there was no sending when they passed.

We waited a few moments longer, but then… nothing. You didn’t come. I waited and you still didn’t come.

Emotions beyond the scope of what I could handle began to swirl in my chest, my breath caught and my body found itself stuck between wanting to fall to my knees or run out of there as fast as I could… until suddenly… a little boy appeared.

I’d never seen this boy before but he appeared right before Yunie. And then, he spoke.

“Lady Yuna.”

“Hello.”

I was gaping now, looking between Yunie and the little boy. I had heard lots of stories about the Farplane but never anything about the pyreflies _talking_ back at you.

Yunie, however, didn’t seem at all shaken up by this turn of events.

The little boy continued, “We are at peace, now. We thank you, Lady Yuna.”

Yunie nodded, then opened her mouth like she was about to so say something, but the little boy continued on.

“You would like an answer for your request.”

Yunie nodded once more.

“After Yu Yevon’s defeat we were very tired. We had been dreaming for so long. In the chamber of the fayth I was not able to make any promises to you. But now we have had such sweet rest. And we are grateful to you Lady Yuna...”

The little boy turns from Yunie and looks straight into my eyes. My breath is caught in my throat and I can only stare wide-eyed back at the apparition.

“… and to you as well Guardian Rikku.”

My mouth hangs open in response but I am spared from having to form words when the boy returns his attentions to Yunie.

“We can now answer your request. We cannot “save” him because there is nothing to save him from. But we can bring him back to this world.”

Yunie gasps and I see that she is struggling to stand. Tears form in her eyes and I can hear the effort in her words as she quietly says, “Thank you.”

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[][]

Back within the safety of Brother’s airship I was able to get answers to the millions of questions swimming through my mind.

Yunie told me that back when we were in Bevelle, right before our fight with Sin, you had revealed to her that you were some kind of dream of the Fayth. I felt jealously flood over me as she told me this. You had shared this with Yunie, but never told me?

When you disappeared, I thought it was because you were some kind of unsent. Like Auron or Seymour. I thought Yunie’s sending on the deck of the airship was what caused you to disappear. I could understand that, I could accept that reality. But then… more than a year has passed and I can still _feel_ you somehow. This whole time I had no way of deciphering how I was feeling. The persistence that I felt that you were not quite _gone_. But I never would have guessed this: You were not an unsent. You were a _dream_.

“Rikku…” she said, no doubt noticing the tears in my eyes. “He told me… because he could. I asked him about telling you, and you should have seen his face. He loved you so much…”

_…but he didn_ _’t love Yunie_ , _not in that way._ I finished Yunie’s unspoken line of thought in my own mind. This cooled my hot anger; I knew that Yunie was hurting too. You had burdened her with knowledge at the same time that you protected me out of love. This must have hurt Yunie, knowing all of this before our battle with Sin.

There was more, though.

“After I found out… I… well, that little boy at the Farplane? That was Bahamut, or rather, the Fayth that the aeon is made of. After Tidus left the chamber of the Fayth in Bevelle, I spoke to him once more.” Yunie’s eyes took on a distant look, as if in this moment her memories had transported back in time to the chamber. “I… begged them, Rikku. I asked them to somehow save Tidus. I didn’t quite understand what it all meant, him being a dream of the Fayth. But I asked them to save him.”

My eyes were wide at this point, my vision blurred by tears. Yunie’s story was deciphering the cryptic interaction I just witnessed in the Farplane. The little Fayth boy’s words were coming back to me with all new meaning attached.

_But we can bring him back to this world._

“Yunie,” I say, grabbing one of my cousin’s hands. “Does this mean…”

Yunie collected herself for a moment, her free hand brushing away the beginning of tears at the corners of her eyes. Then she looked back at me right into my own wide-eyed gaze. “I think… I think so Rikku.”

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What I had now was hope, and what a difference this made!

I didn’t know where to go or what to do after getting this information from Yunie. I thought about sharing my new knowledge, but what would I tell anyone? The majority of Al Bhed think the Farplane is one big illusion. Telling them about our interaction with the Fayth child would most likely be met with skepticism, or worse, pity on me for letting myself listen to the promises of a mirage.

Most Al Bhed, however, have never been a summoner’s guardian. They never saw an Aeon in action, and they never fully understood why the summoner’s visit all of the Yevonite temples and spend so long in the chambers of the Fayth. Unlike most Al Bhed, I have experienced it all. And I also had stood there in the Farplane while the Fayth told us they could bring you back.

Some time passed and Yunie returned to Besaid. We had no details, not idea of what the Fayth could or would do. The only thing I knew is that I could always feel you the most when I was near the water. The salvage digs could almost bring back your laughter, and the clear blue water in the light of the day reminded me of when I used to drown in your eyes.

So I went on a salvage dig.

This time I didn’t try and hide my excitement from Brother. I didn’t try to mask my plans, or my heart. I told him exactly where I was going.

_Baja Temple_.

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We were about 3 days in to our journey when a message came through on the commsphere.

“Rikku! Lusa pylg yd uhla! Drana yna nabundc uv... cdnyhka yldejedo yd Bikanel.”

_Come back at once! There are reports of... strange activity at Bikanel_.

When I asked Brother to elaborate I just got more obtuse, unclear information. With Home destroyed the main presence on Bikanel Island was the Al Bhed salvage hunters. New dig sites were popping up every month, and then of course there was the Al Bhed harbor where our salvage dig ships returned toting along machina treasures. Whatever strange activity was going on, apparently it was happening at the docks.

Usually I enjoyed the leisurely pace of a salvage dig journey. This time though I practically itched with envy of Brother and his fast travelling airship. He would no doubt make it to Bikanel days in advance of our ship.

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[][]

When finally, mercifully, the harbor came in to view of our salvage ship I couldn’t believe my eyes.

There were more Al Bhed salvage ships gathered in the harbor at a single time then I had ever seen in my entire life. There were plenty of non Al Bhed ships as well, and even some airships in addition to _The Celsius_. The Harbor was simply overflowing with activity.

Once we finally found a place to dock, which was not an easy task given the number of ships already in the marina, I could hear our ship captain calling out to the dockworkers.

“Fryd ryc rybbahat? Fryd ec kuehk uh?”

_What has happened? What is going on?_

He received excited shouts in response.

“Kevd! Kevd ryc nadinhat. Ra ec ymeja!”

_Kevd! Kevd has returned. He is alive!_

At the sound of the first “Kevd” I found myself running to the edge of the ship. I didn’t even wait for them to attach the boarding plank to the dock. Without any hesitation I hurdled over the side of the ship and jumped onto the dock, taking off into a sprint almost immediately.

There was a huge gathering in the modest harbor town square, next to the small cantina where exhausted ship crews would often pass their time on shore leave. I didn’t know what exactly was up ahead but I ran as fast as I could in the direction of the crowd.

As I drew closer some people began to recognize me and I could hear a loud murmur spread amongst all the people gathered here. Then, incredibly, the crowd began to part for me. I ran through the gap that was being slowly created for me, ecstatic that I wasn’t going to have to shove and push. The gap continued to widen until it cleared away enough that I could see and then… there you were.

It happened almost in slow motion.

You were standing with Brother and Jekud, laughing and looking grateful but embarrassed for all of the attention the Al Bhed crowd was showering you with. I saw you before you saw me, and maybe because my mind was racing I had the time to notice some things as I continued to run at a full sprint.

I noticed you were wearing the same clothes that you had worn the day you jumped off of the airship. I noticed your smile, which I felt like I had never forgotten and yet, I seemed to have forgotten the way it makes my stomach churn and my heart race.

I made it to the edge of the crowd and into the little clearing where you stand. The crowd begins to yell and cheer, recognizing what they are about to witness. I am usually very protective of my inner heart, and quite private when it comes to what this group of people are about to see. But in this moment, let them all watch. Let them all see.

You turn to see why the crowd cheers, then our eyes meet. Those incredible blue eyes.

I collide into you, not knowing what else to do. During my sprint I hadn’t thought at all about what I was going to do when I reached my final destination. My heart overflows and for some reason I am hitting you. My hands are in fists and I beat them on your chest.

_Where have you been, how could you have left me,_ my right fist says.

_Never leave me again_ , my left fist says.

You laugh and smile as I pound at you, and that makes me begin to laugh and smile as well. I jump on you, legs straddling you and you hold me in place easily; my petite size is no match for your strong arms.

_I love you_ , my lips say.

The crowd whoops and hollers; this is the cactus flower love that they have been talking about for over a year now. The crowd likes being right, they enjoy seeing their fairy tales and legends come alive. Suddenly I am no longer bothered by their storytelling. This story isn’t past tense any more, and I am happy to provide them with material for their next chapter.

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“Whoa, Rikku! Slow down!” you say, strong hands reaching for mine.

I laugh but I don’t have any intention of slowing down. I straddle your chest while my hands struggle against buckles and zippers and buttons, and I let out a little huff of frustration. In response to my struggle I can see your bright smile widen in the dim lighting of my little salvage ship cabin. Somehow this spurs me on to move faster.

I have managed to get your shirt off and now I can feel your chest with my hands. I can feel your heartbeat through my fingertips and this calms me somewhat. You are real, you are _really_ real. But I crave more, I need even more proof. Finally, after a single day that felt like an eternity, I have my chance.

You, Tidus, are way too generous and kind. I could swear you talked with every single person in that crowd today. Everyone wanted to shake Kevd’s hand, or have you sign their blitzball, or reminisce with you about that one time they met you back at Home, or on the airship. They wanted to talk to me too, and although patience is not a word often used to describe me, I certainly exhibited plenty of it when asked all those questions.

So now that we are finally alone, you want me to continue being patient? I laugh to myself. Not going to happen.

You suck in breath while I begin kissing your neck, my hands continuing to fumble in the dim light.

 “Rikku, listen…”

I pause for a moment, sit back and look into your eyes. “No, Tidus, you listen. I… have been…” I search for the words in my non-native tongue. My vocabulary is failing me so I continue on in Al Bhed, “E ryja paah jano bydeahd... E ryja fyedat ujan y oayn. E muja oui. Pid oui haat du cdub dymgehk, palyica E ymcu _haat_ oui”

_I have been very patient... I have waited over a year. I love you. But you need to stop talking, because I also_ need _you_.

I sense you struggling with something. You nods at my words, but then give a last ditch effort to delay what’s happening here just a little longer. You know you have to talk fast so the words come flying out of your mouth at a rapid speed.

“Ijustwantyoutoknow I’m not going anywhere, Rikku. I’m here now in this moment yes, but I’ll be here tomorrow and the day after…”

I nod my head in agreement, understanding your point. Back on our journey as guardians I had never been able to figure out how you always could read and placate my fears but you do it again in this moment. The look you are giving me now almost gives me pause.

I can see the love in your eyes.

But I need more than that. There is a very base craving driving me now. It is a need to prove that you are here with me, beyond the shadow of any doubt. I am the sandstorm and I will tear away everything in my path until I reach the edge of my desert and encounter the ocean.

I smirk, then push down with my hips to give my words emphasis. “You’re going to have to survive tonight if you intend to be here tomorrow,” I tease.

Your eyes grow wide, then dark. I can feel you giving in; it was only a matter of time. You sit up a bit to kiss me, _hard_ , and when we break I catch another glance at your eyes. I barely swallow a moan when I see what I’ve been seeking after. I see the same winds that drive my sandstorm kicking up the ocean waves.

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Sometimes I still wake up in the middle of the night and reach for you half expecting for my hand to hit empty sheets, or worse, pass right through you. Instead my hand hits flesh, and even though I know it can’t be nice to be woken up in this manner in the middle of the night, you always respond with a sleepy grin.

Tonight is one of those nights.

“I’m still here,” you say, without opening your eyes. Your tone is affectionate, patient.

“Cunno…” I mumble, withdrawing my hand from your chest.

_Sorry_ _…_

It’s obvious why I am so nervous. Tomorrow I am supposed to stand on the deck of an airship and promise to cherish and care for you for forever. There is nothing scary about saying what I already know is true in front of a crowd of family and friends. What is terrifying are these nightmares, each one a variation of the same moment. This is the moment right after we exchange our vows, when you lean forward to kiss me and I tilt my head up, then close my eyes and … nothing. In my dreams I will open my eyes again and every time you are gone. Your kiss has gone right through me and I am alone again on the deck of an airship.

I had wanted an Al Bhed wedding. Cactus flowers at the ceremony and our first night together in the open desert, under the starry sky. Who knew I was so traditional when it came to weddings?

But the airship setting made the most sense, and ultimately I had to agree to it. An airship can only fit so many passengers, a characteristic that has come to our aid on this occasion. Practically speaking, there was no way we would be able to get out of inviting half of Spira to the ceremony unless we had a venue that limited the guest list for us.

It made sense logistically, yes, but there is another reason you were pushing for this so hard. I know you Tidus; under normal circumstances you would have given me my desert wedding simply because it was what I wanted, logistics a mere afterthought. No, we are getting married on the deck of an airship because you have something to prove.

What is it that you are trying to prove?

“Prove?” you mumble, your voice filled with sleep.

I cover my mouth, not realizing I had vocalized my last thought out loud. My heart beats faster but I am unsure if it is because I fear that you heard me, or I fear that you are going to answer the question.

I smile weakly. “Oh…it’s nothing I was just thinking to myself,” I whisper. “I’m sorry for waking you, Tidus.”

Your eyes are open now, taking in my weak smile and I know in an instant you are not fooled. You sit up slightly, one hand at your face trying to rub the sleep out of your eyes. You exhale, then yawn, and I find that I am not quite looking you in your eyes, instead my mind is pretending there is something interesting in the darkness at the foot of our bed.

“You think… I am trying to prove something?” you ask.

I relax a little bit because I can tell your tone is not accusatory. Curious, and mixed with sleepiness, but not angry or defensive. This emboldens me. “Tell me. Tell me why the airship?”

 “The airship…?”

“And don’t say because of the guest list, that’s not the real reason. You don’t have to protect me Tidus, please just tell me.”

You sigh again, and I sense you have already succumbed to my desire to know the truth.

“Okay.” You reach out to me and cover my hand with your own. “Okay, Rikku. Answer me honestly. How many times have you been on an airship since… since after we defeated Sin?”

This question catches me by surprise, but it doesn’t take me long to answer. “5… maybe 6 times?”

You nod. “Right. And because Brother has told me I know for a fact you had several opportunities to come aboard the _Celsius_ and take to the skies. But you never took him up on his offer, and even after I came back you just… don’t seem to ever want to be on one.”

I open my mouth to make excuses but your wide grin make me hesitate.

“Don’t try to explain your reasons, hold on.” Another warm smile. “See, I know you Rikku, and I know the girl I am going to marry tomorrow would love nothing more than to be travelling this world in search of ancient treasures, spheres, machina of any kind.” You smile at this thought, but then your countenance turns more somber.

“Do you remember, what you said to me at the Farplane? During Yuna’s pilgrimage, in Guadosalam? You said to me ‘ _Memories are nice, but that_ _’s all they are_.’”

I gasp as you repeat my words back to me. We never talked about this, not in all the time since you came back to me. I find myself speechless, trying to understand.

“I guess I do have something to prove. I am more than just a _memory_ , Rikku. I’m not just the memory of a bunch of Fayth, I’m not just some trick of the pyreflies. I’m… I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.”

You lean over and kiss me, light and chaste. “Tomorrow I am going to kiss you on top of that airship deck, and I am not going to disappear. I’m going to prove it to you. And I’m going to prove to you that you are meant to be up there in the clouds. You aren’t going to stay grounded because of me.”

At what point my tears started I have no idea. At what point I fell asleep wrapped up in your arms I do not remember.

What I do remember is that when you kissed me on the airship deck the following day, shortly after declaring in Al Bhed your devotion to me in front of as many people an airship could hold, you did not disappear. Your lips lingered for an extended moment, and when we finally pulled away the look on your face was one of supreme satisfaction. You had proven your point.

You are more than just a memory, and I was meant to fly.


End file.
